As far as I’m concerned, you can correct someone’s pronunciation of you name exactly once for most names. Then you gotta move the fuck on. If they give it a good faith effort, but may use a long vowel sound instead of a short vowel sound and you want to insist they say it perfectly, you are a loser.
And frankly, when I see people get pissy about this, I just assume they have absolutely no control over any part of their life and need to feel it during this interaction. It’s lame. The person doing customer service does not need to be saying your name correctly. The guy at the car shop doesn’t have to know you prefer the emphasis on a different syllable.
As for unfamiliar names to the speaker, like those originating from outside the corrector’s mother tongue, I think you get 2-3 attempts to go “No it’s actually __, like the word __.” I work internationally, and no one gets riled about name mispronounciations like this for short interactions. From people I know fitting this description, they are normally very used to the mispronounciations and don’t really care.
This does not go for people calling you the wrong name obviously, or people using a common but unwanted nickname. Correct away if that is the case.
Correct a coworker who has been saying your name wrong. Don’t insist the waitress say it back to you 8 times until she gets it right.
Signed, a person with a commonly mispronounced name that does not give a shit.
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It’s one thing if the person mispronouncing it is doing it because they just don’t care, but in my experience it’s more because they’ve just never seen that name before and not every name can just be read off a paper correctly. There are some of them that have extra emphasis on one part of it, or a letter is silent, etc. If they apologize and correct it, then yeah, you really just need to move on. The person is human and thus not perfect. It is what it is.
My art teacher mispronounced my name in first year, I corrected her, she continued to mispronounce it for 5 years. Never corrected her again just went with it. Eh whatever I know who I am.
I think this entirely depends on the name and how much effort someone puts into pronouncing it correctly. I have certainly seen many people put zero effort into trying to pronounce a name correctly, and those people are just assholes. Even worse if they immediately give up and say “I’m just going to call you blank“.
And I think some people also just get caught on bad days. If you have a name you’ve had to correct people on your whole life, occasionally you’re just gonna kinda snap on some people who obviously aren’t even trying.
Oh my god, kinda different but this reminds me of something. I used to know a girl named Epic. Any time someone used the word “epic” around her she’d always say, “That’s an interesting choice of words.” This went on for years until one day I finally got upset with her and told her it’s not my fault her name is a word that’s used in everyday language. I feel you, shit like this is dumb and annoying.
I agree. I don’t have an uncommon name (my name was really popular in the 90s but no longer) and about 70% of the time its mispronounced. My last name is pretty popular as there’s a few celebrities with the same name and about 60% of the time people mispronounce it.
I just keep it moving. I know exactly how my name is mispronounced so I know when I’m getting called at the doctors office and other places where strangers have to yell my name.
If you have a name that is obviously not from the country you live in, you don’t have any real right to be upset when people are trying and just not getting it right, especially if its from a different language. I don’t get upset when people from my own country don’t pronounce my name right so I don’t understand when people have a very different name from a different country get upset.
Like duh??? Of course people will have a hard time pronouncing your name, get over it.
As someone with a weird name that gets mispronounced a lot:
We only care if you don’t make an effort to just learn it. Everyone mispronounces my name first try and I understand.
It’s also really obvious when you don’t feel comfortable with a name because of where it’s coming from.
There’s no reason Lichtenstein should be a walk in the park but you can’t take a minute to learn how to pronounce Dzidefo. (Not my name btw)
I feel like if they’re saying it way wrong you get to correct them tho. If your name is Mai (rhyming with Sky) and someone calls you May (rhyming with Way), and they keep doing it you get to correct them because thats a whole other name. But if they’re emphasizing the wrong syllable or some small shit then yeah its annoying.
