My half sister f40 (different dads) messaged yesterday asking to borrow money. I (f44) didn’t reply because she really isn’t part of my life. I have on occasion taken her and her dad (m78) and my step dad out for dinner. She replied a couple hours later saying she would figure it out.
We met my senior year of high school, and the 9 months I shared a room with her in our mom’s house was the worst experience. We talk a couple times a year, and it’s a good conversation. Still, she does things like not inviting me when she and my stepdad, her father, released balloons to mark the year anniversary of our mother passing. For years the entire family had Thanksgiving dinner but left my husband and I sitting at home alone. I even invited them to my house for dinner and was told they just really like staying home alone on Thanksgiving. I found out years later when my sister said something in passing.
I hear from her every so soften to borrow money. The last time was so a nephew I barely know could take his GED. She told me later that it was up to him to pay me back. I don’t care about the money and don’t lend expecting it back. It just feels icky. Coming to my house for a cookout resulted in a request for gas money as she was leaving since she used gas to get to my house.
Sorry for the saga, but the background is relevant.
I just feel used, and didn’t want to write a rude reply but want her to know how I feel about a family member who doesn’t treat me like family and doesn’t really have much to do with me asking for money. At the same time, I don’t really have any other family, so I don’t want to completely lose her.
Would you just not reply to her message? If you would reply, what would you say?
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