personally, I think it’s better to try it out at least once. There’s a saying that goes along the lines of “better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it.” In a way, dating, kissing, and having sex are part of the human experience that can affect how you grow and socialize with the world around you. To “have” an experience on certain things, can have a good effect on you in the long run. The more experiences you have, the better you can socialize with others and react to the circumstances around you. If you handle these experiences well, they could really help with making your world wider and even empathizing with those around you.
but then, at the end of the day, it’s really up to you.
Do u genuinely not want to? Or is it more like your scared of rejection and or embarrassment so u figure it’s easier to not even try? Cause there’s a big difference between those two.
Maybe missing out on the experience itself but don’t go do these things just for the sake of it. The best part about having these experiences for the first time is the excitement and love behind when they happen. They’re all memorable. So find someone you may eventually feel the want to do these things with and cherish the memory. And if you never do, its okay to love yourself
Nope! I didnt want to either and i tried because i thought I was missing out. I hated it lol. If you’re unsure maybe try, if you’re already sure, don’t worry, you arent missing anything
I don’t think so, if you truly don’t want to. I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 26, sex at 27, and had a situationship at 29. I’m now 32 and haven’t been dating/seeing anyone since I ended the situationship two and a half-ish years ago. I don’t miss any of it 🤣
I mean… yeah. But you should still only do things that you want to do. I deliberately choose to miss out on lots of things, because I am not interested in them.
I’m going to ‘miss out’ on seeing the Minecraft movie in theaters, because it does not look fun to me. If dating and sex are as uninteresting to you as the Minecraft movie is to me, then you are probably improving your quality of life by missing out on them.
Most people like it but not everyone. I think it depends on your reasons. If your reasons are physical, that’s fine. If your reasons are mental, then maybe you might want to address it someday and figure out why.
You are not missing out. Sex is bad unless people are actually attracted to each other. Many people in relationships don’t make each other cum and have to pretend to be satisfied so the other person doesn’t get abusive. Just get a vibrator and some toys and don’t let anyone who’s less than what you deserve degrade you by using your body to feel cool.
Yes. Of course. Next to listening to music for me is human intimacy…being that close to someone and needing that is like needing water and drinking a cold glass on a hot day….whew…pretty close if not better.
I’ve never been super into kissing or sex and was single for a long time and perfectly content. Now I’m married and I like kissing and having sex with my wife because it makes her happy, but the actual physical acts don’t matter as much to me. The thing that I like about it is the intimacy and connection more than the actual kissing and sex.
So I would say that even if you’re more on the asexual side, which I think I am, being single means you’re missing out on the intimacy and connection piece, which is IMO really special and nice.
Yes, romance and sex are amongst the greatest joys in life for most people.
No, it’s not going to be enjoyable if you don’t want it. There is no way to force it.
Think of it this way. Do you like eating? What’s your favorite food? Would you still want to eat it if you’re really full? How about if you’re sick to your stomach and nauseous? What if you lost your sense of taste and smell?
Having a SO that is there to support your happiness and encourage your personality, helps you grow as a person in ways you wouldn’t without. They inspire you to be bigger than you already are.
The feeling of being in love is an indescribable one with no comparison. You don’t need it, it just elevates your experience on this earth.
By definition, yes. You aren’t experiencing something so you are missing that thing.
Whether that’s good or bad is totally up to your thoughts. You are missing out on shared orgasms but you’re also missing out on heartbreak, pregnancy scares, and chances of STD
From my personal opinion and experience you are big time missing out. But I’m somewhat hypersexual, so I would never be able to not have a lot of sex and love it very much – with all that it is.
But with that said. There’s nothing wrong with you not wanting to do any of it, at all! So for YOU – if you don’t have the urges or wishes to, you’re not missing out. You should only do things you want to do.
You’re not missing out on anything you don’t want to do. Enjoy your platonic attachments. You’re probably lucky, a lot of people want to date, kiss, and have sex and can’t figure out how.
Sex, by itself, isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. You’re not missing out on much. Romance is another thing, when it’s good it’s amazing, but unless it’s something you really want, again you’re not really missing out.
