This Woman Wants to Divorce Her Husband Because Her Engagement Ring is Moissanite Instead of Diamond, and I Am Screaming

We have all heard the saying that comparison is the thief of joy. Usually we apply that to scrolling through Instagram or looking at our neighbor’s new car. But apparently it also applies to geology because one woman is ready to throw her entire marriage into the trash can because her shiny rock is the wrong kind of shiny rock.

Let us set the scene. Our narrator is a 23-year-old woman watching her older sister’s life implode over what might be the most superficial reason in history. The sister is 29 and married to a man the narrator describes as a great guy. They seemed happy. They seemed in love. There were zero signs of a failing relationship until the sister suddenly picked up the phone, sobbing like she had just watched a puppy get kicked.

Naturally the narrator assumed something terrible had happened. Maybe he cheated. Maybe he gambled away their savings. Maybe he has a secret second family in Vermont. But no. The tragedy that has reduced this grown woman to tears is that her jeweler friend got suspicious of her engagement ring. The friend urged her to get it tested and the results came back. It was not a diamond. It was moissanite.

For those who do not know moissanite is a gemstone that looks almost identical to a diamond to the naked eye. It is nearly as hard and actually has more brilliance and fire than a diamond. It is also ethically sourced and costs significantly less. To a rational person this is a smart financial decision that results in a pretty piece of jewelry. To this sister it is grounds for a divorce.

I need you to really sit with the logic here. She isn’t mad because he lied about the price. She isn’t mad because the ring turned her finger green. She is considering ending her legal union with another human being because she thinks his purchase of a lab-grown stone means he “didn’t really love her.” She claims he supposedly had enough money for a diamond but honestly who cares? Maybe he wanted to spend that money on a house or a honeymoon or literally anything other than a compressed piece of carbon.

The sister is equating the market value of a stone with the value of her husband’s affection. It is a transactional view of love that is frankly terrifying. If he had spent three months of his salary on a rock would that suddenly make him a better husband? Would it change how he treats her on a Tuesday night? No. It would just mean they have less money in the bank.

The narrator did exactly what a good sister should do. She told her the truth. She told her it was ridiculous to divorce someone over a fake ring. She didn’t coddle her delusion. She didn’t validate her materialism. She called it like she saw it.

Of course the sister didn’t want to hear that. She wanted an echo chamber. She wanted someone to gasp and tell her that she deserves a real diamond and that her husband is a cheapskate monster. When she didn’t get that reaction she got sarcastic and hung up. She is probably sitting at home right now looking at her hand and willing herself to be miserable about something that literally no one else would notice without a jeweler’s loupe.

So is the narrator the ahole? Absolutely not. N-T-A. If your marriage is so fragile that it can be shattered by a gemstone report then it wasn’t a very strong marriage to begin with. The husband deserves someone who loves him for him and not for the retail value of the accessories he buys.