Yeah you not caring doesnt mean the rest of us dont. It’s basic respect
My name is Damara (Duh-Mar-Uh)
I couldn’t care less if someone mispronounced my name, and it happens quite often. I find it really funny though when their brains short circuit and start adding random letters…
Darmarka? Danaka? Damanda? Damarta? <— All real names I have gotten before lol
Lol, it makes my day sometimes ;P
My name is “Amarildo” which is OK in Italian. But most english-speaking people confuse it with “Armadillo”. Do not tell me how to feel lol
I work international and I straight up tell people a different version/pronunciation of my name depending on the language we’re speaking. I’m not going to expect an American to be able to pronounce totally new sounds! And most of my colleagues/ friends do that.
Also you know that thing “if they can learn to pronounce Van Gogh or they can learn to pronounce your name”? I have never once in my life met an American who can pronounce Van Gogh correctly.
Just get people’s names right
Oh man this unlocked a core memory. My brother decided to meet me after work to grab a drink. At my work, that happens to busy as fuck bar. I just worked 9 hours. My brother brought a Dutch friend of his. He introduced himself. I asked him could it say it one more time. I didn’t catch it. Big mistake.
He rolls his eyes, says his name again, then goes now you say it. This started a 20min back and forth. He makes me try and say it properly. Giving examples that make zero sense. He makes comments about Americans being rude. It’s like dude I have an auditory processing disorder and just got out of work. Please fuck all the way off.
My name is David so this doesn’t affect me directly, but if you can manage to pronounce Tchaikovsky, and Dostoevsky. (who have been dead for quite a while), you can make an effort to say the scary sounding-foreign name of the living breathing person that’s right in front of you.
Chinua Achebe is actually easier to figure out phonetically than Tchaikovsky and Dostoevsky. Yet somehow certain literature professors seem to struggle.
Did you know that there were people who intentionally mispronounce people‘s names as a sign of disrespect?
I have not heard my (low-German) last name pronounced correctly by anybody outside the immediate family in… +/- 10 years.
My given name is an old one, but an odd one. It is Native American in origin, but only one syllable off of a common English name, and also close to a traditional dog’s name.
If it’s even remotely close, I’ll respond.
I take a mild pleasure/fascination with the variety of names that appear on take-out receipts. I have never felt the need to correct.
If you’re a stranger and I never see you again, then I don’t care. Call me whatever you want. But if you’re a co-worker or a consistent person in my life, you owe it to me to learn how to say my name. Just like I learned to say your name. It’s just plain common decency and respect to take the time to learn somebody’s literal NAME if they’re in your life constantly.
My husband’s name gets mispronounced constantly and he even says “it’s pronounced , like the word ”. It literally couldn’t not be simpler. It’s 4 letters. But people will still butcher it and one time a co-worker just said “maybe I can just call you ___?” Like no, that’s not my name???
If you live in a country filled with people of all backgrounds and cultures, then you need to get with the program.
If you make an effort, I don’t care if you don’t get all the way there. If you don’t even try, or ask if you can call me a different name because my given name takes a little bit of thought, that’s not respectful.
You better be sick, dead, or mute, Ay-Ay-Ron
Wanna hear something even worse? There are two patients at the doctor’s office where I work, that also happen to be doctors. They had their names legally changed even with insurance to include “MD.” There two people insist on being called “doctor,” even when they are just patients. You’ll call their name, like “Roger?” And they’ll stand up and say, “it’s Doctor Fitzgerald.” Lol bitch idc about your resume, I’m looking for a Roger.
If the mispronunciation is corrected when shown then not an issue. If the person continues to mispronounce it after it is totally disrespectful. I knew a teacher that would make up new names or mispronounce “foreign” names correctly. Absolutely disgusting.
Everyone mispronounces my name. Because it’s a German pronunciation of an Indian name and I’m in the US. I usually don’t correct people at all unless they just really butcher it. I’ve shortened it to just the first syllable which helps.
For someone who doesn’t give a shit you seemed to feel the need to write seven paragraphs about it.
I agree. the only time when it bothers me is when my teachers take attendance, because I live in Italy so words are written the same way they’re pronounced, and it really isn’t hard to read my surname
Nah, people need to make a fucking effort. My full name is unusual and people unsurprisingly always mispronounced it. So I have used the shortened version (Jen) for years to make it easier for people. They still get it fucking wrong! I am not pissing Jan!
