My wife is a white wine drinker. I drink red because I am smart, tasteful and sophisticated.
I have had some financial issues which culminated in me having to lower my credit card limits a bit and fork over one of my cards to my wife.
Long story short, I think I need new tires for my ride, and while I have some fat pay checks forthcoming, I am caught in that Netherland between broke and flush.
So I wanted that card back and I went on the hunt. I found it, but determined that I should leave it there until I really really need it. Smart right?
But lo and behold, what did I find just kiddie corner to my CC? You guessed, two premium and expensive bottles of red wine. Hidden there, just beyond my reach. Diabolical and hurtful for her to hide that from me, of all people.
My guess is she has no clue how expensive and amazing these bottles are. So my wheels start turning. Am I going to let the mother of my children just let these wonderful wines just die on the vines, so to speak, in this dark dank closet? Or is there a better solution?
Perhaps I can find similar shaped bottles that are way way cheaper and replace? Or maybe, I can pinhole the bottles and suck out the succulent wine and replace it with shitty 2 Buck Chuck…which is now under Trump probably $5 buck chuck. Sorry MAGA, but it’s true.
Anyway, open to suggestions here. How do I liberate this fine wine from my sweet wife who is hiding it from me and won’t appreciate it regardless?
And also, should I divorce her over this?
Comments
Should prob just mind your own business. Maybe she bought them for you as a surprise and you just ruined it.
The answer is obvious; butt chug the wine and send her pictures of you doing it.