What brought the two of you together, despite the age gap? How did her family and friends recieve you? How did YOUR family receive HER?
Those of you who dated or in a relationship with a woman significantly younger or older than yourself, what was the experience like?
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What brought the two of you together, despite the age gap? How did her family and friends recieve you? How did YOUR family receive HER?
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Younger. I was 30 and she was 22. Her being hot and horny was super great. Everything else sucked.
Idk about “significantly” but I’ve had up to 7 year age gaps, never really thought much of it.
Me 40 her 27 for a while. We both knew it wasn’t going to be long term, just a years or so of dating and travel weekends. It was fun, she’s a great person, if I’d wanted to get married and start a family again maybe it would have gone further. But I don’t, and it’s what she wants. So it was always going to have a short shelf life.
8-9 year difference. (Currently 36 and 28)
She’s very childish and sometimes it feels like I’m raising her rather than living with her.
I have not seriously dated anyone with a significant age gap. I’ve casually dated several much younger women. I think it’s fine. I’d say down to about age 25 or 26, there’s not really all that much difference between her and a woman who’s 35. Once you get a little younger they’re a bit different, but it can still be fun experience as long as she’s not a completely immature chaotic mess.
None of these women met any of my friends or family, and I didn’t meet any of their family. I did meet a few of their friends and for the most part wasn’t thrilled with the experience. Spending time with one 22 year old woman, she can seem like a perfectly decent and reasonably mature companion. With two 22 year old women, sometimes the immaturity really shows and it gets old fast.
Hell 🤣
I dated a woman who was 42 when I was 19. We were a good match because we had a lot of the same interests. The thing that made the age gap very apparent was our pop culture references.
I was 25 when we met. She was 50. She was divorced, no kids. She married in her early 30s, but found out a month after her wedding that her ex husband was cheating on her the whole time. So to her, she never felt like she got to experience marriage and count it. She dated two more men after for a year or two but that also didn’t workout and she gave up on relationships, just lived a single life.
When I first saw her, I thought she was in her late 30s or early 40s. She was gorgeous for her real age. I was fresh out of a relationship too and just wanted something casual so even if I thought she was 10-15 years older, it was no big deal.
We both felt that undeniable “spark” the first time we met. I asked her for her phone number and we went out on our first date a few days later. It took her 5 dates (~3 weeks later) to finally tell me her real age. I paused for a second of course, but at that point we were both smitten with each other, so I said fuck it, who cares. I told her I loved her for the first time 3 months in on New Year’s Eve, she cried and said it back.
We lived together for 3 years. When we were together, everything felt natural. We never felt an age gap except in specific situations. One example, I took her to the doctors office for a check up one day and they asked what’s my relationship with her, I said “she’s my stepmom” and when the receptionist turned around, she punched my arm and we started laughing.
The age difference was always something in the back of our heads but after 2 years, I sat down with her and started talking seriously about what our future would look like. We thought about marriage, but I knew my parents would never approve it, they refused to meet her when I told them about her. Her family were all in her home country, but I’ve FaceTimed with them over the years and they all loved me too. She had money, but never flaunted it, never wanted anything fancy. I never asked for it and would still pay for her on our dates sometimes. Little things like that made her love me even more. We knew we could live quite well with our incomes, even if mine was way lower.
But as the reality of having a difficult future started setting in due to the age (what happens when I’m 50 and she’s 75? What happens if she can’t take care of herself one day? What happens if she passes away first?), she slowly began to push me away. She wanted me to date women my age so I could live a “normal” life and not suffer loneliness in the future or the hardship of having to take care of her in old age. We cried a lot, many times towards the end of the relationship. She told me she would always love me and of course I know I will always love her. I told her many times I would’ve gladly traded 25 years of my life to be with her. But she refused to be selfish and keep me because she knew how hard it would be later on.