Lol since this is about passing strangers, I think most people would agree with you. It’s one thing if your friend or coworker says it wrong and you are dealing with it every day. Then it makes sense to get it fixed up, or as best as they are able. If it’s a total stranger, no need to hold the both of you up.
A mispronunciation of my name is a different name all together. I should suck up and deal with the fact that people can’t read til the end of the word? If they hear my name they don’t mispronounce it fully but may say the vowels weirdly, which is fine.
I have been correcting people my whole life and will continue to do so. Even offering alternatives as I know it’s not an easy name.
Why I correct people? There are some I have not corrected and boy do they feel dumb and angry when they hear me say my name right. “I didn’t know I’ve been mispronouncing your name all these years! Why didn’t you tell me?” I did and you didn’t listen, so I dealt.
Who wants to be called the wrong name? It’s disrespectful.
My surname is an odd mix of making an Eastern European name sound French Canadian. In my five plus decades on this earth, no one, ever, has pronounced it correctly the first time. Some never quite get it. People I’ve known for 30 years still struggle.
I can’t even count how many times when I’m at an office or something and the clerk will start calling for me by saying ‘Mr…Mr…’ clearly struggling, before they just call me by my first name.
I have never gotten mad, angry or insulted. I know my name is tough. But it almost always turns into a conversation about the origin of my name. Which I absolutely don’t mind talking about. It’s unique and I’m proud of it.
Disagree people in these positions don’t even try. I have the world’s easiest name for where I live.
“Heather” People mess it up all the time. Now I don’t care but I can’t even imagine the annoyance of someone with a slightly different name everyone always misspelling it, mispronouncing it etc..
This subject is nuaced and it depends which person or who. Is it a teacher who will be teaching you an entire year or more?
Or the bag boy from Walmart? Different levels of give of fuck. The bag boy doesn’t need to even know my name. I mean I’ll probably get his because that’s polite but I agree he doesn’t need to know how to say my name. The waiter doesn’t need to, but the lady at the reception desk of my doctor’s office who is writing it in notes and shit. I’d hope they can at least learn to spell it.
Is it someone I come into contact with everyday who uses it? Then they should probably get their shit together.
Also it’s different depending on the person. Do they speak another language and are struggling? Are they always trying but just never quite getting it? That’s fine.
But to some degree in certain situations effort is important for society to remain cohesive even in the small shit like trying our best to pronounce people’s names when necessary.
I agree necessary isn’t as often as people make it seem but it’s neither never important as you claim.
I am delighted to discover new sounds to make, I relish “unusual or foreign” name and strive to pronounce them correctly. I’ve only had one Israeli name that apparently I couldn’t say correctly, and it still bugs me!
I think you’re being harsh, some people take more than once to learn a new thing.
My last name is mispronounced all the time. People always feel the need to add letters to it or pronounce it with a k.
The only time I say anything is when it’s someone I will have to deal with on the regular.
People in customer service I just laugh with how they pronounce it.
My sister worked with her wedding officiant to make sure he pronounced her name correctly during the ceremony and guess what? He still butchered it. Some people make absolutely no effort, especially with foreign names. My niece tried to make sure they pronounced her name correctly during her college graduation ceremony and the person just rolled their eyes and pronounced it incorrectly. This at a school that supposedly prides itself on diversity.
So, no, I don’t think you’re a looser if you want people to make a basic effort to address you by your correct name.
Signed by someone with a very easy name that still gets mispronounced regularly
I got into an accident and I ended up needing to go to a Dr every Tuesday for about 2 months. Same Dr every week. And every week they would mispronounce my name when they would call me from the waiting room. And every week I would correct them. It’s not even a hard name in the slightest. They were just lazy and I feel like I had every right to be pissed off by it lol
This opinion is gross. People do not name themselves. People mispronounce my name and it is very normal. I think ppl struggle with basic reading and there are no excuses.
