I know this isnt a relationship sub but I feel most safe here, I’ve been having issues with my husband for a while now, I want to leave but I don’t know when I should mention a divorce,
I know this isnt a relationship sub but I feel most safe here, I’ve been having issues with my husband for a while now, I want to leave but I don’t know when I should mention a divorce,
Comments
Why even go to couples therapy if you’re already decided? Either give the therapy an honest try, or just ask for the divorce.
Couples therapy is trying to sort things out…..if you are set on divorce why are you attempting/scheduling/going to couples therapy.
If you refuse to give couples therapy a chance, do it before. Don’t waste your time or anyone else’s with therapy that you won’t fully participate in.
Or wait, and give therapy 110% and then decide.
This depends on your safety and some other factors.
If what you want from couples therapy is to help you negotiate and navigate the end of this relationship, I’d be really clear about that. A couples therapist can be really supportive with that work.
If you’re feeling unsafe, physically or financially, I think the advice would be very different.
Ignore the other comments.
Going to couples therapy can be useful to separate your lives, and to iron out things like co-parenting and harmful communication styles.
Going to couples therapy is NOT a commitment to work on staying married.
However, the most important thing is to be safe. If you feel it will be safer to inform him with the therapist there, that is your prerogative, though it would be better to do it sooner rather than later.
Either way, the most important thing is to stay safe.
You should ask for a divorce once you’ve spoken to an attorney and assessed all your options.
You should only ask for a divorce once you have your path out made. That includes talking to a lawyer.
My mom is a couples therapist. Often her job is to help them navigate the divorce process, not save the marriage. Unfortunately people don’t seek help until it’s WAY too far gone.
If your mind is made up get that in order with an attorney before you navigate the end of your marriage in therapy.