Sister (34F) not interested in having a relationship with my (28F) daughter (5mo).

Sister (34F) not interested in having a relationship with my (28F) daughter (5mo)

Just wanting to put this situation out there to get people’s thoughts.

My sister has been struggling with infertility and was trying to get pregnant for a while before I started. It took me approximately 13 months to become pregnant with my daughter. At the time I thought I might have similar struggles getting pregnant and I felt this brought us closer together. We used to message every single day regularly.

Then I fell pregnant and pretty much everything changed. We worked together so would obviously see each other everyday, but would barely speak. I wouldn’t bring up the pregnancy so as to not hurt her feelings.

During the last few weeks of my pregnancy my sister in law organised a surprise baby shower for me and invited my sister without me knowing. She didn’t come, and criticised my sister in law for organising the baby shower (I had pre eclampsia at this stage and was visiting the hospital daily for monitoring).

After my daughter was born, I struggled badly with PPD and my mum reached out to my sister at this time asking if she and her husband would come and offer her support. My sister responded saying I needed professional help and didn’t message, call, or visit me. She didn’t visit my daughter until she was nearly four weeks old.

There have been occasions more recently when my sister has warmed to my daughter somewhat, but she never messages me asking how she is, never visits. I can count on one hand how many times she’s seen her and she lives a five minute drive away.

I’m basically torn between just leaving it alone and letting her have the relationship (or lack thereof) with my daughter that she wants, or confronting her about this. Is this normal? What kind of relationship do your siblings have with your children?

TL;DR: Sister never visits daughter despite living 5 minutes away, and never messages. Press the issue or leave it alone?