Very unpopular indeed. You call me whatever you want. But you’re gonna say my name properly. It’s not hard. If We both speak the same language, you can read above a kindergarten lvl, and you have no issues when you say Anthony Jeselnik, you can say my name properly.
This 100 percent comes from me watching ppl abuse the alphabet when it comes to black ppl. At this point, I’m not as angry about it as I used to be, but I’m far more petty.
If my name is stefon (Steph-on) and you continue to call me Stephen after corrections. Ima call you Jimmy, Jamie. It is what it is at that point.
Exceptions are made obviously. Some ppl have speech impediments or speak a different language, and some names are actually hard to say if you don’t have the same accent. But when you lack the respect to try to say my name properly….ima turn into a cry baby bitch cause…
Exchange money with name.
I’m so fucking used to it and get asked where I’m from, despite being born in this country.
Actually it amuses me.^^
At some point you have to get over it, but it did irk me when people would mispronounce “Kamala” and I don’t even like her. She even helped a sista out – rhymes with Mom-ala – and yet people STILL mispronounced it. Democrats, Republicans, journos….freaking Joe Biden pronounced it three different ways when he was announcing her as his VP. Grrrr…..
I have said my toddler’s name in front of the swim teacher, who still does not pronounce it correctly.
I have done this in front of the pediatrician as well, with similar results.
My toddler takes it in stride. But it bothers me that an educator can’t be bothered to pronounce her student’s name correctly.
This isn’t about entitlement. It’s about understanding that I am worth the effort to have my name pronounced correctly, and if you can’t be bothered, I don’t really have any need for you in my life.
If someone says it hah-na instead of Hannah which obviously rhymes with banana, I notice but don’t care.
If someone says my last name correctly (which I’m not posting, sorry) I’m like “WOAH YOU DID IT!!!” which is a nice treat for both of us.
My last name isn’t common but it’s only four letters and it’s easy to pronounce for anyone who can read! People still mispronounce it and I don’t know why. It’s called stupidity when you just assume it’s a different name because you can’t be bothered to actually look at it and then say it! I’m sorry that you’re not that intelligent but you are the one acting entitled.
In general, I agree, like there’s only so much people can do. But my family has names are easy to pronounce. They are spelled exactly the way they sound. But they still get mispronounced almost every time a stranger says them for no reason. That annoys me because it’s lack of care.
I like hearing my name in different accents personally
Both my first and last name are constantly mispronounced. It doesn’t bother me when the last name is mispronounced but I’m very particular about how people pronounce my first name as I hate the way it sounds mispronounced
A stranger mispronouncing my name? Sure I don’t care because it’s unlikely that we’ll ever see each other again. I am not going to be upset at the barista at Starbucks or even the receptionist at a doctor’s office for a slight mispronunciation because it’s not done intentionally. For the people who I have to have some sort of relationship with, take the time to learn my name. I have a fairly common name and there’s only a few pronunciations of it but people tend to gravitate towards the one that it’s definitely not. When I correct people, most of the time people apologize and pronounce my name correctly, some people just can’t wrap their head around the fact that my name is not the pronunciation that they want to use so they switch between the pronunciations, and a small percentage just double down and call me the wrong name which is frustrating.
The first time I ever got in trouble in school was because my 2nd grade teacher decided that she was going to pronounce my name the way she thought my name should have been pronounced so I just ignored her every time she called on me.
I remember a guy I used to work at my company finally told me, “I thought your name was Roger! I’ve been calling you that for 2 years and you didn’t correct me?!” 🤣
If it’s someone you’re going to encounter and interact with, with some frequency (a peer, co-worker, etc.), I do think it behooves them to try and learn how to say your name correctly.
Obviously with some leeway if there is a language barrier, since not all languages use the same sounds or enunciations. Hell, even within one’s own language or country, there are names you may not know how to pronounce. I’m an American in my 30s, and I still see occasionally find other Americans with names I’ve never seen before and am not sure how to say at first.
People deserve a little leeway.