It’s been 3 years since we broke up. I’ve dated lots of women since then. I’ve been through another serious relationship and I’ve moved on. But she’ll always hold a special place in my heart. Taught me lots of things, showed me what love could really be like. I’ll never admit it to my previous partner but a lot of things I’ve done for her, were things that my 50 year old ex did for me. We still keep in touch occasionally, but we both are mature enough to keep the emotions out of it. She’s doing well and I hope she finds someone her age to be with too one day but she’s already told me that she doesn’t think there’ll ever be anyone else like me again. Maybe in another life we’ll get another go around, this time with both of us being at the same age.
A long time back when I was twenty four I met and dated a 36 year old woman. It was great when we were alone, but then we considered introducing ourselves to the others friends and the wheels came off the wagon. I would have had nothing in common with her married friends who had kids and were a dozen years older than me.
What brought us together was a mutual hobby on YouTube, i wanted to know something about it and sent her an E-mail. That was 2017 – 2018. Had no clue about her age, turned out she was 18-19 Years old. We had contact on/off for about 5 – 6 Years give or take but regained contact September 2023.
October 2023 we met up for the first time and there was incredible chemistry. A week later we met up again, she stayed the night. We decided, let’s bite the bullet (she was 24 at the time, i was 32) and see where it goes.
Her parents liked me, especially her mom really thought i was a great person for her daughter. Her dad thought i was too. Her stepdad thought i was “okay” we never really connected well.
My mom thought she was an angel, my dad thought she was super friendly albeit a bit of a plain jane, which was true. My friends thought she was easy-going and lovely. But well, this long ass novel of mine shows you that they were wrong..
She and i from the start had some difficulties due to her on-going contact with an ex, she kept telling me “once my stuff arrive it’ll dwindle down” (they were long distance) and it never dwindled down obviously. To the point of her wanting to play videogames with him on NYE, and inviting him over during his layover to go look at her new apartment. All while he didn’t know she was in a new relationship.
We also had a few discussions about why she had put all her boyfriends prior to me on social media, but made an issue out of it to put me on there. She told me “i’m not like that anymore since my ex and i broke up, i don’t want the whole world to know about it” (considering what she did later in this story that was a lie and a red flag)
Around the 3 Month mark or so she also regained contact with an online male friend and they spoke every day, fine by me. You know what DID bother me? (just like with the ex) he didn’t know about her being in a relationship yet she kept talking to him to that extent even after me telling her that it made me uneasy that they exchanged 200 text messages a day and that i hoped that she could at least tone that down a bit and tell him about us
At the 4 Month mark she goes out to eat with her colleagues from work, she called me up “i told my colleagues something you’re gonna be thrilled about”
She told them “i’m seeing someone” and showed a veerrryyyyy grainy and almost blurry picture of me (she showed me the picture) and she didn’t understand why i wasn’t happy and replied with “but, we’re not…. Seeing eachother, we’re in a relationship, for me seeing someone is dating” and she told me “i know, but for me seeing someone is telling them i’m in a relationship with them, you know i don’t like to flaunt it anymore since my relationship with my ex ended”
Now. 3 Days after our 5 Month anniversary i get to meet all her relatives from her dad’s side (i already met her parents about 2 weeks in) and all was well, we had a fun day. Had a fun evening and nothing was going on. Next day it was easter and we’d go to my mom and have lunch there. Yet she’s more quiet than usual but she had some trouble with her mouth which had an infection of some sort, so understandeable.
We go out shopping for fish later, and she bought me cutlery, she drives home later that day and in the evening we have a video call. During that video call she tells me “i’ve told x about us” (that online friend) i blurt out “oh, that’s a relieve” because that’s how i felt it at that moment. Why did it take her so long for her to tell him, especially with her accepting gifts from him, making plans to meet up with him and us having a few discussion about it because i saw it as unhealthy that he didn’t know yet. Since i DO find it healthy to tell the people you’re close with about someone you’re in love with.
Anyway. I told her that, and i could see her face change, 5 Minutes later she hangs up after wishing me good night and telling me she loves me. 1 Day later we call again, she kept telling me about “i hope your friends don’t hate me now that i’ve made this decision” (i was still unaware about what she was on about since she hadn’t discussed “this decision” with me) anyway.
