I came in a public bathroom and saw a dude speaking very loudly on a phone. Like real loud, he was on the verge of shouting. He’s not doing anything, just standing next to the sink and talking. And guess what? The phone is on speaker and the person from the other side is talking really loudly too. It was a bathroom in a library so I guess he went there to take his call.
Anyway, I enter a stall and I figure he will finish soon enough but it goes on and on, honestly, it was so loud, it was painfull. Normaly, in that type of situation, I would join in on the conversation, but they were talking in a foreign langage. So I do something else. After I’m done with my business, I go wash my hands just next to him and say loudly “Phew! Sorry for the smell, I TOOK A HUGE SHIT!” and leave.
Comments
Why are you cumming in public bathrooms?
Appropriate comment.
Just an idea for the next time.
As you probably have your mobile with you let it find out what they are speaking and say that in their language.
Thoroughly…very, very thoroughly…dry my hands using the dryer.
I would’ve blasted fart noises on my phone 💀
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Gym locker room, I’d just finished showering and gotten half-dressed. Some knucklehead came in on a video call with his girlfriend. I’m a tall, obese, pasty white, old dude. (With no sense of body shame) So I walked up behind him and said hello to his girlfriend, shirtless, and man-boobs perky.
Had a dude IN THE STALL, on the phone with someone. I kept flushing the urinal. Repeatedly, thinking no way they’ll be able to withstand that.
But they persevered. Sad.
Whenever someone is on the phone in the womens bathroom I absolutely made sure I farted strategically fart into the bowl so it echos loudest, and I suddenly had to poop too. Even if the person on the phone couldn’t hear me I hope the person on the phone was nervous they might have.
I have IBSD. I’ve never been happier to have it than when some idiot is on their cell on speaker in the john.
I will bring down the thunder.
We have a certain department that uses our employee bathroom at work, and mostly every single person is disgusting. They wash their lunch dishes in the sink, talk on the phone, and even FACETIME in the bathroom. If I’m in there at the same time one of them is, I make it my business to be as nasty and loud as I can – farting, exaggerated grunting/straining noises, and flushing as much as I possibly can. People are truly nasty.
You are the kind of asshole the world needs 🙂
Moan….The obscenity of another man moaning for another man to a listener who’s unsure what’s happening on the other end of the phone call is enough to make anyone want to quit life or at least hang up the fucking phone and vomit in the nearest trashcan
When the responses are even better than the op
Australian?
The next line in this conversation is the guy talking into his phone
(in a foreign language): “Oh I don’t know. Just some wanker I think?”
I was on the toilet at work. A coworker comes in and sits down in the stall next to me. His phone rings and he answers, “Sure, I can talk now.” Proceeds to have a 5 minute conversation about something that is not so important he couldn’t wait until he’s off the crapper. I’ve finished my business and rather annoyed at him so I repeatedly flush my toilet. It doesn’t phase him and he keeps talking. I wash my hands and use the hand dryer. This one is super loud. I finished drying my hands but kept the dryer running for at least an extra minute. I left the bathroom and 15 minutes later he comes up to my desk to complains that I was rude in the bathroom by making so much noise. I just shook my head and suggested he take his conversations outside of the bathroom next time. He had the nerve to complain to my boss who told him the same thing
When that happens, I like to pretend I am extremely constipated having extreme problems taking a shit, and it’s loud, very very loud.
Are you 8?
What did that do if they speak a foreign language?
Same but different… there was a very elderly lady on the train the other day, watching spongebob on her phone, absolute full volume no headphones. She did not care one bit.
Yell loudly “come back to bed darling, stop pretending”.
If there is one of those obnoxiously loud hand dryers I just stand there with my hands in it.
If you came in the bathroom while he was on speaker phone you didn’t even need to talk, unless you’re real quiet.
I’d pretend to be on the phone as a sub talking to my dom, with explicit details loudly.
My son and his friends did a similar prank when they were in high school. There was this nimrod (older guy) in the gym locker room who was at a bench facetiming with his wife or girlfriend or some such. It went on and on. Eventually my son and his friends started finding excuses to parade back and forth in his background….. as naked as the day they were born, of course.
I don’t think the guy ever took any calls again.
Well played! I don’t know why people don’t expect bathroom talk in a bathroom.
I flush non stop when that happens.
This happened to me multiple times in airports, so when they would start there call I’d grunt and start narrating my business, I was called rude a couple times and the caller left in a huff other times. I always had a good laugh
I will flush every 5 sec when someone is in there talking on the phone.
I was just finishing in the crapper one day at work, when a guy came in and sat down in the adjacent stall. 1/10 of a second before I flushed, I heard him on his phone: “Hi, sweetie, how’s your day going?”
*FLOOOOSH!*
Those industrial toilets in a room made entirely of tile and metal are SO loud!
We were in a store yesterday, and I went into the restroom. Two stalls, one was occupied, I could hear her talking on speaker phone, and “using” the toilet. She flushed, and left, without washing her hands. I was SO tempted to loudly say, “I hope you’re not preparing a meal for the guy you’re taking to,” so he’d know how disgusting she was. But… she was already out the door by the time I thought of it.
Has evolution struck already? People are physically unable to hold phones up to their ears?! I hate when people do this!!! It’s even worse when they take calls in their cars using their speakers on full blast with the door open.