But if they never learn how to properly say it (or at least say it close to how it should be said) and it’s clearly out of dismissiveness or laziness, then I do definitely have a bit of a problem with it.
(My other big issue is that I’ve seen people really fly off the handle over this topic before. Like I’ve seen people try to claim it’s “microaggressions” or even flat-out “racism” to not automatically know how to say a foreign name you’ve never seen before. That’s just ridiculous. People are allowed to make mistakes and not know things.)
I’m not even going to read your post. I have one of those names and it’s fucking annoying. Learn how to say my last name. I could be a billionaire if I had a nickel for every time it was not said wrong but spelled wrong. We have a right to have our names pronounced correctly. Don’t be lazy learn how to pronounce somebody’s name.
Context is important
Calling our your name at Starbucks? Who cares. A coworker repeatedly fucking your name up or your name at graduation? They need to do a better job.
Truly depends on the context.
I get being upset in general if no one pronounces your name right. It’s tiring to hear it over and over again so it’s difficult to just “move on”. Getting mad specifically at the stranger that saw that name for the first time is rude though.
it’s okay to correct more often. It’s a name, and names are important for a lot of people because it’s literally the first thing that will pop of when people think / talk about you. Its not weird to want that to be pronounce correctly
if you will see that person more often, like a coworker you meet for the first time, it’s fair to expect from them to pronounce your name right after a while, or at least try /get somewhere close. I know not all names are easy to pronounce in all languages. Many don’t get mad if they’re trying / being mindfull / respectfull about it. But if they say “yeah I’m gonna call you this from now on because it’s easier and I don’t want to put in the effort” it can feel as if they are choosing the name for a coworker, that isn’t their actual name, just because they can’t be arsed. And that’s just disrespectful. This doesn’t only count for difficult to pronounce names, but also nicknames.
I have an uncommon name, but I get annoyed when I send people emails, sign them with my name and they reply to me with the wrong name. That’s just wilful ignorance.
Honestly this is a valid opinion. I even have a perfect example of both sides.
My eighth grade class ostracized me for being the new kid, and one way they teased me was always pronouncing my name incorrectly. That is being deliberate and asshole behaviour.
A lot of my teachers, especially subs, pronounce my name incorrectly the first time. I correct them, and they simply try to remember until they 100% are getting it right. That’s just not knowing how to pronounce a name.
Signed, a Canadian with a Scottish name that has a silent letter.
Totally agree. My name gets mispronounced all the time and I just roll with it, unless it’s a situation where it really matters (like graduation when they’re announcing my name while I’m walking across the stage). But for run of the mill, hey good morning or whatever, it doesn’t bother me.
I have a very unique name spelling that’s got a very common pronunciation. I never expect anyone to say it right if they’ve never heard it said before. And before anyone asks, no it’s not a name that belongs on r/tragedeigh. It’s Gaelic.
But after I’ve told them how to pronounce it, if someone keeps saying it wrong on purpose I know they’re being malicious. And at that point I absolutely am allowed to complain about it.
I don’t see wanting your name said right is entitlement. That word gets thrown around a lot now a days totally out of context
If you insist on mispronouncing a name, you’re the asshole, not the person correcting you. Yeah, people should expect other people to make mistakes, but it is not wrong for them to correct you. Tell them you’ll do your best, and make a good faith effort.
The only exception is for something like their native language doesn’t have a sound; my best friend in jr. high school was from Thailand; he spoke perfect English, but his mother called me “Elics” instead of Eric because she couldn’t say the “r” sound (I’m not sure where the “s” at the end came from). This didn’t bother me, because I knew she wasn’t deliberately doing it.
lol my MIL has been saying my name wrong for years. My husband and I just laugh it off. And sometimes he jokingly calls me by her mispronounced version of my name.
Life is too short to care. Plus my mom gave me the odd spelling and pronunciation of an otherwise normal name, so people have called me anything but my actual name for years.
I worked with a woman named “Deborah”
It wasn’t pronounced “Debra,” or even “Deberah”
Straight up – “De-BOW-rah” and she made sure everyone knew that.
