Not giving a fuck about what people think is one of the worst advice I have ever heard. Not because it’s completely not true, but because it’s often stated as an absolute without the correct context.
You should absolutely give a fuck about what people think about you, but to be more accurate, you have to know who to give a fuck and who not to give a fuck.
People judge others, this is by human nature. It’s how we survived for the millennia of human existence. We do it subconsciously even if you think you never judge.
It’s how we distinguish the traits of individuals on a somewhat reliable first impression. It’s useful for us as humans because we do this to distingush from people we should avoid, dangerous individuals or individuals who we see as safe. If a person who’s have bad hygiene, poor sense of clothing and generally a nasty attitude, we internally judge them and stay away from them.
We care about what other think too. For example, if you’re going on your first day of work, you dress smart, act with good attitude because you want to make an impression to your colleagues and employers. We wear suits and tie when meeting clients because it invokes a sense of professionalism.
This advice is misleading because it’s often given without context. The people we should absolutely give a fuck about what they think of us are people who are very involved with our lives. People such as your colleagues, your bosses, your family, etc…
However, the advice applies to people who we only see once in our life. The people you pass by on the subway, the people sitting next to you at a restaurant, the people passing by you in a sidewalk. You should absolutely not give a fuck about what they think because even if they judge you, they’re going to forget about their judgement and your existence in a matter of hours after interaction, they don’t give a fuck about you to care and this applies to you too with other strangers.
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>This advice is misleading because it’s often given without context.
I disagree. I think it always is given with context; people don’t say this out of the blue. They say it in response to something, and that’s the context.
I don’t think people get told this when they stink or are going to a job interview, but they might if they’re too scared to speak up or do something fun.
There’s a difference is giving a fuck and presenting yourself to people for a purpose. I go in to work and present myself a certain way because I give a fuck about keeping my job. That doesn’t exactly mean I give a fuck what my boss thinks about me though. I think of it like “alright here goes” and if they don’t like it that’s when I’m like “ okay nevermind. That didn’t work” and that’s that. If I gave a fuck about what they thought then I would continue trying to readjust to fit their ideas of who I should be – idgaf at that point though. I think that’s the distinction in my head at least.
Don’t give a fuck once you’re in a position to do so.
This is so true and great advice.
Not every thought needs to be a post.
Ignorance leads to more problems rather than it being a solution, so yeah, you’re right op.
The context is implied from the situation the advice is given from 🤦♀️
So basically you didn’t read Mark Manson’s book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck and are mad that no one explained the context…in a shorter version?
Eh, kinda don’t give a fuck