I’m 33M, and having a very strong desire to have sex. I’m unable to control my thoughts, and day by day I’m unable to divert myself from this thought as well. I know I should not be thinking about sex all the time, but somehow I end up overthinking about it and desperately want to have it. This is ruining my life, I don’t know if I’m a sex addict or something, believe me I do not watch pornography that often hardly once in a year. I’m simply excited by the thought of having sex with a girl, I don’t have to watch videos. Even if I watch it’s not increasing or subsiding my feel to have sex. The reason I’m adding this in confession is, I’m unable to share this with anyone, my family or not even my very close friends. Forget about psychiatrists, I definitely can’t meet someone random, I don’t have the money and even if I have and spend it’ll be questioned by my family what I spent and where. So this is not an option. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to satisfy myself. I live in Melbourne, tried looking for girls to hang out with, but I’m not good, I don’t know where to look for. Going pubs, is not an option as I don’t drink. I can’t go to social places because my family wouldn’t let me. All I go is to work, and I respect my work place and people. I know I need help, but I don’t know how can I either get help or real girls. At least getting this out of my chest makes my heart feel light, I hate god for creating a person like me in this world who is waiting to have sex but do not have a means to have it, what is this suffering, why am I even living a life like this. I know people will think of bad of me, because I have such thoughts all the time, I seriously did not ask for such thoughts, it is coming to me and I’m unable to stop.
Comments
Alcohol and Reddit is a horrible mix
It’s like if you re read what you wrote you can find the answer
Go to a whore
Why your family won’t let you go to social places?
Well, do you have sexual activity frequently ?
Transmute the sexual energy into something. Try yoga, Qigong, some kind of exercise to circulate the flow of energy. You could try talking to people online like Omegle to practice your social skills with girls. Keep practicing if you really want it and you’ll get good
I go to pubs and I don’t drink. 🤷♀️
You can always pay for sex (if legal where ur at) although you sound obsessed and I’d be worried you would hurt someone just to get off. Masturbate and schedule a therapy appointment immediately. Like. Now. That kind of obsession is not super normal and if it’s getting to ur self control I’m scared you might hurt someone. Do the right thing dude, you haven’t done anything wrong yet.
Inner engineering from Sadhguru could help to channel this energy somewhere else and learn how your mind function against you and what to do about it 🙏
Have you thought about using dating apps?
Could it be less about sex and more about the desire to have fun? Maybe I’m reaching but sounds like you’re pretty stifled by your family.
Family can love us and still act in ways bad for us.. a man of 33 years of age should not have to ask for permission to go out, nor should he be single ideally if he’s from an unorthodox family.. no problem with being single, but it’s just in contrast to your other info.
If you’ve always felt very controlled and disciplined by your family, you might be unconsciously wanting to have some autonomy and fun by ways of sex… It’s the frustration coming out in a twisted way.
Short term fix: watch gross corn to turn yourself off
Long-term fix: Gain autonomy bit by bit and observe if the obsession recedes. Maybe create distance and go on a vacation alone.
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Just a precaution. Confessing to this, doesnt mean you can give in to the urge without consent. As other comments have said, re read your confession, the solution is in there
You are a 33 year old person and your parents dictate your life??? That sounds highly unhealthy and should stop. Also, I see from your answers here, how you say you value women and don’t want a hook up, but your post history says otherwise. Nothing wrong with that, just be honest with yourself and your needs. Always remember, before you do anything with anyone, make sure you both consent and you don’t make anyone uncomfortable, due to being overly obsessed about it!
Maybe try keeping yourself busy like volunteering doing something you enjoy, going out for walks or even a good workout at the gym are all good options to burn off some of that pent-up energy while keeping your mind busy and meeting new people who, knows you may just find a girl in the process.
Tbh you’re 30, I’m not sure why your parents have such a grip on your life. Do you live in with them? I think you should try to move out if so. It kind of sounds like your missing out on a lot due to your parents.