What kind of parent names their kid De-BOW-rah?
That’s like being named “Christopher” and being like “actually you pronounce the Ch like in the words ‘chips.’ My name is ‘Tristopher’.”
If they need to tell you more than once then it’s your fault for not listening.
If i may never speak to this person again, what do i care. However, if we work together, they’re gonna figure out how to say my name. There’s a line
At least you don’t have a name like Michael Bolton
When I was in high school one teacher called me Andrew the entire year. I never corrected him. I prefer the he not know who I was. What if I get in trouble? They will have a hell of a time finding Andrews parents.
It really depends. People mispronounce my last name all the time, and in a last name situation I’d answer to anything that sounds even remotely similar. But my first name is Maria, and I still remember that lady years ago who called me something unrecognisable instead and got pissed at me for not answering at once.
Doesn’t matter who it is, if they’ve been told what the name is and they choose not to just repeat it the way they were literally just told it as then that’s a choice they’re making.
And it’s a choice that shows their low intelligence or unwillingness to comprehend things outside of their own bubble of self importance
And I’m saying this as someone that has a very simple and common English name that white people fuck up constantly.
yeah I agree, people act as if someone is intentionally trying to offend them when they are just making a mistake.
Agreed. People have messed up my name my entire life, but, knowing that, I don’t expect anyone to get it right the first time. As long as you get the first syllable or so right, I probably won’t even notice other mispronunciations.
However, if I know someone well or see/interact with them often, and they continually mispronounce my name after correction, it does start to get frustrating.
Both my first and last names are mispronounced regularly. Don’t care abouty the last name because I can see why and there are several variations of it. But first name: I mean if my name were “Sam” I might get upset because wtf. But I can see the problem. You just gotta roll with it. For my first name though, I blame my parents for giving me the name knowing that it is both uncommon, not intuitive on pronunciation, and it was my father’s name. So dumb to have an uncommon name and yet it was my dad’s. I’ve thought about changing it but don’t have the mental energy to do it.
Agreed .. it’s really not that big of a deal!
I honestly thought that the difference between Sara and Sarah was only of spelling, and when the “ah” at the end was emphasised I thought it was just down to a difference in accents. So, as an American living in the UK, I’ve annoyed some Sara’s.
My name rhymes with a more common name and it was my biggest pet peeve.
“Hi I’m Macy.”
“Nice to meet you Tracy.”
Like this feels like you weren’t even really listening to me my guy.
I have a common short name, and the number of people who hear it, see it, and still get it wrong is boggling.
Think “thank you for calling XYZ insurance, this is Will speaking.”
“Hi, Eric…”
That’s not even close…
Yeah, I agree with you. It’s one thing if someone is obviously trying to disrespect you by mispronouncing your name on purpose, but random strangers and customer service workers are probably not trying to be rude. Let it go.
My name is always mispronounced and I usually dont care and usually dont correct them. What truly annoys me is “oH my goodddd that must happen alll the time thats sooo funny because i looked at your name and i thought it was__ but it isnt!” from every single person ever.
Not unpopular. Next
my brothers girlfriend has a common and easy to pronounce name. Despite this my grandmother who lives in our city and sees her semi regularly, continuously pronounces her name wrong. I really don’t think it’s being “whiny” when someone is constantly mispronouncing a name.
I have a gemstone name spelled the exact way as the gem and I’ve had it mispronounced a ton. I’m always more shocked than anything. I only get upset when they tell me it’s not my real name.
Everyone is entitled to their name, bob
I feel bad for the people with names on /r/tragedeigh. They’ll experience this every day.
I worked in dental for 8 years, and honestly? It’s very simple to say I’m calling about this patient, but I’m not sure of the pronnouncation. Tries my best then offers to spell it out. Obviously, I’m not talking to the named person half the time, but it’s pretty easy to just admit. idk what’s happening.