Missing out in the same way I’m “missing out” by being a lesbian. It’s fully possible you’re asexual/aromantic and that is as normal as any other flavor of queer or being hetero. I’d say it’s worth researching they why if you’re curious but there’s nothing wrong with not engaging with that side of human experience if you don’t want to
You do things because you either want to or are interested in them. Never do anything you’re not comfortable with simply because society has created stupid arbitrary boxes they expect you to tick. Never ever live with regrets. One day, it may happen, you may never have an interest, whatever happens, it’s your story. Ignore all these alpha freaks. Guarantee they are full of it. If you are indeed asexual or aromatic, you join one of the most beautiful bunch of people this world has ever produced. You do you.
You’re not missing out on something if it’s something that you don’t want. I’ve never eaten caviar because I don’t want to, and I don’t think I’m missing out.
Aren’t we all missing out on some or the other experience in life? The real question is, does it bother you? If it does then you work on it. If it doesn’t then live on 🤷🏾♀️
same here, i used to wonder that too — like, am i skipping something important? but honestly, if it’s not something you feel drawn to, then you’re not missing out. people act like intimacy is a checklist, but everyone moves differently. peace, clarity, and living on your own terms is way more fulfilling than doing something just because others say it matters.
Like others said: if you don’t want to, then no. But you might want to reflect on why you don’t want it. Are you just not into it like ace and aro people? Is there something holding you back cause you feel embarrassed or something? Or is there maybe some trauma that you aren’t processing well?
In the first instance I’d say you do you and maybe look around for asexual and aromantic spaces. In the latter cases there might be some merit in therapy.
Depends on why you dont want to. I enjoy kissing and physical intimancy, but i cant maintain things with a girl for very long because i am an extreme introvert and actively caring for someone that way is draining, so i mostly dont bother.
So in my case i “dont want to” but objectively i am missing out. If you are a true Ace and is truly indiferent to physical intimancy then you arent missing out, but if you never experienced it then there is a non-insignificant chance that you would actually enjoy it if you tried.
You have to do what is right for you, but you might not have experienced the emotional connection which can happen with those things. It is an emotional connection as well as a physical sensation
Those are things to done under right circumstances. Maybe you have not met those conditions. Maybe you will never want to. Some things have to be done right to be fully appreciated. You cannot figure out what is a good or bad date unless you been on one. Imagine what a great date would look like to you. Then ask the right person. Sometimes have no expectations produces the best result.
Personal and romantic connections are part of the beauty of being alive, you are, at least partly missing out yes, is that such a bad thing? You decide.
My psychotherapist agreed that too much emphasis is placed on romantic relationships. If you’re happy you’re happy. There’s no one right way to live life, other than to try to enjoy it as best you can.
Nope. I’m 38, and same, never done any of that. I am perfectly content. Don’t force yourself to do something you don’t want to do just because others say you should try it. It’s called asexuality, btw.
If you don’t want to, you’re not missing out on anything so I wouldn’t worry about it. Lots of people don’t want to do those things, there’s many other enjoyable aspects of life
I remember when they got a female libido pill and some women said “I need to take a pill that will make me want what I don’t want?” Definitely a very odd idea, isn’t it?
Only you know if you’re missing out. Does partnered sex appeal to you? Did you ever want to kiss someone? Want to be romantic with someone?
The fact you’re asking makes it seem likely the answer is not really. Sexual and romantic people generally tend to have these feelings even as young children. But it’s hard to dissect what you actually like and who you actually are in a culture that tells you everyone wants a traditional marriage— I know lots of people who got into a marriage because it was the thing to do, not because they actually really wanted it.
Why would you be missing out? If it’s not something you want to do then don’t. There’s no rule that says just because others people do something that you have to as well. Live your life the way you want to and you’ll be happiest.
You are supposed to have a biological magnet inside your brain telling you that you are missing out as a factory default. If you don’t have that and are wondering if it’s really all that great, you probably are on the spectrum of asexuality/aromatic.
It’s not that you are missing out or aren’t, I’m not even sure your brain will give out the correct amount of positive feeling chemicals if you even tried it.
Congrats, you have a superpower. Chances are you will encounter less heartache and depression by avoiding this annoying ass longing for physical touce. Go vibe with life and enjoy whatever friends you can make without worrying about feelings.
