I’ve rewritten this four times because I don’t want to sound like I’m just whining. I know everyone’s got their own problems right now, and mine aren’t special. But I feel like I’m at a point where I just need to put this out somewhere, even if no one sees it.
I lost my job three months ago. I’ve applied to over 90 positions, everything from retail to remote admin work. I got two interviews. No callbacks. My savings dried up faster than I expected—between rent, utilities, and taking care of my younger sister (she’s 17 and still in school), I’m tapped.
Last Friday, my car was repossessed. Monday, the power company put us on final notice. Today, I had to choose between paying for my sister’s medication or groceries. I picked the meds and ate the last two slices of bread in the house. She doesn’t know I skipped dinner—she thinks I already ate.
I don’t really have family. Parents are gone. No one to call. Just me, her, and a whole lot of silence.
I’m not posting this for pity. I know Reddit can be brutal. I just needed somewhere to say this out loud. Because pretending everything’s okay when it really isn’t… it’s exhausting.
If anyone’s been through something like this and made it out, I’d honestly love to hear how you did it. Right now, I feel like I’m treading water with bricks tied to my legs.
Thanks for reading. Even just writing it down helped a little.
Comments
I feel for you. Truly. I know it won’t mean much, but there WILL be an improvement of your situation. I have known times in my life when i thought i’d reached rock bottom, and probably did. But possibilities are as a matter of fact endless, and can always surprise you. Xx
Not sure location but with spring coming a lot of restaurants and landscapers are staffing up?
I made 30$+ an hour waitressing at a country club
And have you looked into local food banks? Applies for SNAP? Just options in case you haven’t. Sorry everything is so rough right now.
My heart goes out to you. Look at you raising your sister and making sacrifices for her. Look at you applying to all of these positions. You are doing it and you’re allowed to have a hard day – or more than one hard day.
I wish I had a magic wand or a way to promise you when things will change. All I can do is tell you that I wish you the best and hope you hang in there.
I am so sorry. 💔 Do you get social security for your sister? If not, because of your sister’s age, she should receive payments from your parents’ contributions. Let your sister’s school know too, but ask for confidentiality. They may know of many different helpful programs. I really wish you the best.
If you are in the US, apply for SNAP benefits and visit your local food pantries and churches. Even if you are not religious, many of them will help you out of a tight spot.
If you need to have a more active way to get it off your chest I recommend chatGPT, it has helped me immensely vs thinking into the void.
When my oldest daughter was little, I shared ramen noodle packets with her – it was all I could afford. I had no furniture except her crib. I slept on a lawn chair in the living room of a run down trailer. We had roaches that I could not get rid of. It was a literal hellscape. I got lucky and her paternal grandfather took pity on us – her father sure as hell didn’t. He gave us a car. It barely ran and the windshield wipers didn’t work, but it was enough to get me to the welfare office and to Pizza Hut to apply for a job.
That was 31 years ago.
I’m now a social worker helping people every single day who are in that exact situation. I have a cute little house where I live with my amazing husband. My MIL lives with us and I have a relatively comfortable life. We aren’t rich by any means. We will never retire into some fancy nursing home. But we have food and we have power.
When I was where you are, I thought I’d never get out. I thought there was no way out. Here’s what I will tell you looking back: Accept help, apply for every government program out there (message me if you need help finding resources in your area). Find food banks – they literally throw food away because they don’t have enough people to take it. Keep applying for the shit jobs. One day, one of them will pay off in some way you may not even recognize until later. You may have to work 2 or 3 at a time and man, it’ll suck. But one day? You’re going to look back at this and it’s going to seem so surreal – almost like it happened to someone else. And when you hit that moment? Pay it forward.
This stuff of life is what makes a person strong and resilient and wise. I’ve been there. The weight in your stomach and on your shoulders makes you feel not human.
Look into bill relief for your county and find a local food pantry, there is zero shame in accepting the things people want to share.
Did your parents pass away or leave? If they passed and you are in the US you should be getting survivor benefits as the caregiver of your sister.
Please check into local food pantries instead of not eating. Also talk to the school social worker about assistance programs to help you and your sister. As a minor in your care you should be getting some sort of support to help care for her.