What isn’t ok is expecting people to just adopt a whole new name bc everyone is to lazy to learn the correct pronnouncation. I have so many islander friends that just go by “Mark” or whatever.
If you can pronounce Dostoevsky and Tchaikovsky, you can pronounce my name if you try a little bit.
I have a really basic, decently popular name. It’s in the top 400 for boys, and top 1k for girls. I’m a girl. The spelling is the girl version.
I’d say it’s more common than not that someone pronounces my name like an entirely different one. Like someone named Kaitlyn constantly being called Kaylee. Or a John being called Joanne. Or just adding extra syllables like “Kay-lee-eeee”
I’ve just given up and respond if it sounds vaguely like my name, but it’s also pretty irritating.
A close friend of mine says the wrong vowel sound. I hate it.
I get that there’s no reason for a complete stranger to automatically know how to pronounce my name right away, I really do, but it gets really old really fast having people constantly mispronouncing it.
I think you get a few tries but if someone corrects you multiple times and still you can’t grasp it then you’re either stupid or a dick
I complain because the mispronunciation literally just makes no sense. They pronounce a CH sound as CK. There is no room for confusion here????
Sorry cadet-nob-cheese. Did I pronounce it right?
I have a last name that I think is easy to say because it’s said exactly how it looks but people see the multiple Zs and over think it. i’ve just accepted that if the teacher or someone pauses and starts to stutter for my name that it’s probably me. unless they ask me if it’s correct I don’t correct them. I can’t say for first names though.
I don’t tell strangers my name that often anyways. However, if somebody mispronounces my name after I already corrected them, they are dead to me. I’m not going to react if they call my by my “name”, I’m not going to be nice. My face will tell them that they are close to death. It’s just disrespectful. My name is pretty common though and the way some people mispronounce it just makes it a different name – think Julia/Julie. It’s like in movies when the ex boyfriend intentionally doesn’t remember the new boyfriend’s name. It may seem minor but it says a lot
Yep. I used to be a fan of the band Magdalena Bay. Their lead singer is a woman named Mica Tennenbaum. 99% of people would look at her first name and say MIKE-uh, But no: she says it’s MEEK-uh.
I saw them live in 2022. One of their popular songs is about secrets, so they set up a voicemail where people would call in and reveal their secrets anonymously. The band would then play them back live at shows.
At my show, one of the secrets was “I have a massive crush on Mica”, which the caller said as “Mike-uh”. Mica literally stamped her foot and said “but my name is MEEEEEEEEEEKKK-UHHHHH!!!” like a damn 5 year-old.
It’s petty on both our parts, but I just couldn’t get over why she seemed so pissed about something that must happen to her 8 times a week.
The issue I have is when I have a foreign name but americans and brits anglicize it and ignore the way it’s properly pronounced.
I just tell strangers that I’ll never see again that my name is Mary. It’s not anywhere close to my actual (always mispronounced) name.
People I do interact with I’ll tell them my name, that it’s said like the (well known item) but spelled way different.
That helps, with the pronunciation anyway. The spelling still gets slaughtered. Hahahaha
My problem is when they are using the name as a sales tactic to create unfounded intimacy, and then pronounce it wrong. These same people use common nicknames without being asked to.
Sure, if a medical professional gets it wrong, I don’t care, we got the business done. But if a door to door window salesman thinks they are being cheeky by sneaking my name in the conversation to show how close we must be, I’m already annoyed at the tactic and I’m going to be more annoyed they can’t even do it right.
This is why I don’t say people’s names. I have a lisp and can’t produce some words even if I try like 100 times.
Had a gunnery sergeant in the marines whose last name was Richard. Dude would get so upset when anyone pronounced it “Rih-churd” instead of “Rih-shard”. Didn’t matter if it was your first time meeting him. If you were a lower rank, you got blasted lmao
Ya but the people who get all shitty about it after I politely correct them are the worst
I had a friend in middle school that was from another country, we were close all through uni. He introduced himself a certain way and then when we moved on to high school, he started introducing himself in a different way and told me that he had taught us the name wrong. Same thing happened in university. He was super angry that everyone said his name wrong
I was like…. Bro I would be on your side if you hadn’t literally told us how to pronounce it yourself. He goes by Ray now lol.