It depends. Is it really because you don’t want to, or because you’ve never been presented with the opportunity/been rejected? A rabbit could say it’s never beaten up a hippo because it doesn’t want to, but that doesn’t hold much weight because it can’t.
Answering that question honestly is potentially very mentally tough to take, but doing so may help you take the steps to actually achieve those goals if it’s what you want. I never used to have much success with women. Then I read a comment that really stuck with me which said; “ask yourself what you’d need to do to become the man who she’d be interested in”. Once you do that, you can start to form a long term plan. 2-3 years down the line (trust me, not a long time), you can be someone totally different. You can complete a degree, get in great shape, sort out your mental health, among many other things.
Or if it genuinely isn’t what you want then that’s fine too.
Kissing is amazing, dating is good but can easily be substituted with hanging out with friends. It’s important to leave the house sometimes. Sex can be take it or leave it. With some people, when the mood is right, it’s a firework explosion that leaves you craving more, other times it’s a limp microwaved taquito. And I can’t tell what predicts which outcome.
The highlights of dating essentially boil down to a heightened sense of enjoyment and belonging in life during the small things. Shopping usually sucks especially grocery shopping. Having a girlfriend with you typically makes it a bit more enjoyable. It’s hard to describe how it feels knowing that after a long bullshit day, warm and somewhat sensual cuddles are waiting for you in a comfy bed.
Sex is absolutely wonderful in the context of being in love imo. Your fiery feelings spill over into passionate mating and culminate in unbelievable climax and warm bonding afterwards. Sex in the casual sense is more or less the equivalent of pleasuring yourself with someone else. Not as potent when not actually in love imo.
Kissing is equally explained when occurring from a place of love versus pure lust. I could happily have a girlfriend sit on my lap while we kiss for hours. It’s just a magical feeling. Your mind is extremely quiet. Sensations and tingles all over as you feel her tongue swirl inside of your mouth. The tingles are almost overwhelming but pale in comparison to the other things that typically follow extended kissing.
No:
The ups and downs in any given relationship are absolutely exhausting. The horrible feeling when things inevitably collapse is indescribable. If you’re not careful, your entire mental health can take an awful hit when the relationship collapses. You can encounter a suffocating pit of depression and anxiety. Despite your better judgement, your mind will bombard you with absolutely vile negative thoughts. You will feel absolutely worthless. These feelings will subside with time and their potency will diminish with each new relationship, but they are the absolute worst feelings. One might be better off having never felt them.
You can only feel the more magic of love once. This is that butterfly oh my god feeling before your first relationship. Once things have ever gone wrong for the first time, you won’t ever have the same level of feelings again. It’s the equivalent of realizing Santa isn’t real.
Once you’ve had a taste of good sex, occasionally your body will crave more in a strong sense. You will find yourself keeping exes around and entertaining low quality company just to quench this thirst.
Does a fat kid like candy? Is a gay man on a dream vacation when he goes to prison? Yes and yes and yes you’re missing out on the orgasmic orgasm there nothing else like it on earth, be fruitful and multiply
Only you can answer that. There is not right or wrong answer here. If it’s not something that’s important to you, then no – you haven’t missed anything.
There’s nuance to this. You don’t want to and that’s totally fine, don’t force yourself to do something you don’t feel is right just because others tell you it’s right. Forcing yourself is what leads those things to be bad experiences.
On the other hand, it’s very possible to miss out on good experiences as well. Taking a leap of faith into something new may pleasantly surprise you. Although, it sounds like you should take things as slow as possible if you decide that it might be worth it to put yourself out there.
Comments
>I don’t want to
Well there you go
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Well, if you don’t want to, then no. Only if you desire these things I’d say you’re missing out, but if not, then no.
If you unpack the reasons why you don’t want to. That will tell you if you’re actually missing out or not.
Yes, you’re missing out by choice. Which is fine if that’s what you want to do.
personally, I think it’s better to try it out at least once. There’s a saying that goes along the lines of “better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it.” In a way, dating, kissing, and having sex are part of the human experience that can affect how you grow and socialize with the world around you. To “have” an experience on certain things, can have a good effect on you in the long run. The more experiences you have, the better you can socialize with others and react to the circumstances around you. If you handle these experiences well, they could really help with making your world wider and even empathizing with those around you.
but then, at the end of the day, it’s really up to you.
