I (27M) have been with my gf (28F) for just over a year now. We have done quite a lot together like travel, met each others friends, family (in person and virtually), and are quite involved in each others lives. Lately, in the past 4-6 months we’ve been barely had any sex. I’m talking approximately only 2 or 3 times in 2025. There has been other oral forms, but even this is like once every 2-3 weeks. Prior to the recent 4-6 months, it was limited, around 1-3 times per fortnight AT most if lucky. I’m generally not someone with a high sex drive, but I was in a short term relationship where there were times we would’ve done it 4 times in a day, and on average atleast 3-5 times minimum per week. Now in my current relationship, it is once every 5-6 weeks.
I have talked to her about the lack of intimacy and intercourse, she says that she doesn’t feel comfortable doing more because of the living situation, as she is currently house sharing, with in a sectioned off studio.
I don’t think this is the reason, and it is just an excuse to not have any intercourse.
I don’t see myself being in a long term relationship/life partner/marriage in a sexless situation.
What would you do?
– I’ve tried talking about it, gets to nowhere
– I don’t want to hurt her by leaving her
Comments
If your needs aren’t being met, it’s okay to end things. You tried to mention it. You are only human
Leave dude not worth it and won’t get any better
Does she just have problems with penetration? Or are they general libido problems? Have you suggested that you do something other than vaginal intercourse?
It sounds like this is a deal breaker for you. Intimacy is important and if it’s kind of sliding off, I think that’s telling that a relationship may be waning a bit. Think of it like this, if you keep this up for let’s say the next 6 or 7 years and it’s like this the or worse, would you be satisfied? Would your gf? If the answer is yes, keep having a relationship, if not then you know what you need to do.
Coming from someone in a sexless marriage for 3 years now, break up. Find someone who aligns with you.
It’s your choice.. do you want a roommate or do you want a fulfilling sex life ??
I had this problem with an ex partner. It’ll only get worse, the excuses will change and there’ll be another reason next why she doesn’t feel like doing it. Leave and find someone who matches your libido.
My friend enjoys sex 3 times a year on A B C dates (anniversary, birthday, Christmas). And that’s if he’s lucky!
Hes 60.
It’s not going to get better with time. So either stay or leave with that information
move on either she getting more elsewhere or you will be lacking for a long time. or have a open relationship you get more she get less and everyone happy
It’s ok to leave someone that doesn’t match with you sexually. It will be a lifelong struggle if you decide to stay.
You should not have sexual relations before marriage.