The other day my husband was working out of town and my daughter and I decided it was the perfect time to go shopping for his birthday, since it’s Monday. We got him a new rod and reel, fishing bait, weights and hooks. As well as some outfits for our upcoming trip in august. Well today we were driving around in my car, and I stupidly forgot to take out the rod and reel. 🤦🏻♀️ he sees it and is kind of going on about it, “I only had two poles in here, where did the extra one come from” so finally I said, “it’s part of your birthday gift, alright!” Day goes on …. We get home and are unloading things. I ask him, “did you look at your new set up?” His response, “not really, but I’m probably going to just return it when you give it to me”. 😲💔 I’m like, “are you serious? That hurts my feelings” and then we just walked inside and that was that. Well, my feelings are most certainly hurt. But tomorrow the first thing I want to do is go back to sportsmen’s and go spend the money on myself. Idk. What would you do?
Should I?
r/Advice
Comments
That is terrible from him. It’s a gift he should be grateful for
It’s probably not the rod he wanted. It would have been kind of him to not make you aware of that truth though. White lies are okay. People don’t realize how much honesty can cut sometimes.
You didn’t just buy him a gift, you put thought, love, and time into something for him. And instead of appreciation, you got dismissed. That kind of moment sticks. You’re not petty for wanting to take that love back, you’re human. Spend that money on you. You deserve to feel valued, too.
That’s a dick move on his part, but also maybe the intent was good but lacking his knowledge?
I would suggest letting him know his response hurt and asking why he would return it. My wife gets me things she knows I will use, or neat things that fit me, but asks what hobby stuff to get. I know I wouldn’t get the “right” stuff for someone who regularly fishes.
That sounds really insensitive. Trying to make someone feel bad through your actions usually doesn’t end in the way you want it to…maybe just be open with him and tell him how it made you feel?
Take it back n spend the money on u
Ok…Right IF he did say that then yeah thats not a good way to put it….
In defense…and it probably wont be popular, and I’m ok with that, but sporting equipment is not something that you go buy for an enthusiast….yes, the thought is nice but unless you know the latest amd greatest and are as into the sport as he, one should never buy that stuff for someone that is good at and likes their equipment….its just a bad idea.
It would be like being an expert baker and someone buying a cake for them from the grocery store and say “here is a cake, I know that you like to bake”
Items for very specific hobbies should be given as gift cards unless you too are in the hobby
You will be wrong 99% of the time if you have no idea what you’re getting.
Not the best reaction but a very avoidable situation
Talk to him. Maybe he is distant, do you suspect something else…? His respond is weird
Maybe find out what he wanted for his birthday instead of something he has no need for. You get angry at your man for not spending time figuring out what he wants. It’s not his fault you got him the wrong present
I know (following 38 years of fishing with my man) to take him to lunch followed by a trip to Bass Pro Shop on his birthday…rod, reel, pole, line are his personal choices.
Sorry about your husband hurting your feelings. As a woman who fishes, a fishing rod and reel are like buying you a bra. You need to buy to suit the application. The way it moves and feels makes a big difference in the experience.