So we are both college students but from different colleges, and I’ve been dating her for about a month and Its my first time dating someone. About two days ago, I had to complete a project quiz with my teammates (2 girls and 1 guy) in the evening. Originally, it was supposed to be done during the day, but due to delays we couldn’t finish it. Since my teammates live in hostels where the opposite gender isn’t allowed and we needed a quiet, closed room, my flat was the only option left. They came around 8 PM, we did the quiz, had some small talk, and they left by 9:30 PM. I didn’t think to inform my girlfriend beforehand, but when she later asked who came, I told her everything clearly. Since then, she’s been extremely upset, not really listening to my explanations. I had no idea that this can cause so much of issue. I’ve apologized many times, explained the situation, reassured her it won’t happen again, and asked what exactly is bothering her, but she hasn’t opened up much. I genuinely didn’t have any bad intentions, and it’s stressing me out, draining me, to the point that I’m not able to focus on anything. I really love her a lot and want this to work out, but I’m not sure how to make her understand my perspective while still respecting her feelings. Has anyone been in a similar situation, and how did you handle it? Any advice would mean a lot right now.
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Itz only been a month. She has shown herself to be a very insecure & controlling “girlfriend” so you need to do the appropriate thing and put her back in the pond.
I’m not even sure what she was mad about. She’s at a different school but decides who you visit or meet with at yours?
If someone getz upset for a ridiculous reason never apologize to appease them. They will just keep pushing. Kind of like Hitler with Czechoslovakia.
Don’t be Neville Chamberlain.
You did nothing the warrant this type of response. If this type of behavior is already happening so early it is a huge red flag. Its easy to think this behavior will stop when she realizes that you are trustworthy and loyal, but at the end of the day her behavior has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her internal insecurities. Unfortunately it isn’t possible to fix other people’s problems by loving them. Relationships need a strong foundation, something that is already so unstable is only going to get more difficult. I understand you care about her, but don’t let anyone get in the way of your own mental health and wellbeing!
It’s not love after a month. It’s infatuation. She can’t communicate, be logical or face conflict so she’s not ready for a relationship. She needs to work on herself.
Imo, unless you think she genuinely did not understand your intentions and the situation, its useless to try and explain that again. You can try asking her what you can do to make her feel reassured that shes the only one. If shes not opening up, reassure her in any way you can that you love her and her only. Don’t talk to the other girls unless you need to, be extra affectionate, send gifts, etc. Hopefully that gets her comfortable enough to talk about it to a point where you can both move on.
I’m sorry that your first relationship is so confusing. It’s not meant to be. A good relationship doesn’t look like this.
Your gf is overly jealous and I cannot encourage you to continue in this relationship. Let her go. Date other girls. You don’t have to get all hot and heavy. Just enjoy the company of a menagerie.
Maybe in a few years when this young lady grows up, she will be nicer and more self aware.
Maybe you should let her know beforehand.
Dude, grow some self respect. You don’t need to explain, nor tell her you didn’t have bad intents. She’s a rager who will be upset if you have any interaction with another woman. Save yourself years of grief and dump her.
A wild over reaction on your GFs part. I’m female and my partner goes out with his female friends, went on a holiday when we were 7 months in without me but with guys and girls present.
You either trust your other half or you don’t. If you have concerns you raise them in a grown up way, not by being this angry. It isn’t an appropriate way to treat a partner.
Your girlfriend is being ridiculous. There is nothing there to be annoyed about. This is a big red flag.
There is no her and your perspective to be heard. There is just the fact that you had classmates over to do schoolwork.
That should never be a problem since she doesn’t live with you. If it were her home too, she should have had a say, but it is not.
You don’t love love her. You don’t know her. Now she starts acting herself and it’s not pretty. She is extremely jealous and is starting to control you. She’s not rational.