We all know that every office has its own unique ecosystem. You have the guy who microwaves fish, the person who replies all to every email, and the executive who insists everyone is “family.” But generally speaking, modern office culture has settled into a comfortable zone of first-name basis. It is the great equalizer that keeps things running smoothly. However, one man on Reddit just introduced us to a new hire who is trying to rewrite the rules of corporate hierarchy with a level of main character energy that is frankly baffling.
Our narrator has been with his company for six years. He describes the vibe as “very informal” and “laid back.” The company president goes by “Dave.” His boss is “Lou.” The narrator himself, let’s call him Dennis, explicitly tells people to drop the “Mr.” and just use his first name. It sounds like a chill place to work where the focus is on the job rather than the title.
Enter the new employee. We will call her “Ginny Potter.” Ginny is three levels below Dennis in the corporate hierarchy. She is brand new. And yet, she has decided that she is the Dowager Countess of the office. From day one, Ginny has insisted on referring to herself, and being referred to, as “Ms. Potter.”
Now, if she was doing this out of a deep-seated need for professional distance across the board, that might be one thing. It would be weird in a casual office, but maybe understandable. But here is the kicker that sends this story from “quirky” to “entitled.” When she calls our narrator, she says, “Good Morning, Dennis, this is Ms. Potter.”
I need you to sit with that for a second. She calls her superior by his first name, but demands he use an honorific for her. She is literally trying to verbally gentrify her position in the company. It is a power move so transparent and bizarre that I am surprised she doesn’t carry a gavel to meetings.
Dennis, to his credit, isn’t playing along. He responds with, “Good morning, Ginny, how can I help you?” He matches her energy towards him. If he is Dennis, she is Ginny. It is simple reciprocity. But word has gotten back to him that she thinks he is being disrespectful.
This is the part where I have to laugh. Disrespectful? Disrespectful is walking into a room where the CEO goes by Dave and demanding everyone treat you like a visiting dignitary while you treat them like your pal from high school. You cannot have it both ways. You cannot demand the respect of a title while refusing to extend that same courtesy to the people who literally sign your checks.
His boss thinks it is idiotic. Most of the office just ignores it or avoids using her name entirely, which creates a weird, Voldemort-esque “she who must not be named” vibe in the office. But Dennis’s wife thinks he is being an ahole for “antagonizing” her.
Let’s be real here. Dennis is N-T-A. He is not the ahole. He is just a guy refusing to participate in a weird ego trip. If Ms. Potter wants to be addressed formally, she needs to start addressing everyone else formally too. Until she calls him “Mr. Smith,” she is just “Ginny.”
You have to read the room when you start a new job. If you are the only person in the building demanding a title, you aren’t setting a boundary. You are making yourself impossible to work with. And honestly, if your biggest concern at a new job is making sure your boss calls you “Ms.” while you call him “Dennis,” you might want to check your priorities before HR checks them for you.