I’ve just about lost it multiple times over the past 1.5 years since my daughter was born and now with a second coming soon, I’m very concerned how to move forward.
my husband and I have known each other since childhood and have dated for a while/ married three years and I’ve always had a good relationship with my in laws until I got pregnant. When we told them I was pregnant/ the gender, the entire dinner then became about her and why she needed to retire early. Then continued to tell stories of her in labor and birth story the rest of the dinner (mind you I was 10 weeks pregnant).
Since my daughter was born it really only got worse. My husband and I are from the same town so I’d hear from others about her talking about us and how she only wants to be helpful. Without me asking, she set up a whole nursery in her home. When I was recovering from delivery, she called my mother to ask why I wasn’t feeling well and the details of my birth becasue “we weren’t telling her anything”
She would buy me facials and massages to get me out of the house to watch the baby and then feed her a bottle right before I would get home so I would have to pump and not BF – this led to mastitis for me.
Since being back at work, I stupidly planned on having my family and in laws babysit two days a week each. She now only makes and brings her own food for my daughter, not what I provide, she no longer give gifts for me to see. I’ll randomly find things in my daughter’s room. The craziest thing is that she gave a photo album of selfies of her and my daughter for her first birthday and called it a “grandparent book”.
She will manipulate plans with my husband so instead of us having the control of our day she’ll say things like she’s making our lives easier by coming to us and changing our plans we have already made. Now that I’m pregnant with my second, she constantly tries to tell us to get out and they will come babysit before the baby comes but we’ve said clearly multiple times we want to cherish the last month with just our daughter. She thinks our labor plans involve her, which we have never once asked her to help, she’s just assumed. I don’t want her coming into my home after the baby is born but I’m not sure how to stop this. We’ve hired part time help but this seems to make her overbearing ness worse. My husband understands she’s “difficult” but then now thinks I hate her which has caused multiple arguments for us. I’m sick of wasting brain power on this woman. Help!
Comments
Quick Rule Reminders:
OP’s needs come first, avoid dramamongering, respect the flair, and don’t be an asshole. If your only advice is to jump straight to NC or divorce, your comment may be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
^(Full Rules) ^(|) ^(Acronym Index) ^(|) ^(Flair Guide)^(|) ^(Report PM Trolls)
Resources: ^(In Crisis?) ^(|) ^(Tips for Protecting Yourself) ^(|) ^(Our Book List) ^(|) ^(Our Wiki)
Welcome to /r/JUSTNOMIL!
I’m botinlaw. I help people follow your posts!
^(To be notified as soon as Potential-Pickle-948 posts an update) [^click ^here.](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=botinlaw&subject=Subscribe&message=Subscribe Potential-Pickle-948 JUSTNOMIL) ^(|) ^(For help managing your subscriptions,) ^(click here.)
^(I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please) ^(contact the moderators of this subreddit) ^(if you have any questions or concerns.)