this is tough. my first thought would be, if it was an accident, to attempt to help him. but knowing him he wouldn’t even ask for me to help, he would tell me and then turn himself in and I would try to get him to cover it up so he wouldn’t leave me
That very much depends on how they did it. Was it with a weapon and are they still holding it? Is it a melee weapon or a firearm? If a firearm then I’ll do as I’m told until I can get away. If it’s melee and I have something within arm reach to whack her with and run then I ain’t helping her with shit.
Either way I’m calling the police the first chance I get because I ain’t doing time for someone else.
My husband is genuinely the sweetest man I’ve ever met so the options are a.) It was a freak accident or self defense, I would help him cover it up. Or b.) he’s having a psychotic break, in which case I would report it so he could receive treatment.
My ex husband….sigh…I would put on my best face of makeup, fix my hair into a heap of 60s grieving widow curls, pull out the boxy red film noir dress I have been holding onto for twenty years….and take my faux tortured self down to the police station to turn him in. While dabbing at my non existent tears with a white hanky. Then I would give press interviews for a fee and talk about how I knew he had a dark side but was terrified to leave for fear he would kill me.
Which the second half would be true I suppose. But after surviving the hell he put me through I figure I should get some amusement on his behalf considering I have spent 3 years thus far digging myself out of the emotional and financial pit his alcoholism and gambling he put me and the kids into.
I suppose if I had a decent partner who was otherwise a “good person” and that I still thought loved me after 5 years or more…as long as it wasn’t an elderly person, a child, or a woman then I guess I would just pop a couple Valium and start digging a hole in the middle of some forest. I don’t think I could deal with a dead body so he would have to do all that.
But, I can dig a hole quickly and efficiently. I dug a 16 foot wide 5 foot deep hole with a 6$ shovel from Family Dollar for my pool last summer. In 2 days with a lot of breaks in between digging. I had a giant pile of rocks because my yard is so full of them. But it was enough rocks that I paved over the dirt floor with the rocks before laying tarp and padding down to set the pool onto them. The rocks were the only thing that really it made it a pain in the ass. But the size, I guess that’s probably equivalent to 4 or more gravesites. I never understood why people dump murdered humans into shallow graves and expect them to stay hidden forever and to never be caught. I even bury pets at least 5 feet down so bobcats and coyotes can’t dig them back up. But maybe I just love digging holes.
Whilst morally and ethically I couldn’t murder someone — I’d likely be shocked and want an explanation for this — if I felt sympathy and care after the story and could understand their motive; yeah! I could see myself helping them! I’d probably do a better job than them as well! Most murderers slip up out of fear or anxiety! If I was just the accessory after the fact I’d be more logical and less emotional about the situation.
Just for fun—here’s my “list” let me know if you think it would work out irl — not that I’m going to 😆
No internet. No googling anything about murder at all. Google nice things instead. No 1st time murderer would google a generic bunch of shit-post searches! Maybe look up some odd, but legal porn terms—if you get asked questions later; that’s why you are nervous 😬 😉—pervert; maybe. Murderer; nope!
If there is no immediate reason to get rid of the body fast—maybe there isn’t any knock on the door, or investigation. Then the timeline changes: body gets frozen; so time of death won’t be as accurate. But not frozen in a place where it will get found. After about 48 hours. Take it out. Wrap it up. No fingerprints, no DNA.
Body needs dealing with. Head, hands are removed, teeth mashed up as well.
Disposal of body. It has to go more than 6ft, but definitely not in our garden. No-where local, no cars, avoid people, no door cams, no dash cams, no CCTV. Buried preferably with a animal carcass above (for a false positive if a dog sniffs around)
If there’s a dumpster that’s due a collection corpse goes in there. It should be dismembered in a few bags and wrapped securely so no one sees it. Spray air freshener and flowers inside to sweeten it up a bit. No suspicious look of a “body bag” when it’s in landfill it’s gone! No one is ever digging it out!
DNA evidence; bleach and deep cleaning; then after it’s spotless and thoroughly walk around in outside boots to make it less than “too-perfect” which is suspicious.
Mobile phone—assuming the cadaver had it on them. Fake a social post (use dead guys face to try and unlock phone first) write a post that sounds like they have a lot going on; make it vague; running away, mental health crisis—don’t damage the phone. Leave the phone switched on and post it in a far away (+10 miles) letterbox—it’ll hit multiple phone masts on its journey; try an international postal address; somewhere remote— it’ll likely be opened “stolen” and sold! And all the while it’s leaving a nice digital trail—the phone you posted will never tell the story!
