We have seen some truly wild wedding and baby shower horror stories in our time, but the level of entitlement coming from this mom-to-be might just take the cake—or in this case, the lumpia. Usually, when you cut someone from a guest list, you accept that you are also cutting ties with their presence, their gifts, and certainly their labor. But one woman on Reddit just found out that her “friend” thought she could kick her to the curb while still keeping her as the unpaid catering service, and the internet is rightfully screaming.
The OP (Original Poster) reconnected with an old friend who had moved back to the state and was rushing to plan a last-minute baby shower. The mom-to-be (MTB) had a chaotic timeline—she discovered she was pregnant at thirty-five weeks due to complications and had an induction scheduled for week thirty-seven. The OP, being an absolute saint of a friend, was thrilled to reconnect and volunteered to take on a massive responsibility: the food. And we aren’t talking about picking up a veggie tray from Costco; she volunteered to cook a full Filipino feast.
For those who don’t know, making homemade lumpia, pancit, and chicken adobo is not a quick task. It is a labor of love that takes hours of prep work. The OP volunteered to feed fifty people—despite the guest list only being fifteen—just to be safe. She also chipped in money for the decorations. She took a day off from her part-time job and arranged for her mother-in-law to watch her own baby so she could spend the entire day cooking and prepping a grazing table. She was fully committed to making this day special.
Then, the night before the party—after the OP had spent the entire day cooking and had her car loaded with trays of delicious food—the MTB decided to drop a bomb. She sent a DM on Instagram (because apparently, she couldn’t even dignify her with a text or call) stating she had to make “hard decisions” and was uninviting the OP. But here is the kicker: she followed up that rejection by saying she still “wanted” the OP to drop off the food.
Let’s just pause and really process that. She uninvited the person who paid for the decor and cooked the entire menu, but expected her to still drive seventy-five minutes each way to deliver the feast. She wanted the OP to be a delivery driver for a party she was banned from attending. The lack of self-awareness is truly scientific in its magnitude. She didn’t want a friend; she wanted a free catering service.
The OP, possessing a shiny spine of steel, told her absolutely not. She explained that the only reason she volunteered to cook for an army was because she was a guest. It makes zero sense to drive over two hours round-trip to drop off lumpia to a house where you aren’t welcome. The MTB then had the nerve to ask how she was going to find catering on such short notice, calling the OP “f’ed up and hateful.”
To make matters even stickier, the MTB tried to spin the narrative to the rest of the group. She told the decor lady—the mutual friend the OP had already sent money to—that the OP wasn’t coming because “her feelings got hurt,” conveniently omitting the part where she explicitly uninvited her. The OP had to send screenshots of the DMs to the group chat just to clear her name.
While most of the friends sided with the OP, three of them actually told her she should have been the “bigger person” because the MTB was going through a rough time finding out she was pregnant so late. Let’s be real: finding out you are pregnant two weeks before your due date is stressful, but it isn’t a license to rob your friends. Being the “bigger person” doesn’t mean letting someone treat you like a doormat with a spatula.
The OP mentioned she never even asked for the decor money back, letting it go as a gift, which is more grace than this bride deserved. But as for the mountain of pancit and lumpia? The OP didn’t let it go to waste. She donated all of it to a women’s and children’s shelter. She fed people who actually needed and appreciated the meal, rather than a “friend” who treated her like an Uber Eats driver.
So, is the OP the a-hole? Absolutely not. The MTB played a stupid game and won a hungry, food-free prize. Hopefully, those three “supportive” friends enjoy ordering pizza, because the grazing table is officially closed for business.
What would you do if a friend uninvited you but asked for the gift anyway? Would you have dropped it off to be nice, or would you have done exactly what this chef did? Let us know in the comments if you think the shelter was the perfect recipient for that feast!