Pride- or being Proud of something- is, in its definition, a feeling of accomplishment.
whenever you get a good grade on a Test, you feel Proud. whenever you run a marathon, you feel Proud. whenever you finish a passion project, you feel Proud.
You cannot be proud of things that you yourself did not achieve.
Not your race, heritage, nationality, sex, or whatever identity you define yourself with.
You did nothing to be born the way you are.
History has shown that pride in identities can be dangerous.
Nationalism (or National pride) has fueled wars and genocides since the first instances of recoded history.
Racial pride has led to supremacist mindsets that caused unthinkable suffering across the world.
Identity-based pride leads to division, resentment, and polarization. Instead of bringing people together, it reinforces the “us vs. them” mentality that keeps humanity locked in endless conflict.
Even being proud of someone else does not make sense to me.
for Example, if you’re ‘proud’ of your Friend for achieving something- is what you’re feeling actually pride?
Pride is when you stand Tall with a straight back and puffed out chest, knowing that “yeah, i just did that.”- while pride in the context of being proud of someone else is more like an empathetic happiness of “I just knew you could do it!”.
For me, its not the same.
Looking forward to your input 🙂
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I can be proud of the accomplishments of my friends and family.
Simply because your post chooses to limit "true" pride to things you yourself accomplished, and specifically exclude pride in others, doesn’t make it so.
I like your thought process! I 100% agree with the sentiment, it’s only the word "achieve" that was slightly problematic for me. However I looked up the definition and I believe I’m the one who needs to adjust my thinking.
Definition: successfully bring about or reach (a desired objective, level, or result) by effort, skill, or courage.
I was struggling with the concept of what if you don’t reach your intended goal or land at a logical end point, then what? But the addition of courage in the definition of achieve, I believe covers it. Just by having the courage to try something you are afraid to do, regardless of the outcome, you have achieved something and therefore can have (and should have) pride.
Minorities are proud as a "fuck you" to people who tell them to be ashamed of it. The Us vs Them mentality already exists. Is it fighting fire with fire? Maybe. But how are you going to argue you deserve water if all anyone hears is about how you deserve to burn?
“Pride” as a minority demographic (whether black, gay, whatever) is used as the opposite of shame, and is a response to discrimination and marginalization. It’s saying “I’m not going to feel ashamed for being black” or “I’m not going to feel lesser for being gay.”
Pride has multiple definitions, and if you look past the first one, you’ll see that a secondary usage is “consciousness of one’s own dignity.”
You’re creating a straw man by pretending that minority pride is about accomplishment; no one is suggesting it is. It’s about having dignity in the face of bigotry and oppression and refusing to feel ashamed for who you are.
I feel like humans collectively become super lazy around the word "proud". It’s definitely a different feeling when you’re "proud" to be of some nationality, "proud of someone and proud because of you achievemnt, which is hugely fueled by sense of fulfilment
Honestly this whole post sounds like you want to just tear people down for things they’re proud if ie nationality, race etc. Why do you want a big boring world of bland. I like people having pride in their nationality and heritage . The maori doing the Haka, native Hawaiins keeping their traditions alive. Let people have pride in what they want, provided it doesn’t put others down
Absolutely they should.
Pride comes in many different forms and from many different results or actions.
Examples of incredible pride I have felt in the past 20 years-29 years (my oldest child is 29)
Whenever a child (of mine) accomplishes something that took a lot of effort, was a difficult accomplishment, the actions to succeed were not easy and took continued and consistent effort. Probably the greatest PRIDE I have ever felt was through my children’s actions.
The level of Pride that I felt on behalf of our country when we elected Obama (not because of ideological agreement), a Black person to the highest office in our country, showing how far society has come and evolved to focus on merit over insignificant factors gave a tremendous sense of pride.
While I have personally accomplished many wonderful things in my life (business, personal, financial, physical), I can say that the greatest levels of pride that I have ever felt have been in other (typically children, family, friend, colleague) people’s exceptional accomplishments.
My greatest sense of pride for my own personal accomplishment has literally been the ability to actually mature in to a real adult – career, family, financial responsibility and the recognition and understanding that my outcomes in life are the direct byproduct of my inputs and decisions in life – just like for everybody else. It took me a long time to recognize this reality – it is the thing I am most proud of.
I don’t agree. There is no problem with pride in identity per se. I’m Dutch for example. I am proud that my ancestors managed to survive for so long and came out independent in the end. We have the UK north of us, France south of us, Germany east of us. It’s a damn miracle we managed to make it somehow.
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I completely agree with this. If most of your identity is wrapped in sexuality, race, or religion then that will eventually fail. Self worth is from accomplishments and growing in tough times but still achieving personal goals.
People do need to worry about their own lives more than whatever point is going on in social media. Social media actually gives 0. I’m a Xinneial and have watched it happen.
Yes and no. There’s a certain amount of pride you should have in your family, your inheritance, and your nation as a form of gratitude for your ancestors getting you here (Honor thy Mother & Father). That being said, pride in these unearned areas should be constrained as gratitude and honor and not a sense of ego or nobility.
As for pride in accomplishments and successes, be wary. If your pride comes from your accomplishments, then anyone belittling your successes will make you bitter; anyone eclipsing your successes will make you envious, and anyone undoing your successes will make you wrathful. It’s good to take pride in your accomplishments, but makes sure it’s a fleeting pride and not part of your identity permanently.
>Not your race, heritage, nationality, sex, or whatever identity you define yourself with.
My counter point would be: if you actively partake in any of the above you help shape/maintain the thing so you are allowed to feel proud of its achievements.
