Hi y’all so I’m a gay man who hasn’t started dating yet but I want to do it in the future. While the apps are probably my safest bet I’ve been thinking about actually asking people out irl but I’m definitely worried about how they might act or say in response in case they’re straight, I don’t wanna get hate-crimed.
Straight guys, how would you respond to a gay man asking you out/flirting with you?
r/AskMen
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Hey man, I really appreciate the compliment, I’m flattered, I’m straight, but thank you
it’s kinda, clear and respectful in my opinion
Flattered in the interest, but I would politely decline.
Gay dudes used to hit on me when I was a server back in college. I would just act like I was oblivious/stupid to avoid any conflict or awkwardness.
“Flattered but I am into girls.”
Or something like that.
No is a complete sentence which I think would be an appropriate response.
If they pushed, I’d then tell them I’m married, because I am.
If it continued, then we are looking at a restraining order.
I’m straight and I’ve been hit on a lot by gay men, personally It doesn’t bother me other than feeling bad for disappointing the dude once I realize he’s been hitting on me.
But the response is going to very a lot based on where you are and what subculture your hanging out with. The main subculture I’m part of is generally pretty open and accepting even if statistically most of its members are straight.
I’d say get a feel for the guy/group your hanging around from general conversations to gauge if it’s safe to initiate or not
Happened a handful of times, I politely declined.
One time I was out with my male friend. And this guy hit on me. I said “hey look bro, we can chat, but Im not gay. Its all good if you are though, just letting you know.” and he pointed at my friend and in a bitchy voice said “Oh…youre with HIM? EW.”
I said “hey man, thats pretty disrespectful. he didnt do anything to you. Im being polite to you about this for now.”
And then he said “okkkk im sorry.” we chatted for a bit until his female friend came over.
(this is ancient history, long before the wife)
Do you have a lesbian sister you can set me up with