It’s only missing out if you actually want to do it. I’ve never done Meth but I wouldn’t say I’m missing out.
No universal checklist for life; do what feels right.
If you don’t want to, you aren’t missing out. Welcome to the club
hello there, welcome to r/asexuality
Do u genuinely not want to? Or is it more like your scared of rejection and or embarrassment so u figure it’s easier to not even try? Cause there’s a big difference between those two.
Maybe missing out on the experience itself but don’t go do these things just for the sake of it. The best part about having these experiences for the first time is the excitement and love behind when they happen. They’re all memorable. So find someone you may eventually feel the want to do these things with and cherish the memory. And if you never do, its okay to love yourself
Technically yes, but in the same way that I’m missing out on furry conventions… not my thing, dawg 🤣
Being alone is better than being in a bad relationship.
Nope! I didnt want to either and i tried because i thought I was missing out. I hated it lol. If you’re unsure maybe try, if you’re already sure, don’t worry, you arent missing anything
I don’t think so, if you truly don’t want to. I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 26, sex at 27, and had a situationship at 29. I’m now 32 and haven’t been dating/seeing anyone since I ended the situationship two and a half-ish years ago. I don’t miss any of it 🤣
I mean… yeah. But you should still only do things that you want to do. I deliberately choose to miss out on lots of things, because I am not interested in them.
I’m going to ‘miss out’ on seeing the Minecraft movie in theaters, because it does not look fun to me. If dating and sex are as uninteresting to you as the Minecraft movie is to me, then you are probably improving your quality of life by missing out on them.
well if “you dont want to” then by definition ur not missing anything you want
if you dont want to then dont homie r/asexuality r/aromantic
Most people like it but not everyone. I think it depends on your reasons. If your reasons are physical, that’s fine. If your reasons are mental, then maybe you might want to address it someday and figure out why.
Only if you want to do those things
You are not missing out. Sex is bad unless people are actually attracted to each other. Many people in relationships don’t make each other cum and have to pretend to be satisfied so the other person doesn’t get abusive. Just get a vibrator and some toys and don’t let anyone who’s less than what you deserve degrade you by using your body to feel cool.
well if you don’t want to then you’re not missing out
if you don’t want to, why would you be missing out?? don’t feel pressured to do those things because society expects you to 🙂
When you became an adult didn’t the urge for sex feel very strong? To me it was an extreme feeling.
No. You’re missing absolutely NOTHING. Stay the way you are!!! I wish I had never done it…..
Curious how old you are
Yes. Of course. Next to listening to music for me is human intimacy…being that close to someone and needing that is like needing water and drinking a cold glass on a hot day….whew…pretty close if not better.
You might just be aromantic or asexual (or both!)
The only thing youre missing out on is the closeness you feel with someone, especially when you’re with someone you love. It can be a special thing.
Other than that, it’s honestly a hassle, I’d rather sleep for an hour
I’ve never been super into kissing or sex and was single for a long time and perfectly content. Now I’m married and I like kissing and having sex with my wife because it makes her happy, but the actual physical acts don’t matter as much to me. The thing that I like about it is the intimacy and connection more than the actual kissing and sex.
So I would say that even if you’re more on the asexual side, which I think I am, being single means you’re missing out on the intimacy and connection piece, which is IMO really special and nice.
Nope you sure aren’t, you can love yourself better than anyone else can
Yes and no.
Yes, romance and sex are amongst the greatest joys in life for most people.
No, it’s not going to be enjoyable if you don’t want it. There is no way to force it.
Think of it this way. Do you like eating? What’s your favorite food? Would you still want to eat it if you’re really full? How about if you’re sick to your stomach and nauseous? What if you lost your sense of taste and smell?
i’ve never done any of these either but i do want to. so idk
Yes you are missing out, i’ve learned more from heartbreak than anything
Your aren’t missing out on things you don’t want
Nope
Having a SO that is there to support your happiness and encourage your personality, helps you grow as a person in ways you wouldn’t without. They inspire you to be bigger than you already are.
The feeling of being in love is an indescribable one with no comparison. You don’t need it, it just elevates your experience on this earth.
From my point of view, yes you’re missing what gives life most of it’s meaning. From your point of view, you might not be missing anything.
