Question about a friend who ignores me & talks about herself

r/

I have a friend, we met online but have also met once in person. She lives a couple hours from me. She is the type of person who texts daily. The problem I’ve seem to notice is sometimes she’ll tell me about her dating stories or her life etc. And what she’s doing. I try to give advice where it’s wanted, but sometimes I will say something about my day too. She just changes the topic. That’s fine since my comment didn’t warrant a reply, but other times she’ll ask me. I will say something pretty important to me and she’ll either change the topic or not reply til the next day and change the whole topic.

She does text me and ask for advice or tells me things. I thought I can do the same. I’m the type of person to acknowledge a text or what someone says. It’s odd because I don’t remember her always being this way. She will detail her days or stuff with her personal life and I reply. She used to reply when I said stuff about myself. But now she doesn’t. I recall once she was going through a hard time and I tried to support her through it. Recently when I talked about what I’m going through she just ignored it for a whole day and said “you over it?”

The only thing that was a bit iffy to me is a while ago when it was my birthday she did say happy birthday but I was talking about how I’m shopping for an outfit and she said that’s pointless no one dresses up and she’d never do that. Idk I may be in the wrong but it doesn’t feel like a friendship it feels like we just send each other a laundry list and don’t actually have a convo. I asked her about this and got no clear reply

Comments

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  2. PetrogradSwe Avatar

    Some people are like that. They’re interested in being seen, but not in seeing others back.

    You’ve already tried to bring this up with her and she doesn’t change.

    You’ll probably be better off if you dump or at least reduce interaction with this “friend” and spend your time on (or making) better friends instead.

  3. _Robot_toast_ Avatar

    If you’ve spoken to her about how you feel there is nothing else you can do to make her change. She might grow with time, but there’s no way of knowing. She does not sound like the kind of friend who would make for a good shoulder to cry on, but if you have other more reliable friends maybe you don’t need her to be.

    It’s up to you if you find her entertaining enough to keep around despite her flaw. It also doesn’t have to be all or nothing, it’s ok to keep talking to her but prioritize other friendships or day to day life.

  4. Direct_Bad459 Avatar

    She sounds like not a great friend. I would prioritize other relationships