Time to get the story straight. What did we do? Something bland. Put a box-set on streaming site while you’re sorting out the murder-aftermath ASAP. Any digital records will show that it was just a quiet night in watching a mega-marathon of a series! Make it one you know by heart! Then it’s familiar if questions get asked about it! Google an actor mid-way through (looking up a actor isn’t a murderers MO)
After the crime scene looks visually clean and clear; order a pizza! Make sure your spouse pays for it and engages in chit-chat! The delivery driver gets a big tip! Biggest tip of the evening; he’ll remember your spouse—and a nicer tipper isn’t a murderer—no one in their right mind orders a pizza 🍕 with a body in the house; 😉—do they?
Hardest part. Spouse guilt. Try and keep them safe from themselves. The urge to confess; or the fear of being caught will make them make sloppy decisions that compromise you both—emphasise that you are both involved now—try and make them feel better about the murder; justifying it, or disparaging the victim… they hopefully won’t have the urge to confess their crime. Make sure they never google the victim—no looking up anything to do with them. Don’t follow the investigation in any traceable way. If people mention the person has gone missing; be casually uninformed, disinterested and ignorant of it all—confuse the victim with someone of a similar name, or appearance—that’s how well you knew them! After a while the story becomes a missing person case
depends why they killed them, who they killed, and if the person they killed has kids or has a certain family. i’d try to dig into the persons past (the victim) and then probably decide from there
Ask what he did step by step in great detail to see if there’s to much evidence to waste time harvesting the organs, then dispose of the main indefiying body parts and clean up as he does the heavy work and helps dispose of the body itself.
I’d help him no questions asked, except for the pertinent “Why the fuck didn’t you wait for me to be able to help you do this? When else am I ever going to have the chance to commit murder?”
Suppose I should space out my searches and purchases starting now to prepare for such and event? Better hope there is a good freaking reason for putting me in such a damn position!
Comments
I don’t think i would have a choice.
this is tough. my first thought would be, if it was an accident, to attempt to help him. but knowing him he wouldn’t even ask for me to help, he would tell me and then turn himself in and I would try to get him to cover it up so he wouldn’t leave me
It depends who he killed and why.
id be shocked at first a little scared due to a new power dynamic buut id help them with the body ie sell the organs to the black market for a pay day
That very much depends on how they did it. Was it with a weapon and are they still holding it? Is it a melee weapon or a firearm? If a firearm then I’ll do as I’m told until I can get away. If it’s melee and I have something within arm reach to whack her with and run then I ain’t helping her with shit.
Either way I’m calling the police the first chance I get because I ain’t doing time for someone else.
>my partner didn’t kill anyone btw
This just makes me think that you were the one who killed someone and asked this here to have an idea of how your partner will react lmao
But if my bf asked me, I’d help him hide the body first and ask questions later. That man wouldn’t even hurt a fly without a good reason to.
I wouldn’t help and I would tell them I don’t know what they’re talking about, and I didn’t see anything.
My husband is genuinely the sweetest man I’ve ever met so the options are a.) It was a freak accident or self defense, I would help him cover it up. Or b.) he’s having a psychotic break, in which case I would report it so he could receive treatment.
Ride or die, I’m an accomplice now
I’d be very happy to turn him in so they can lock his ass up.
I’d be down.
I’d grab a shovel and some gloves
Depends….what was the reason for the murder??
My ex husband….sigh…I would put on my best face of makeup, fix my hair into a heap of 60s grieving widow curls, pull out the boxy red film noir dress I have been holding onto for twenty years….and take my faux tortured self down to the police station to turn him in. While dabbing at my non existent tears with a white hanky. Then I would give press interviews for a fee and talk about how I knew he had a dark side but was terrified to leave for fear he would kill me.
Which the second half would be true I suppose. But after surviving the hell he put me through I figure I should get some amusement on his behalf considering I have spent 3 years thus far digging myself out of the emotional and financial pit his alcoholism and gambling he put me and the kids into.
I suppose if I had a decent partner who was otherwise a “good person” and that I still thought loved me after 5 years or more…as long as it wasn’t an elderly person, a child, or a woman then I guess I would just pop a couple Valium and start digging a hole in the middle of some forest. I don’t think I could deal with a dead body so he would have to do all that.
But, I can dig a hole quickly and efficiently. I dug a 16 foot wide 5 foot deep hole with a 6$ shovel from Family Dollar for my pool last summer. In 2 days with a lot of breaks in between digging. I had a giant pile of rocks because my yard is so full of them. But it was enough rocks that I paved over the dirt floor with the rocks before laying tarp and padding down to set the pool onto them. The rocks were the only thing that really it made it a pain in the ass. But the size, I guess that’s probably equivalent to 4 or more gravesites. I never understood why people dump murdered humans into shallow graves and expect them to stay hidden forever and to never be caught. I even bury pets at least 5 feet down so bobcats and coyotes can’t dig them back up. But maybe I just love digging holes.
Whilst morally and ethically I couldn’t murder someone — I’d likely be shocked and want an explanation for this — if I felt sympathy and care after the story and could understand their motive; yeah! I could see myself helping them! I’d probably do a better job than them as well! Most murderers slip up out of fear or anxiety! If I was just the accessory after the fact I’d be more logical and less emotional about the situation.