Like parents being proud of a child’s performance because they raised the kid and gave it the opportunities to improve etc.
Or being proud of your country if you live there, work there, pay taxes there, vote etc. If you live its ideals.
I agree that some pride is stupid as you literally did nothing. Like bragging about a win of a team you’re a fan of.
Or pride that goes beyond that demeaning others labelling them as inferior etc.
Choose your answer:
Yes. When I am proud of myself, it makes me smile, do a little happy dance and share my good news. I feel the same when someone I love accomplishes something. I call it pride.
No. Pride is a result of ego and attachment. It’s pretty well proven that those things usually lead to deep unhappiness, they are a trap best avoided.
It doesn’t matter. Pride is no more real than sorrow or any experience, it exists within you. You can’t touch it or sense it in any way. There is no point in policing how the word is used, enjoy your subjective reality. 🌞
Pride isn’t just something we feel because "yea, i just did that". We can feel it for other aspects of our identity outside of meritocratic egoism. Just like a father can be proud of his son for showing character (and vice versa) , I believe we should take a at least a little pride in the legacies we inherit.
We are all here because we are descended from a long line of mothers (and sometimes fathers) who toiled relentlessly and often with little thanks to provide for their children. Maybe one or two generations of those mothers were shitty, but there were countless others who made things better for us. I don’t think there is anything wrong with feeling genuine pride in what those women tried to make us to be.
What would be the alternative? Resenting our own existence? Denying they incrementally made the world a better place through self sacrifice? Mumbling lip-service without feeling genuine pride in our connection to them? Pride in this legacy is just plain fine. Apathy or contempt for it seems like a character flaw.
I think you’re saying that something you are a part of is not the same as something you did. But being part of something you deem worthy is something you can/should take pride in.
IE. I am a Citizen of a country, I am proud of the country that I am a citizen of, something that through my money and through my taxes, and actions continues to exist.
You have argued that people being proud of things that are in your mind not good, somehow makes the "pride in them misplaced". I think that’s a ethical or moral argument.
Personally, while I think generally it’s fine to have pride in something, I do not like the idea of having pride in something that actively hurts people. That being said, Finding something you are proud of, it is likely impossible (once looked at) to find anything that is not hurting someone else in the process.
So I think the difference is, you’re using "pride" as the flag that these hate groups hide behind.
Facists hide behind the flags of patriotism and national pride, but they are not proud of a country, they are just using it as a method to not be outright morally inept.
Supremist have a similar move. They hide behind the flag of racial pride, but it’s not really pride, it’s hatred of others, under the guise of pride.
You can be proud without pushing anyone else down. But it’s admittedly a difficult line to walk.
To answer your example. Your FB friend? You are proud in the friendship you have with them, in their achievements as they are bettering the society that you both share.
Having pride in ones self and having pride in the net of civilization are two sides of the same coin.
Agree. I remember my parents once tearfully asking me: Aren’t I proud to be an American? A Texan? To which I could only reply: Why would I be? This was literally when we were invading another country for no reason (Iraq)
I am always proud of my friends when they win a competition. I see their hard work and achievements. Last time I even started crying while they went on the stage for the award they won. So yeah. It is possible to feel pride for someone else.
Pride, no, for precisely the reasons you list. None of us choose or control our history or our nature, which together are fully responsible for who we are right now. Satisfaction, though, yes.
I feel pride when I see humans walk together at the opening ceremonies of the olympics, or see the new knowledge gained by space exploration. That’s us doing that, we humans.
People who take pride in their race and sexuality usually come from marginalized groups. It is a different kind of pride.
The opposite of pride is shame. Being gay was extremely shameful in the west for millenia. To say "I am proud to be gay" is to say you aren’t ashamed of who you are.
Same with race. My father grew up black and poor in the 50s. He just sort of assumed he was inherently inferior, why else would all the black people he knew be poor and working menial jobs. The black pride movement blew his mind. The idea that you didn’t have to take shame and accept inferiority in your skin color was brand new. He isn’t proud to be black because he achieved something, he is proud to be black because he was raised to believe that he had the "mark of cain" and his blackness made him less than.
That sort of pride is saying "society is against me because of immutable qualities, but I still take pride in myself and have self respect"
I don’t. I don’t even use this word. I just want to do something, I work for it, when i succeed, i feel pleasant, then i move on to the next.
I literally do not feel anything about things that i had no control over. Only in my own achievements, failures/misses. I’m pretty solitary person, mostly focused on myself, improving myself, living my own life. There’s barely any vicarious enjoyment for me. I don’t identify myself as part of any faction, category. I’m just, well, my name. Every creature is an individual, unique person, even if some bits of it match with some others.
I don’t enjoy others’ successes, keep my attention mostly to myself, am pretty neutral about it. I definitely don’t mistake anyone’s success as my own, no matter who it is. If i am trying to help someone, & it succeeds, i feel pleasant that i succeeded in helping it the way i want, then i move on. I just don’t use the word ‘pride’.😅 My vocabulary is pretty controlled, i stick to words that i value, realized are constructive, i don’t curse, bash/mock anyone in the tone that’s usually used, …
I also think the world will be better this way if everyone focused on its own achievements, efforted for it, rather than just felt pleasant with not striving for much by 1self. Feelings drive humans. If i just felt pleasant by doing nothing, just by the virtue of things, what i currently am, i won’t strive to be better, thus achieve less. So to feel pleasant, i’ve to achieve things myself. The other option is a bit similar to aristocratic thinking, feeling pleasant from the things out of 1s own achievement, like ancestry, skin color, birth location, … The thought seem quite silly to me.
Anyway, that’s why i view that way.