I (29M) have this friend (28F) that I’ve known online for years. We’ve played games together and talked a lot on Discord. Recently, we’ve started talking even more, and I developed feelings for her, so I told her. Now, we’re online dating. She wants to come visit me at my place next month since it’s her vacation, and spend a week here. The thing is, I never kissed before. Should I tell her that or try to hide it?
Should I Tell Her, I’ve Never Kissed Before?
r/Advice
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HONESTY! Tell her and make it fun, she gets to teach you how to kiss exactly the way she likes! How fun!
I mean, everyone has their first time eventually! Why not make it memorable? Just imagine the look on her face when she finds out you’re a total kiss-virgin—priceless!
Do not tell her
I’m so excited for you!!!! This is big! I am internally jumping up and down for you!! You must be nervous as hell.
That’s a hard decision. Honesty can help relieve the tension/pressure for you but also removes the spontaneity that you might want in a first kiss. And it might be embarrassing to you. Although it shouldn’t be, that’s easier said than done. If my partner told me that I would be her first kiss, I would be so flattered and excited. She gets to be your first kiss! That is so cool for her!!
Are you leaning one way or the other? Do you think it would be easier to tell her before you are actually in person together? Maybe online so she can learn your little secret beforehand? Give it time to settle and not seem so fresh when she gets there?
Do tell her, actually.
If she’s experienced, she’ll just think you’re a bad kisser, unless you’re a natural talent. That’s likely where things will start, lol, so that constitutes a first impression.
Nothing wrong with being honest. She’ll probably be giddy about it.
Do not listen to these people that are saying you should tell her. Under no circumstances should you admit this. Never in a million years. This isn’t even an option for you. You’re 29 years old, she will definitely think a lot less of you. And you can’t afford that. She will lose respect for you and you might lose her completely. Just learn a little about kissing. Plus maybe she doesn’t like using tongue so you’re completely in the clear. If she starts using tongue just follow her lead and don’t over do it, just do what she does. Relax, it’s not hard.
You don’t have to tell her. But if you want to then you can. I never told anyone they were my first anything because especially as a woman some guys either get really weird and don’t want to then bc they think it’s special or, they take some weird pride in it.
Your first time can mean whatever you want it to. If you want to share it as a special moment, then tell her. If you think it’s not that special or don’t want to play it up, maybe don’t say. But either way is fine.
And personally as a woman I wouldn’t care at all if I’m someone’s first kiss, in terms of like making fun of them or something. I’d think it’s sweet. But it also does lead to other questions like why and such as you get older. Especially if you’ve wanted to kiss someone and never got the chance. It can eventually make you look like you’re behind socially. It really depends on if you’re awkward about it or not. She already likes you so it’s hard to think that this would ruin it. But if I was worried about it I wouldn’t say personally. But as others said too If you kiss poorly she may think you just suck at kissing so maybe it’s not bad to bring up at some point idk.
Do not tell her. If you do kiss her, just kiss her very softly a few times in a row. If she wants more, she will increase the kissing action, and you respond in the same way. Don’t get aggressive!
If you feel up to it, tell her. If not, don’t worry about it. I (33F) had my first kiss at 33, the same night I lost my virginity. I was more worried about the latter so I told the man I was with about me being a virgin and he took it very well! I actually recently told him he was my first kiss (we’ve been dating for almost a year) and he was shocked!
Fake it ‘till you make it.
She will know…lol
Idk why so many comments here are freaking out like telling her will bring about Ragnarok or something. You can totally tell her if you need to. “I’m nervous, I don’t have much experience with any of this” is really not a big deal to regular people. It will be fine
Do not tell her online for sure. If to tell her in person, that depends… if you can muster the courage to kiss her, then just dont. If you need her aid in that, discuss it then, but not any sooner than necessary