STBX JNMIL trash talking me

My STBX JNMIL and FIL are like pseudo celebrities here in this little town. JNMIL has been trash talking me for years. I get all kinds of body language and cold behaviors from people I have never met before. This isn’t normal for me. I am a therapist and I’m generally pretty likable. So I have been aware this is likely the case for years but had no actual proof. Until now.

Since we have decided to divorce JNMIL and FIL have done nothing except bad mouth me all over town to anyone who listen. JNMIL frames her gossip as asking for prayers. STBX told me that he has to keep shutting them down because they will just go into rants about me to him on the phone. He is upset by it because he never actually believed me when I said his parents were AHs who were spreading gossip about me and I could tell because I would get this cold behavior from people I never met before and the exchanges always started the same. “Oh you’re a Surname. Do you happen to know FIL name? He was my 5th grade teacher.” Then I would say something like “Yeah he’s the kids grandpa or STBX’S father or whatever.” Then it was like a realization crossed their face and they treat me like garbage.

For example, I go to the only gym in town with childwatch for my 3 yo. When I’m signing up the person, never met them before, exchange above happens and then she hands me the paperwork asks for ny card and proceeds to be very cold, whispers to her colleague, looks in my direction, I try to make small talk because there’s a lot of forms, she cold shoulders me turns to her colleague and gossips some more clearly about me, you know the feeling, the looks. Meanwhile both my kids are there and my 11 yo feels the exchange as well and asks “Do you know her?” And I’m like “Nope”.

Anyways. So this is so fun. Ugh. I don’t know what to do other than pretend to not have a clue who they’re talking about anymore. Or maybe I will just crack some eggs “Oh you mean my ex’s dad? Yeah I really can’t wait to finalize and change my name.” I mean WTF. I don’t even know these people but I swear they taught half the freaking town. Now they’re using our divorce as a reason to reach out ask for prayers and trash me to anyone who will listen. 🙃