Somewhere out there, there’s a stranger whose bathroom schedule matches yours down to the minute.

r/

Somewhere out there, there’s a stranger whose bathroom schedule matches yours down to the minute.

Comments

  1. Showerthoughts_Mod Avatar

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  2. Redundancy_Nemesis Avatar

    Fact check. Who else is on the toilet right now???

  3. Razulisback Avatar

    My bathroom schedule doesn’t match my bathroom schedule

  4. Select-Belt-ou812 Avatar

    man… that asshole spends a LOT of time on his shitter…

  5. Blarg0117 Avatar

    There’s always someone pooping when you’re pooping. Maybe even millions of someone’s.

  6. Pichuchu8 Avatar

    Highly unlikely. Yeah there’s people that will be using the bathroom the same time as me but every single time at the same time? Highly unlikely… Especially considering that a bathroom schedule isn’t really a schedule since it’s spontaneous and when you have to go.

  7. doubtfurious Avatar

    “Every time I go to the bathroom, I assume there’s someone else on the planet going to the bathroom. So I say, ‘I’m gonna go to the bathroom, too.’”

  8. Erycius Avatar

    Wait, people have a schedule? I just go whenever nature calls.

  9. SDFX-Inc Avatar

    Synchronized Shitting.

    Combine with Synchronized Swimming for maximum damage.

  10. ngetch Avatar

    I feel bad for that individual. Also myself.

  11. jrhooo Avatar

    Which leads to the offices most treacherous game.

    “Shitter Chicken”.

    When you are in the stall, then someone else comes in to the next stall and poops too. Then, you don’t want to come out and interact so you wait for them to finish and leave, but THEY are waiting on YOU to finish and leave.

  12. supershinythings Avatar

    At a previous job it seemed like my schedule matched one of the executives’ schedules exactly. Twice a day several times a week he’d come around the corner and we’d almost hit each other on the way into the bathroom. Fortunately he had enough meetings in other buildings that this was only a semi-regular (har har har) occurrence.

  13. StarHammer_01 Avatar

    My bathroom schedule is “whenever I feel the beed for it”

    So yes a lot of people have the same schedule

  14. ConfidentDiffidence Avatar

    The idea of a “bathroom schedule” is wild to me.

    Its an “as needed” situation for most people I’d imagine.

  15. KingBooRadley Avatar

    I take 3 very short cold showers most days between May and September. I use a water pick. I spend maybe 15 seconds on my hair each day. I have doubts I have a habit twin out there.

  16. Smorb Avatar

    It’s not a stranger. It’s my wife, and she’s always 5 seconds faster than I am. Ridiculous.

  17. Strange_Ad_9702 Avatar

    And you will meet this person everyday in the work bathroom.

  18. Presently_Absent Avatar

    An app would let us connect. A chat app where the one thing you have in common is that you’re sitting on the toilet. Think of the conversations!

  19. Bowiesmassivebulge Avatar

    Given that I shit 2-4 times a day, I highly doubt it.

  20. newtbob Avatar

    I have had some version of every shower thought ever posted. Except this one.

  21. restlessleg Avatar

    i pee angrily

    is a sentence you didn’t expect to read today

  22. TheRemedy187 Avatar

    It’s more likely there isn’t. I’m not sure why you think that. 

  23. Wise-Barracuda-9435 Avatar

    Odds are, you’ve already flushed at the exact same time once in your lives.

  24. Mondominiman Avatar

    Schedule? Listen man, the alarm sounds off at different times every day and I’m going whether I like it or not

  25. ChoiceReady3586 Avatar

    Why?Who is stalking me and demented enough to do this? Reveal yourself!

  26. jobee23 Avatar

    A minute? HA. Shit fires from my ass like an air cannon. Then, I use a fire hydrant as a bidet.

  27. The_Baron___ Avatar

    I went to the bathroom at 17, I flushed as the person in the other bathroom flushed, started washing my hands as they did, pulled two papers-towels out as they did, heard the bang of the metal garbage can hitting the same time and we opened the door at the exact same time.

    For some reason, as a self-conscious young man, I avoided eye contact with a young woman who had this fascinated look in her eye. She definitely knew it happened too, but I couldn’t compel myself to engage about bathrooms with a woman.

    I still wonder if I had been braver if I would have met my bathroom soulmate and been able to get her number… Alas, it wasn’t meant to be, as I found the love of my life much later in life and I’ve been too nervous to ask if she had this bathroom experience in the local grocery store at 17 or not.

  28. XROOR Avatar

    When I would pass out drunk:

    Many in assisted living facilities shared my schedule:

    Piss at 0430

    Shit at 0515

    Wake up at 0612

  29. FairieButt Avatar

    He’s not a stranger anymore. We’ve been dating a few years. At least daily one of us needs to walk to the further toilet because the other one got to the close one first.

  30. Lady_Irish Avatar

    No, it’s my own friggin son. Every damned day I have to have a piss emergency while he’s in the middle of taking the worlds longest shit. It’s bonkers lol