How does one miss out on a thing they don’t want? If you don’t want to then that’s really all that matters.
You might be asexual, and that’s fine
By definition, yes. You aren’t experiencing something so you are missing that thing.
Whether that’s good or bad is totally up to your thoughts. You are missing out on shared orgasms but you’re also missing out on heartbreak, pregnancy scares, and chances of STD
You’re not missing out if you don’t want to.
We are not here by choice my friend. Don’t lie to yourself.
From my personal opinion and experience you are big time missing out. But I’m somewhat hypersexual, so I would never be able to not have a lot of sex and love it very much – with all that it is.
But with that said. There’s nothing wrong with you not wanting to do any of it, at all! So for YOU – if you don’t have the urges or wishes to, you’re not missing out. You should only do things you want to do.
You don’t miss out on things you don’t want to do.
Duh
Nope you aint, it’s all meaningless, overrated and a waste of time, keep doing what you do
From my perspective, yes. From your perspective, obviously not.
Yes
Missing out isn’t necessarily a bad thing, especially since you don’t want these things.
why would you be missing out of you don’t want to do it
You’re not missing out on anything you don’t want to do. Enjoy your platonic attachments. You’re probably lucky, a lot of people want to date, kiss, and have sex and can’t figure out how.
Not really.
It’s an ego boost if you aren’t looking for a relationship, i guess, but hookups and random pda aren’t fulfilling to most people.
Sex, by itself, isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. You’re not missing out on much. Romance is another thing, when it’s good it’s amazing, but unless it’s something you really want, again you’re not really missing out.
How old are you? This does affect my answer
Yes
Missing out in the same way I’m “missing out” by being a lesbian. It’s fully possible you’re asexual/aromantic and that is as normal as any other flavor of queer or being hetero. I’d say it’s worth researching they why if you’re curious but there’s nothing wrong with not engaging with that side of human experience if you don’t want to
Quite frankly, YES, anybody who says otherwise is just trying to make you feel better.
My friend sister is asexul. She said she never crave or miss sexual relationship
You do things because you either want to or are interested in them. Never do anything you’re not comfortable with simply because society has created stupid arbitrary boxes they expect you to tick. Never ever live with regrets. One day, it may happen, you may never have an interest, whatever happens, it’s your story. Ignore all these alpha freaks. Guarantee they are full of it. If you are indeed asexual or aromatic, you join one of the most beautiful bunch of people this world has ever produced. You do you.
Either ace or, you know, just don’t want to. You can have stuff you want or don’t want.
Yes
If you don’t want it, you’re not missing out. You’re only missing out if you feel like something is lacking.
If you’re asexual you should not feel like you have to do those things.
As a person on the opposite end of the spectrum, sex is pretty important to me, but it just varies by person.
Do you enjoy orgasms when you’re alone? Or do you just not care to have an orgasm at all?
You’re not missing out on something if it’s something that you don’t want. I’ve never eaten caviar because I don’t want to, and I don’t think I’m missing out.
stay a virgin
Aren’t we all missing out on some or the other experience in life? The real question is, does it bother you? If it does then you work on it. If it doesn’t then live on 🤷🏾♀️
same here, i used to wonder that too — like, am i skipping something important? but honestly, if it’s not something you feel drawn to, then you’re not missing out. people act like intimacy is a checklist, but everyone moves differently. peace, clarity, and living on your own terms is way more fulfilling than doing something just because others say it matters.
You’re missing out. Women are awesome and soft
Like others said: if you don’t want to, then no. But you might want to reflect on why you don’t want it. Are you just not into it like ace and aro people? Is there something holding you back cause you feel embarrassed or something? Or is there maybe some trauma that you aren’t processing well?
In the first instance I’d say you do you and maybe look around for asexual and aromantic spaces. In the latter cases there might be some merit in therapy.
Depends on why you dont want to. I enjoy kissing and physical intimancy, but i cant maintain things with a girl for very long because i am an extreme introvert and actively caring for someone that way is draining, so i mostly dont bother.
So in my case i “dont want to” but objectively i am missing out. If you are a true Ace and is truly indiferent to physical intimancy then you arent missing out, but if you never experienced it then there is a non-insignificant chance that you would actually enjoy it if you tried.