As for me, I have an easy Anglo name (Amanda) but I find people from other countries “mispronounce” my name. I personally don’t find it to be an issue but I also know that it’s not a micro aggression against me, it’s literally just an accent. My mother in law calls me Äminda, which is cute.
I don’t care about the barista or car service guy getting my very ethnic name right. But I worked with a dude for 8 years who consistently said it wrong. My name is not that hard. If you can say Daenerys Targaryen or Benedict Cumberbatch you can learn an ethnic name of someone you see every day.
I’ve had people ask me if I go by any nicknames. I tell them that I will only respond to my actual name or Her Most Exalted Excellency. They generally learn my name after that.
I don’t have a name that is hard to pronounce but people over the phone often think I’m saying “Wendy” when I’m not. I just let them call me Wendy. I was once working at a bank and a new girl had answered the phone and asked me if someone named Wendy worked there because someone was on the phone for her. I was like yeah, that’s me. She was very confused.
Call me whatever you want. We ain’t friends.
It’s actually the opposite really. Noone cares if a random customer service person gets it wrong. If someone you regularly interact with regularly and continually gets it wrong it’s likely because they are too entitled/can’t be bothered to learn it. It’s really just disrespectful. Most people who genuinely don’t believe they can pronounce it will go to a nickname/abbreviated name vs flat out calling you the wrong thing repeatedly
Conversely, as somebody with a name that is mispronounced ~50% of the time, it annoys me when people make a big deal about when they mispronounce MY name. Like “It’s , right?” “No, actually its ” “omg I’m SO SORRY!!!” Like bruh its fine, its not a big deal, lets move on
For like a cashier or a mechanic I’m going to just this once, I agree it’s a waste of time. For a teacher I’m going to have all semester? Or my coworkers? Those bitches can learn to say my name right.
My name was butchered so often and so much that it felt foreign to me by the time I turned 18 because everyone decided nicknames were easier so I just went by nicknames. My name was spelled so you could sound it out easily, it just had an apostrophe that made people act weird (which is funny bc the part people got wrong every time was the “key” part of my name, pronounced like the object and spelled like the object but the syllable before the apostrophe and the syllable after key were both always pronounced the same). When I’d correct people, I’d get “oh like [insert word that kinda sounds like my old name but absolutely wasn’t]” and then they’d just repeat that word and tease me with that word instead of saying my name.
Eventually I just changed my name but it just sucks that a can child spend so much of their life hating their name just because adults didn’t take the time to actually look and sound it out. Ime, people just never wanted to earnestly interact with my name so every mispronunciation was just like nails on a chalk board until I just gave it up entirely.
My name has a million spellings. If we’re talking customer service? I do not care how you spell it, im kinda curious what you pick.
If it’s legal or financial, anything business, be respectful and spell and say my name correctly. Accents are fine, not everyone pronounces all the letters the same way. Spelling my name wrong when responding to my business email is not ok.
Close friends and coworkers should know how to say your name. I think it’s fine to press that. I think it’s wrong to assume that it’s always just an honest mistake if someone routinely butchers your name, especially if it’s not very hard to pronounce. That’s definitely a sign of disrespect on some level.
As far as I’m concerned, someone who is this worked up about something so stupid and minor that they have to make a whole rant telling other people what they have to accept from others is the real loser here. Signed someone who doesn’t give a shit if people correct someone a thousand times because I have more interesting things to worry about
You sound entitled because you don’t wanna put in the effort to pronounce someone’s name correctly.
The whole time OP’s name is Steve.
I saw some comments about a scene where a character is trying to say a name. And she gets like Suhra instead of Sara, like that close. And it’s really really obvious that she cannot hear the difference in the vowel sounds.
And the comment thread was going off about how she was sooo rude. And I just thought “I bet you all think you’re saying Tchaikovsky correctly”