Just for fun—here’s my “list” let me know if you think it would work out irl — not that I’m going to 😆
No internet. No googling anything about murder at all. Google nice things instead. No 1st time murderer would google a generic bunch of shit-post searches! Maybe look up some odd, but legal porn terms—if you get asked questions later; that’s why you are nervous 😬 😉—pervert; maybe. Murderer; nope!
If there is no immediate reason to get rid of the body fast—maybe there isn’t any knock on the door, or investigation. Then the timeline changes: body gets frozen; so time of death won’t be as accurate. But not frozen in a place where it will get found. After about 48 hours. Take it out. Wrap it up. No fingerprints, no DNA.
Body needs dealing with. Head, hands are removed, teeth mashed up as well.
Disposal of body. It has to go more than 6ft, but definitely not in our garden. No-where local, no cars, avoid people, no door cams, no dash cams, no CCTV. Buried preferably with a animal carcass above (for a false positive if a dog sniffs around)
If there’s a dumpster that’s due a collection corpse goes in there. It should be dismembered in a few bags and wrapped securely so no one sees it. Spray air freshener and flowers inside to sweeten it up a bit. No suspicious look of a “body bag” when it’s in landfill it’s gone! No one is ever digging it out!
DNA evidence; bleach and deep cleaning; then after it’s spotless and thoroughly walk around in outside boots to make it less than “too-perfect” which is suspicious.
Mobile phone—assuming the cadaver had it on them. Fake a social post (use dead guys face to try and unlock phone first) write a post that sounds like they have a lot going on; make it vague; running away, mental health crisis—don’t damage the phone. Leave the phone switched on and post it in a far away (+10 miles) letterbox—it’ll hit multiple phone masts on its journey; try an international postal address; somewhere remote— it’ll likely be opened “stolen” and sold! And all the while it’s leaving a nice digital trail—the phone you posted will never tell the story!
Time to get the story straight. What did we do? Something bland. Put a box-set on streaming site while you’re sorting out the murder-aftermath ASAP. Any digital records will show that it was just a quiet night in watching a mega-marathon of a series! Make it one you know by heart! Then it’s familiar if questions get asked about it! Google an actor mid-way through (looking up a actor isn’t a murderers MO)
After the crime scene looks visually clean and clear; order a pizza! Make sure your spouse pays for it and engages in chit-chat! The delivery driver gets a big tip! Biggest tip of the evening; he’ll remember your spouse—and a nicer tipper isn’t a murderer—no one in their right mind orders a pizza 🍕 with a body in the house; 😉—do they?
Hardest part. Spouse guilt. Try and keep them safe from themselves. The urge to confess; or the fear of being caught will make them make sloppy decisions that compromise you both—emphasise that you are both involved now—try and make them feel better about the murder; justifying it, or disparaging the victim… they hopefully won’t have the urge to confess their crime. Make sure they never google the victim—no looking up anything to do with them. Don’t follow the investigation in any traceable way. If people mention the person has gone missing; be casually uninformed, disinterested and ignorant of it all—confuse the victim with someone of a similar name, or appearance—that’s how well you knew them! After a while the story becomes a missing person case
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depends why they killed them, who they killed, and if the person they killed has kids or has a certain family. i’d try to dig into the persons past (the victim) and then probably decide from there
Realistically? This answer changes on a lot of factors. I couldn’t say how I’d react in any given moment given every factor involved in a scenario.
I’ve watched enough movies. I know there’s scenarios this might be a “ride or die” thing. But usually not, and probably not most of the time.
My husband knows I find bodies off putting on a good day. I’d be useless.
As long as I can I sneak a bite to cross that off my bucket list.
Ask what he did step by step in great detail to see if there’s to much evidence to waste time harvesting the organs, then dispose of the main indefiying body parts and clean up as he does the heavy work and helps dispose of the body itself.
Maybe yes maybe no. Depends on who it was and what exactly Happened.
If there was a reward for info I’d snitch. Gotta put numero uno first
I have no idea what you’re talking about.
I’d kill them
Probably turn them in in case I’m next 😭💀
I’d help him no questions asked, except for the pertinent “Why the fuck didn’t you wait for me to be able to help you do this? When else am I ever going to have the chance to commit murder?”
How long have the two of you been broken up, if it’s not too much to ask?
I ain’t going to jail for NOBODY!
Id be confused, since I don’t have a partner 😂
Nah man, I’d have a lot of questions, and I bet police would too.
Like “do you have two shovels?” And “where do you wanna burry it” and police would ask “have you seen this person” and “any idea where they could be?”
Probably
Suppose I should space out my searches and purchases starting now to prepare for such and event? Better hope there is a good freaking reason for putting me in such a damn position!