You’re not. Get a vibrator/fleshlight if u want good sex. Kissing is not as good as it seems online.
Dating causes you headaches nowadays because people don’t treat each other like humans
You have to do what is right for you, but you might not have experienced the emotional connection which can happen with those things. It is an emotional connection as well as a physical sensation
You are probally asexual cause if you wanted you would probably seek it out. If you do not want to do something do not do it, do what you like.
“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” is a famous line from Alfred, Lord Tennyson’s poem “In Memoriam A.H.H.”.
No. If you have no desire to do those things, don’t then won’t enhance your enjoyment of life. Do what makes you satisfied.
Not really
Not if you don’t want to.
Nope
I am in the same boat as you except I do actually want to. I am missing out, while you are not.
Except considering I’m in the same boat as you, perhaps I don’t actually know if I’m missing out or not, I just feel like I am.
Those are things to done under right circumstances. Maybe you have not met those conditions. Maybe you will never want to. Some things have to be done right to be fully appreciated. You cannot figure out what is a good or bad date unless you been on one. Imagine what a great date would look like to you. Then ask the right person. Sometimes have no expectations produces the best result.
Personal and romantic connections are part of the beauty of being alive, you are, at least partly missing out yes, is that such a bad thing? You decide.
I’m not missing out on the things I have no interest in doing.
Yes.
My psychotherapist agreed that too much emphasis is placed on romantic relationships. If you’re happy you’re happy. There’s no one right way to live life, other than to try to enjoy it as best you can.
Nope. I’m 38, and same, never done any of that. I am perfectly content. Don’t force yourself to do something you don’t want to do just because others say you should try it. It’s called asexuality, btw.
If you don’t want to, you’re not missing out on anything so I wouldn’t worry about it. Lots of people don’t want to do those things, there’s many other enjoyable aspects of life
I remember when they got a female libido pill and some women said “I need to take a pill that will make me want what I don’t want?” Definitely a very odd idea, isn’t it?
Only you know if you’re missing out. Does partnered sex appeal to you? Did you ever want to kiss someone? Want to be romantic with someone?
The fact you’re asking makes it seem likely the answer is not really. Sexual and romantic people generally tend to have these feelings even as young children. But it’s hard to dissect what you actually like and who you actually are in a culture that tells you everyone wants a traditional marriage— I know lots of people who got into a marriage because it was the thing to do, not because they actually really wanted it.
you can’t miss out on things that don’t interest you.
I mean, you’re only missing out if you want to
As they say: Sex is great, but it’s not a good as the real thing.
😭 I’ve dated but not the rest.
Don’t plan on having sex till I die tbh 😭but no, you not missing out
Seriously? Lucky. I would’ve been able to play so many video games if I hadn’t desired any of that stuff.
Hard to say. I think so, but if you’re asexual maybe not.
You’re not missing anything if you don’t want to in the first place.
The good thing about not wanting to is that you dont care if you are missing out.
Are you missing out? Yea sure. On a lot of drama and heartbreak and trauma and paranoia.
If the good sex and good memories are worth it, its barely worth it. And to some people it might be barely not worth it.
I dont really date or have sex that much either. I can pop out when i want to. But man the shit is exhausting to me
once you do it, you will realize how overrated the shit is with all but the one, IF any, extremely compatible
Why would you be missing out? If it’s not something you want to do then don’t. There’s no rule that says just because others people do something that you have to as well. Live your life the way you want to and you’ll be happiest.
No
If you don’t want to then no. Its your life do what you want
Bruh…
You are supposed to have a biological magnet inside your brain telling you that you are missing out as a factory default. If you don’t have that and are wondering if it’s really all that great, you probably are on the spectrum of asexuality/aromatic.
It’s not that you are missing out or aren’t, I’m not even sure your brain will give out the correct amount of positive feeling chemicals if you even tried it.
Congrats, you have a superpower. Chances are you will encounter less heartache and depression by avoiding this annoying ass longing for physical touce. Go vibe with life and enjoy whatever friends you can make without worrying about feelings.
It depends. Is it really because you don’t want to, or because you’ve never been presented with the opportunity/been rejected? A rabbit could say it’s never beaten up a hippo because it doesn’t want to, but that doesn’t hold much weight because it can’t.
