Alright Reddit, I [M28] need your collective wisdom.
There’s this girl [F26] — let’s call her Apple. She’s from Ireland. I’m not. We met through work [3 Months ago ], hit it off as colleagues, and slowly started talking more. Friendly chats turned into banter, and over time, I became one of her “go-to people.”
Now here’s where it gets confusing:
On St. Patrick’s Day, she got drunk (I was sober), and she kissed me — full Bollywood moment minus the rain. It was unexpected, and honestly, I froze. I don’t have much experience in these situations… so I just let it pass without making a big deal.
Fast forward a few days near Wednesday before Easter, we’re around a group of co-workers, and suddenly she pulls me in for a strong side hug and loudly calls me her “best friend” in front of everyone — with that warm, glowing smile. My brain short-circuited a bit right there.
Now, she’s invited me to another group drinking night, and I’m not sure what I’m walking into.
I don’t drink — personal and cultural reasons — but I don’t mind being around others who do. The thing is… I don’t know if this is a friends-only hangout, or if she’s slowly checking if there’s something more here.
And here’s the kicker: I’m not the guy with tons of dating experience. I’m emotionally mature but socially underexposed in this department, if that makes sense. So I’m second-guessing myself a lot.
So Reddit, please help:
Do I go and just take things as they come?
Or do I avoid potentially complicating something that’s already hard to define?
What would you do if you were me?
Brutal honesty or wholesome advice — bring it on. I genuinely don’t know what’s happening here.
Comments
Honestly bro go for it man. It seems confusing cuz she said best friend but that kiss and holding you close means something man if you weigh the physical affection over verbal she is definitely into you man. Don’t worry about work love will last longer and provide more than any job could.
Hahaha I laughed reading this. “Full Bollywood minus the rain.”
The answer really depends on how you feel about her — do you like her?
If you do, you can show her how much you care.
If not, you can either step back, or stay friends while accepting that you’re not expecting anything more.
But from what I read, it seems like you’re actually interested, you’re just afraid of hoping for more in case the feelings aren’t mutual — and in the end, it might just hurt you.
You’re also afraid of being friendzoned or stuck in a situationship, and you’re not very good at handling that kind of situation because you do not have much experience with it.
What you’re feeling is actually valid.
And of course, it’s not like you can ask for clarity or certainty either — you just met, right? Hahaha.
Enjoy the learning experience.