The next day she wanted to talk in person but it wasn’t going to be “an easy conversation” well.. Sure. We talk, she ends it by breaking up with me because i was insecure/jealous/controlling by wanting her to tell him about us. And she told me how wrong i was for thinking that about him because he’s “just a friend”
Now comes the fun bit, right? Let’s just say that, if you have to emphasize that he’s “just a friend” he isn’t “just a friend” i know, because i was “just a friend” too, until i wasn’t anymore. We broke up on the 3rd, her relationship with him started on the 5th, i know because: Where she was hiding me from everybody apart from her family members, she put him on social media like i never happened.
So, long story short. Relationship was with a 9 Year age gap (at the end of our relationship i had just turned 33) we had a different idea of what healthy was in a relationship, she couldn’t get her head around what i found healthy and that i obviously asked questions about excessive texting and she broke up with me and make me have trust issues for a loooooooooooooooooong time.
Started dating again 3 Months after the break-up, with little succes. There was one woman who saw a lot of potential in me, and i saw potential in her, but if physical attraction is missing then unfortunately it ends for me.
I was 17 she was 28. I learned alot.😂
It’s not much older but I have dated a couple of women that were 5-6 years older. They wanted to be taken care of like many women do, but when it came to certain things, necessary things it’s “I’m X years old nobody is going to make me do anything.” Type shit.
I recently got out of a relationship with someone 19 years younger (she pursued me, I’d never hit on someone that much younger than me, but I won’t immediately disqualify them just for being 23) she is super sweet and fun, sexy, funny, but she is low on empathy, dishonest and irresponsible, I don’t know if it was a maturity thing or a character defect. With all that said it was one of the better relationships I’ve had, but it was never meant to last. Then she changed her mind and now wants kids, or so she said.
I have dated women as much as 32 years younger than me, am married to a woman 27 years younger than me, and have dated or slept with 127 women who were 20 years or more younger than me. How were they all? Absolutely wonderful.
I was 19/20 and she was 50ish. She had a son my age and two older I never met plus three younger. Her husband just took off and left her I think. I never got the whole story. We were more FWB. I was in the Marines with her son. We were in different squadrons but friends. I helped him move her and his younger siblings from Oregon to Southern California. She and I had a nice friendship and often walked the beach together in the evening. On night while watching the sunset she took my hand and slide it down her blouse to her breast and told me let-s go someplace before this happens on the beach. I was so inexperienced and awkward. but she was patient and taught me a lot. I learned I liked eating my cum from a freshly fucked pussy from her. Got me into watersports. We fucked almost daily for close to a year before I got orders and was shipped to another duty station. She was so horny all the time and always wanted to fuck no matter where we were. I really missed her when I left.
Both of my ex wives were at least 7 years younger than me. So there is that.
When I was 26 I messed around with 42 yo woman. She turned me on to a weird kink or 2. Just about everything else was a shitfuck.
When I was 35 I dated a 26 yo. I consider her to be my best relationship even though it ended.
Never been with someone significantly younger.
I’m 51. She’s 25. We’ve been together 4 years now and things are going great. She’s recently moved to a city that’s a little ways away (hour long flight, six hours drive) but we’re managing the distance really well I think. She moved for a PhD program and we have plans to reunite during her post doc. For now, we see each other a couple times a month.
My friends were skeptical at first, but they are all in love with her at this point. She’s an amazing person. Her family was pretty easy to win over.
One thing I recommend for any guys out there who are interested in a serious relationship with a younger woman; talk to your friends who are women. Hopefully you have a few. I talked to three friends when I first started seeing my girlfriend and asked for their advice. All three of them started out by saying, “yeah, when I was younger, I dated an older man for a little while…” And then they told me all the things that their older men partners did that made them feel uncomfortable or pressured or manipulated. Then I went back to my GF and said, “here’s all the things I’ve heard from friends who had age gap relationships in the past. These are the things I want us to avoid.”
We went in with eyes wide open, communicated a ton, had a lot of check-in conversations even when things were going well and I think that’s all made our relationship stronger and healthier.
I was 28 and she was 42. It was a blind date that went nowhere because as we got to know each other, she realized that she had seen me before, during her first year as a police officer when she was 22 and I was 8.
