I have a lot of complicated emotions tied up with sex. Without going into detail I was taken advantage of at a young age which led me to be very promiscuous in my teenage years
I have worked so hard to have some normalcy around sex. I worked with a therapist to release all the negative emotions I still tied with sex
Even after all that work and although I’ve healed tremendously from my past, sex is so damn complicated
I would say I have a pretty low sex drive. I think I could live the rest of my life without sex and I’ll be okay. But I also want to feel sexy and be a more sexual being
This year I made amazing friends who helped me step more into my sexuality. Most by reading romance books which helped a lot
I recently got aroused which is rare for me so I was excited to get some sexy time in with my husband. I was left so confused because although I was aroused before, it didn’t transfer it sex.
I wouldn’t trade my husband for anything. He is so compassionate and patient with me. I’ve been wanting to explore more in the bedroom. Figure out what gets me going or what I don’t like. He never rushes me or makes me feel to complicated in the bedroom. He stops when I get overwhelmed and ask if I would like to continue or keep discovering. He gets so excited when I try to take my power around sex back. I’m really glad I ended up with a man who’s so patient with me.
Comments
It’s pretty amazing how much strength it takes to work through all that and still find ways to connect with someone who really gets you, I mean, not everyone has a partner who’s so patient and supportive, that’s gotta be rare. You’re doing better than most people think, and it shows how far you’ve come, even if it doesn’t always feel like it right now… Just know, you’re not alone in this.