I was at this new café near my office, trying to act all mysterious and put-together — headphones in, laptop open, latte in hand. You know the vibe.
There’s this girl sitting across from me. Cute, reading a book. I think, “Okay… this is my main character moment.” I order a fancy chai latte (which I don’t even drink) just to seem cultural and deep.
They bring it in a glass mug — aesthetic AF — with a cinnamon stick floating on top. I take a sip. It burns a little. Whatever. I keep looking casually in her direction, hoping to lock eyes and maybe flash a half-smile.
Then I take a big sip. The cinnamon stick goes straight into my mouth and gets lodged sideways in my throat.
I start choking. Not like little cough-choke. I’m full on turning red, trying to cough it out while covering my mouth, looking like I’m dying in slow motion. People are turning around. The barista is confused. The girl is STAAAARING.
I manage to spit the damn stick out into a tissue. It’s soaked in chai and shame.
I try to act normal after like nothing happened, but the girl just got up, smiled politely (painfully), and walked away. TL;DR: Tried to look cool in front of a cute girl. Ended up choking on a cinnamon stick. I am now known as “chai guy” at my local café. Kill me.
Comments
Lmaooooo 😭
I’m so sorry though. I hope you’re okay. Psychologically and physically
If it’s any consolation, I went bowling a few weeks ago with this girl that I’ve liked forever and nearly choked to death on a particularly cheesy slice of bowling alley pizza. I’m 29.
Honestly, it’s hilarious, I mean, how does one even plan a cinnamon stick choking incident like that, and I’m genuinely curious, is it common to choke on them in cafes, or was this just spectacularly bad luck?
Oh my goodness, you’re kidding, I bet that chai latte wasn’t worth the embarrassment, and I’m pretty sure that barista will be telling that story for years, though I suppose it could have been worse, like falling face-first into a cake.
A fancy chai latte is not my go to sexy man drink LOL . Cinnamon stick!!!! Lmao not sexy even before u choked that’s so cringe ☠️
You rolled a 3 my friend.
If you rolled a one you’d have died.
Im certain I have similar memories, but they go into the vault.
Love the thought process behind buying the chai 🤣 gotta love an overthinker.
Based on how you write and the fact that you consciously thought “this is my main character moment” you didn’t have a chance to begin with so I wouldn’t stress about it
I did similar, except it was a fucking Pixie Stick and the powder congealed in my throat
You may not have impressed a girl choking on a cinnamon stick, but you may have impressed a man
The thought process 😹 oh u are indeed an mc in a story, just not that kind of mysterious aura farming mc
why do you think a woman would be impressed by you eating something? Especially while she’s reading? lmao the logic is so confusing
She probably felt you looking at her, and in her head was hoping you’d just stop. So you choking on the cinnamon stick was probably pretty cathartic and funny for her.
Hey, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m relieved that you didn’t actually choke to death. Listen, that girl wouldn’t have smiled at you if she thought anything negative at all. She was probably worried after seeing you almost need a Heimlich. If she’s worth her salt she’s going to figure out a way to run into you again. Go back to the cafe again a few times (for God’s sake order your usual, that’s cool enough) and see if she comes in. I’d bet you $20.00 right now that you’ll see her again next week People get awkward when they don’t know what to do.
If I were the girl, I would have thought this was funny. Hey! Mistakes happen, am I right?
To which you should have said, “and here I thought I’d choke on my words. Hi, I’m Potential Seat.” Would have been a great story to tell at your wedding.
Next on r/AITAH:
‘I (21F) was the cafe today, minding my own business, when this flamboyantly gay guy (he must have been because who else orders a chai latte, right?) instantly choked on what looked like a cinnamon stick and had a coughing fit. He seemed to come right, but my vibe was gone, and I decided to leave.’
‘As I was leaving I gave him what I hoped was a sympathetic smile, but it may have come across as pitying or worse.’
‘I told my flatmates and they said I was ok, but when I told mom she told the whole family and now they are blowing up my phone that I was an AH, so I’ve come here for judgment.’