Location: queens, New York
I moved into a lovely apartment a month and a half ago. The landlord is reasonable, seems responsible and respectful. The person who lives above me was initially introduced to me with the landlord as the super and he helped me install my air conditioners and told me he is very close to the landlord personally and they only raise the rent for wear and tear reasons on the apartment. I told them I’m very quiet (I rarely play music, live alone, sometimes guests and watch tv , study). Since I moved in, the upstairs neighbor told me he is not the super and just “helping” out and from now on I should contact the landlord if I need anything. every time I see him he says he needs to talk to me and tells me that I’m walking too loudly (are you walking on your heels? Walk on your toes!) and slamming the toilet seat and it bothers him, and why was I moving my couch yesterday because it was noisy ( to clean under it), and why do I drop things (because I’m human) and am I doing these things to piss him off (obviously not) and he can tell when other people are over because he can differentiate the footsteps. Im pretty sure he also told me he can hear me when I cry. I bought lots of mats to put under the carpets to soften the floor noise and bought felt tips to put on the kitchen cabinet doors (both things he actually asked me to do when I moved in that i definitely did not need to do but I wanted to start off on the right foot with him so I did) because the sound of them was also bothering him. I told him I’m doing my best but I personally can’t control the nature of sound and the dynamics of the building. He told me that sometimes tenants are not invited back and then reminded me that my rent could be raised. I said “ you would raise my rent because I close the toilet seat too loudly ?” And he said “we’ll see.”
I’m not sure what to do in this situation. I like the apartment itself but I don’t feel like I have any privacy or that I can even make private phone calls (for example insurance companies, etc, with personal information) because if he can hear the cabinets and my footsteps, I’m guessing he can hear conversations too. Does this qualify as harassment? I’m hesitant to reach out to the landlord about how best to handle this because I don’t want to escalate matters but I’ve also tried to have open and honest conversations with the upstairs neighbor (former super? Not super ?) about his concerns and show him my effort but explain there or definite limitations because I exist and need to walk.
What should I do?