She had been responding to a domestic disturbance at my house. My parents were the town drunks.
I was 19 and she was 28. She pretty much used me as a boy toy. I thought we had something serious going on, but nope. I was young and dumb and only had 1 serious relationship before messing with her. It was fun while it lasted, but very toxic. She was extremely shady and my friends all warned me about her, but like I said, i was dumb and didnt know any better. Now that I think about it, it all makes sense. I kept telling my friends no she wouldn’t do this to me because when we were together in person, she made me feel like we were in a relationship, but when we’re not together, she would barely reply, and if we made plans to see each other, she would just ghost me when the day comes. This went on for about 7 months and I finally just ended it and met this new girl (my wife now) and the cougar became extremely jealous and I just blocked her.
Met someone online about a year ago. Typical progression. We clicked over the typical stuff. Shared humor and interests. We were, through an odd series of events, in very similar life phases. And she was absolutely gorgeous.
But once we became aware of the age gap, we knew what was up. This was not a long-term thing. Couldn’t be. There was a twenty+ year age gap, and crosa-cultural.
There was no way her family would go for it. No way my family would go for it. Not a chance in hell.
So we treated it like an affair, basically. We would meet in a parking garage, never went to each other’s houses. Our dates were secluded parks, cheap hotels, and outside the 45-minute “exclusion zone” around our town.
Her BFF and Cousin knew, and were cool with it, though we never met. She never met my ppl, and, while my friends and some family knew I was seeing someone, and I talked about her, I was vague on specifics, obviously. She had her bubble, I had mine, and we had ours, and never shall they meet.
Til they did. One of her aunts saw us together at a mall an hour outside town. Fortunately, she just lowkeyed it. Brought up to my GF at a quinceañera the next weekend. Asked about her “friend” from the mall.
At the same time, I had started to get more uncomfortable about my role as her partner. There was a constant analysis running in my head about whether I was helping her with the benefit of my experience, or keeping her from gaining valuable experience on her own.
So, when she called and told me our bubbles had touched, we popped it. We mutually agreed right away that that was that. Said our goodbyes, and haven’t spoken since.
It was fun, a whole lot of fun. We really, truly enjoyed each others company, and even shared whispered loves. She was great, and I don’t regret a bit of our time together.
Dated a girl for 3 months that was a decade younger than me. I was 32, she was 21. we had a lot in common, other than decision making. She was smart, but also a total flake. I found a Post-It note on my door one day that said, “Thanks, but there’s no feelings, just amazing sex, yada, yada, yada, found someone else.”
This is an easy one lol. Younger – Insecure, childish, immature, vindictive, and petty. Older – Judgemental, demeaning, condescending, never satisfied, you’re never good enough.
I grew up where lots of my family divorced and remarried and age gaps were/are everywhere. So ive dated a 43yr old when I was 19. I have had 2 serious relationships with those being significantly younger. And I am still with one of them. He messaged me first on an online dating app. So we just chat for a while and I asked if I am a fling or what am I to him. He said im his boyfriend. We are 19yrs apart. He told me hes tried dating people closer to his age and He said hell no. His family is all older than him so hes the baby and his family members didn’t really approve but told him if I love him and he loves me and we treat each other with full respect. Whats difficult i have found in dating someone with significant age gap is l have to remember a lot of everything is going to all be new to him. And communication is generally good but I have to slightly encourage to speak up. And he has been more and more as we have been together. We have been together for 4yrs. Sex is generally gonna be a big thing for some relationships. We’ve talked about an alternative relationship when older and just have that as blind hindsight of we just want to live in the moment. True Love is hard to find. I feel if you have true love theres compromises that benefits the couple. Also biggest gap I know is shes 26 and he is 63. I have also almost died so many times that I got a lot of Grey hair early on in age. So occasionally im asked if thats my son or grandson. To make things easy is just yeah. Had a woman I seen all the time at the gas station and when my partner came to live with me we would often go to the gas station together as it was just a quick walk around the block. I was in there by myself one day and she tells me is that your son? How old is he? My answer was just, no.
How many years is “significant?”
What doe significantly mean?