Thinking I nay have a JNMIL and over it

Been with partner almost 4 years. Always thought MIL and I had a pleasant relationship.
Partner is one of two children, has a sister.
Partner and I and SIL and partner have started having kids. We have a 10 month old, SIL has a 1y4m ish and another on the way (very recent tho). SIL lives out of our country, 10 hour ish travel day. We live in the same country as MIL, 40 min flight away.

The amount of favortism that has emerged in MIL is something I have NOT expected. I already vaguely knew that this was a thing between her two kids but we’ve honestly never really cared. It’s become quite evident within the past 1.4 years (since first grandchild was born), MIL has gone over to visit SIL about 5 or 6 times for long periods of time. Aside from going over for the birth of grandson, she goes over to help with her grandson and hang with SIL. She went over for SIL’s birthday to give her and her partner a break over 2 days so that SIL and partner could have a spa weekend, her grandson was the same age as our daughter is now. SIL has come over to our country a couple of times for weeks at a time, once when I was still pregnant and then recently (our daughter would’ve been about 8 months). The most recent trip, MIL spent weeks travelling around with SIL and family, including the two days they spent visiting us (not paying much attention to our daughter but lots to grandson of course)

But us (her son and granddaughter), who live in the same country? She visited for 4 days after she was born which we were extremely grateful for, then for a weekend when daughter was 4 weeks old which was lovely. Then nothing until we visited her when LO was 6 months, and then she saw us with SIL recently. No other visits. Didn’t seem interested in coming for my partner’s birthday and of course would never offer to look after LO while we have a spa weekend lol. We of course would never ask this of her and anyone but very telling.

All of this came to a head when we were told that MIL is taking TWO more month long trips this year to see SIL and grandson. One next month, and then one later this year. Meanwhile, this woman has seen our child for two days this year, which was shared with her grandson. MIL paid barely any attention to our daughter and much more attention to grandson while we were all together.

Last year she suggested that DH and LO visit her before LO started daycare, and even offered to pay for it. This was due to be in March. DH spent a bit of time trying to nail down when this would be, she got really weird and declared it would be too expensive to pay for them to visit her. We offered to pay for part of it or even all of it at a stretch. She then said the timing didn’t work. She was claiming this while dropping lots of money on her travels with SIL and then dropping more money to book second trip to SIL later this year, which was decided AFTER suggesting we visit her.
In a bid to not look like she was playing favourites, and without even confirming the timing with us, she booked a visit to see us for two days at a super inconvenient time (bang in the middle of the week, work and daycare be damned) without asking us. Her lame excuse was so that she could give us a break so that “we could go to dinner”. During the work week? Yeah no thanks. By the by, booking herself a trip here is more expensive than paying for DH and LO to go and see her.

I’m sick of already feeling like an afterthought and am already lowering contact for the sake of our daughter. DH, bless him, has already tried to talk to her about it, but she quickly shut the conversation down and started talking about SIL and grandson of course. We’ve decided that he will try one more time, and will ask her to allow him to finish what he wants to say and to not talk over him. If she isn’t receptive, we will just cut the rope.

It makes me so sad as well, as we lost my dad very suddenly a few years ago. He never had the chance to meet our daughter, and would’ve absolutely loved her. To have her being treated as an afterthought means she only has two attentive grandparents (my mom and FIL, who is divorced from MIL).

Dunno what I’m looking for here, just a place to rant mainly. Thank you for reading!