Answering that question honestly is potentially very mentally tough to take, but doing so may help you take the steps to actually achieve those goals if it’s what you want. I never used to have much success with women. Then I read a comment that really stuck with me which said; “ask yourself what you’d need to do to become the man who she’d be interested in”. Once you do that, you can start to form a long term plan. 2-3 years down the line (trust me, not a long time), you can be someone totally different. You can complete a degree, get in great shape, sort out your mental health, among many other things.
Or if it genuinely isn’t what you want then that’s fine too.
Do you feel like you’re missing out? Because if you don’t you’re not. Life isn’t all about intimate relationships
Not if ya don’t want to.
You do you and fork the rest.
Godspeed and all that.
> because I don’t want to.
Then no.
Kissing is amazing, dating is good but can easily be substituted with hanging out with friends. It’s important to leave the house sometimes. Sex can be take it or leave it. With some people, when the mood is right, it’s a firework explosion that leaves you craving more, other times it’s a limp microwaved taquito. And I can’t tell what predicts which outcome.
No babe
No, because you don’t want to. I’m not missing out on going to a football match, because I have no interest in going.
In some ways yes. In other ways no.
Yes:
The highlights of dating essentially boil down to a heightened sense of enjoyment and belonging in life during the small things. Shopping usually sucks especially grocery shopping. Having a girlfriend with you typically makes it a bit more enjoyable. It’s hard to describe how it feels knowing that after a long bullshit day, warm and somewhat sensual cuddles are waiting for you in a comfy bed.
Sex is absolutely wonderful in the context of being in love imo. Your fiery feelings spill over into passionate mating and culminate in unbelievable climax and warm bonding afterwards. Sex in the casual sense is more or less the equivalent of pleasuring yourself with someone else. Not as potent when not actually in love imo.
Kissing is equally explained when occurring from a place of love versus pure lust. I could happily have a girlfriend sit on my lap while we kiss for hours. It’s just a magical feeling. Your mind is extremely quiet. Sensations and tingles all over as you feel her tongue swirl inside of your mouth. The tingles are almost overwhelming but pale in comparison to the other things that typically follow extended kissing.
No:
The ups and downs in any given relationship are absolutely exhausting. The horrible feeling when things inevitably collapse is indescribable. If you’re not careful, your entire mental health can take an awful hit when the relationship collapses. You can encounter a suffocating pit of depression and anxiety. Despite your better judgement, your mind will bombard you with absolutely vile negative thoughts. You will feel absolutely worthless. These feelings will subside with time and their potency will diminish with each new relationship, but they are the absolute worst feelings. One might be better off having never felt them.
You can only feel the more magic of love once. This is that butterfly oh my god feeling before your first relationship. Once things have ever gone wrong for the first time, you won’t ever have the same level of feelings again. It’s the equivalent of realizing Santa isn’t real.
Once you’ve had a taste of good sex, occasionally your body will crave more in a strong sense. You will find yourself keeping exes around and entertaining low quality company just to quench this thirst.
Try it…if you don’t like it stop at any point you want…… or never do it again.
If you never tried how do you know you don’t want to? If you don’t like it, don’t do it. If you do, just got at it .
Does a fat kid like candy? Is a gay man on a dream vacation when he goes to prison? Yes and yes and yes you’re missing out on the orgasmic orgasm there nothing else like it on earth, be fruitful and multiply
If you have no desire to then you’re not missing out
Never had a threesome with two baddies because I don’t want to. Am I missing out?
No one can answer that for you. Try it, if you don’t like it you have your answer.
I definitely say yes . Some of the best feelings you are missing out. But hey whatever makes you happy
Only you can answer that. There is not right or wrong answer here. If it’s not something that’s important to you, then no – you haven’t missed anything.
There’s nuance to this. You don’t want to and that’s totally fine, don’t force yourself to do something you don’t feel is right just because others tell you it’s right. Forcing yourself is what leads those things to be bad experiences.
On the other hand, it’s very possible to miss out on good experiences as well. Taking a leap of faith into something new may pleasantly surprise you. Although, it sounds like you should take things as slow as possible if you decide that it might be worth it to put yourself out there.
Dude if I could have stayed a virgin do you know how wealthy I’d be right now?
And so much less complications. But the bell can never be un-rung.