There is a special kind of anxiety that comes with dating someone who treats every transaction like a high-stakes negotiation. We usually associate extreme couponing with struggling college students or reality TV stars, but apparently, corporate executives are hoarding discount codes too. One woman on Reddit is currently questioning her entire relationship because her boyfriend, a successful Vice President, refuses to spend a single dime unless the item is marked down. It is a clash of lifestyles that turned a simple dinner date into a parking lot standoff.
The couple has been together for four months, and on paper, he is a total catch. He is cute, smart, and holds a high-ranking position at his company. But there is a catch, and that catch is that he is allergic to full-price items. The OP describes an obsession that governs every aspect of his life, from the grocery list to his underwear drawer. He plans his meals around the weekly flyer and proudly wears clearance rack clothing despite his healthy salary.
Most people love a good bargain. If you compliment someone’s outfit and they tell you it cost twenty dollars, the usual reaction is a high-five, not horror. Yet, when this boyfriend proudly told the OP’s friend that his shirt was a clearance find, the OP was “mortified.” She seems to think that having money means you need to pretend you paid top dollar for everything. It is a strange hill to die on, considering most of us are out here trying to survive on sales racks while he is stacking his savings.
The situation reached a boiling point during a dinner date. The boyfriend had a digital coupon for a buy-one-get-one-free meal, because of course he did. When the technology failed and the cashier couldn’t process the deal, the boyfriend dug his heels in. He refused to pay for both dinners, holding up a crowded line while waiting for a manager to resolve the two-dollar discrepancy.
Instead of standing by her man or perhaps offering to cover the difference to keep the line moving, the OP bailed. She was so embarrassed by the delay and the annoyed customers behind them that she walked out of the restaurant and sat in the car. Leaving your partner alone at the counter because things got a little awkward is a harsh move. It signals that her image matters more to her than his company.
The night ended in a heated argument during the drive home. They missed their movie—which he had free tickets for, naturally—and haven’t spoken since. When the OP took her grievances to her friends at brunch, expecting them to validate her secondhand embarrassment, they didn’t see the problem. They, like the rest of us, probably wouldn’t mind a boyfriend who is financially responsible, even if he is a bit intense about it.
There is a difference between being cheap and being frugal. This guy isn’t refusing to tip or making her pay for everything. He is just maximizing his money. That is probably how he stays wealthy. The OP seems to equate spending money with status, whereas he treats money like a game he intends to win. Being “mortified” that he bought a shirt on sale says a lot more about her insecurities than his bank account.
Honestly, a VP who cooks based on grocery sales and hunts for free movie tickets sounds like a keeper in this economy. The OP needs to decide if she wants a partner or a walking ATM who throws cash around to impress strangers. If she breaks up with him, there is a long line of people ready to date a guy who loves a BOGO deal.
So, is the OP the ahole? It certainly looks that way. She ditched her boyfriend over a coupon and judged him for being smart with his money. Maybe next time she should pay full price for her own dinner if the wait for the manager is too much to handle.
What would you do if your partner held up a line for a discount? Would you wait it out, or would you head for the car like this girlfriend? Let us know in the comments if you think being a “cheapskate” is a dealbreaker!