So, I’m Vietnamese, but I’ve been in the US since I was six. Just got back to Nam, feeling all nostalgic and shit. Decided to grab a milk coffee from a street vendor. Looked innocent enough, big plastic cup, tasted pretty good.
Big fucking mistake.
I drank the whole thing. Every last drop. Now, I’ve smoked weed, I’ve even hit thuốc lào (Vietnamese pipe tobacco) – thought I was tough. But this coffee? This shit was on another level. My heart started doing a goddamn drum solo. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. I swear I was seeing sounds and hearing colors. It felt like I’d mainlined pure anxiety.
Ended up in the hospital, looking like a total dumbass. Pretty sure the doctors just laughed at the Americanized kid who couldn’t handle his coffee. They hooked me up to an IV and told me to chill the fuck out.
Seriously, Vietnamese coffee ain’t coffee; it’s a goddamn recreational drug. Never again. My heart’s still trying to escape my chest. Vietnamese coffee is fucked.
TL;DR: chugged street coffee, hospitalized by caffeine overdose.
Comments
I recently got a Vietnamese coffee (in the States) and had to drink it over three days.
LOL – did you have to poop immediately as well?
The type with condensed milk? Probably more sugar than caffeine!
i have had to stop getting coffee with my bahn mi because of this. i have a high tolerance for caffeine.
Viet coffee is on another level. I drink coffee like it’s water, doesn’t impact me. Viet coffee is the only thing that will get my heart racing and make me feel like I can do anything.
That shits like crack, no wonder we got our ass kicked in that war
Robusta coffee I bet
Don’t these typically have the same caffeine content as a Monster? I mean it’s a lot compared to regular coffee but shouldn’t be sending people to the hospital.
How do I obtain this coffee, may give me a good night’s sleep
I thought I was going to pass out in an airport after having no more than 1/4 of Vietnamese coffee. My heart was pounding, I was light headed, and needed to sit down for a good 20-30 minutes for symptoms to dissipate. I am not a big coffee drinker and knew it was strong so purposely only drank a portion, not thinking <100ml would send me in a total tail spin. I learned a valuable lesson that day.
I think this could be with the beans they’re using (Robusta) and most street vendors use a phin filter so it makes it more concentrated. Condensed milk masks the bitter taste so it entices you to drink it more.
If you ever get in the same situation again, you can try chewing some peppercorns.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Vietnamese coffee is often made using robusta beans which contain more caffeine than the typical Arabica coffee. Iirc the brew method typically extracts more caffeine than a drip brew, gets closer to espresso. It’s pretty potent stuff. The condensed milk really masks it well.
The only way caffeine affects me is chest pains if I have too much (I don’t even get energy), which is typically more than 2 strong caffeinated drinks in a day. A regular American espresso based drink with 2-3 shots usually is fine. I didn’t think this through when I went to a Vietnamese coffee shop near me – I knew it was strong, but I forgot. A large drink absolutely took me down for a day. It was tasty tho! Lmao. Glad you ended up being alright despite the embarrassment 🙂
I have a friend who can’t really handle caffeine. He once had Vietnamese coffee, it was a wild night that day.
You just hadn’t had enough.
It’s just coffee aka caffeine or there are other drugs in it?
There’s a Viet coffee place in San Diego I’ve been meaning to try.
Do Viet places in the US generally water it down so to speak, or is it legit?
Aw man when I went there, I just had coffee from coffee shops. It was good fsho but I think I want what you had. Should’ve gone to the streets😅
The best coffee (and chocolate) I’ve ever had was when I was in Vietnam. My AuDHD chronically ill ass was in delicious creamy self medicated heaven
Is Thai coffee similar?
Isn’t a glass of milk coffee there like 50/50 espresso and sweetened condensed milk?
Didn’t know they made coffee different. Had cuban and Turkish coffee and like it enough to make Turkish coffee at home. Anyone have recommendations on making it at home?
I’m so sorry, but you wrote this so good, I’m laughing my ass off. Hope, you’ll be better soon. Hugs
This made me bust out laughing at my desk.
I adore Viet coffee. I’m sure it’s different in MN than Vietnam but it hits soooo good on a Saturday. I sip on my cup all morning and then I have rockets on my feet the rest of the day.
You are a wordsmith.
Caffeine is no joke, that stuff will kill you easily. Like 1-2 grams will give you a very bad time.
Caffeine is a drug and can be dangerous. I was a paramedic for 30 years and the amount of people (young people) I lost count of the number I transported to the hospital after all those high caffeine “energy” drinks came out. It is no joke. Glad you’re OK
Reminds me of when I filled a Big Gulp with Vietnamese coffee to try to pull an all nighter once. I drank maybe a fourth of it before having heart palpitations, extreme jitters, and a good panicked cry before falling asleep shortly after.
bah samething as mcdonald’s coffee
hahaha last time i had viet coffee in the us i didnt sleep for dayyyzzz
Man I would love the try coffee like that. I used to drink cold brew concentrate when I was a new nurse on night shift to stay awake made it myself and called it rocket fuel because it would keep you awake for the rest of the night but it tasted like shit.
Did this with a 5 hour energy when I was hungover. I really should’ve gone to the hospital honestly but I just toughed it out sweating and laying on my bathroom floor. Never ever again.
“The opposite of being drunk, its as sober as you can ever be. It strips away all the illusion, all the comforting pink fog in which people normally spend their lives, and lets them see and think clearly for the first time ever. Then, after they’ve screamed a bit, they make sure they never get knurd again” – Terry Pratchett – Your coffee story made me think of this quote
Read like when Gabriel Iglesias discovered cubain coffee.
https://youtu.be/hmNOe94Kz3Q
i’m now ordering this type of coffee
Haha, that coffee’s no joke! Glad you’re okay now
Imma gonna go get some Vietnamese coffee .
I’ve gotten high off of drinking a cup of Vietnamese coffee in under 30 minutes
Vietnamese coffee is rocket fuel
I remember wandering into a Vietnamese coffee shop one time in a city in CA called garden grove and there were topless ladies serving coffee. I was not prepared for this.
I assume it’s robusta they use for those vietnamese coffees, what with it making up most of Vietnam’s coffee production and being relatively cheap?
That shit hits different, and gram for gram can have up to three times as much caffeine as the coffee you would normally drink. Doesn’t taste as nice as a rule, hence the milk and sugar!
Do you have the same problem with C4’s or other energy drinks?
Do you have the same problem with C4’s or other energy drinks?
The only time I’ve properly had caffeine withdrawal was leaving Vietnam after two weeks of bánh mì and a giant plastic jug of cà phê sữa đá for lunch almost every day. I’d do it again too. No regrets.
Was it made using an espresso shot or a filter brew? I have a Vietnamese filter coffee using a Phin most mornings, it’s so good! I prefer it black though, condensed milk makes me feel sick.
I’m guessing robusta.
Straight robusta! Someone gave me a can of Sang, which is 8oz and 250mg of caffeine… I haven’t dared open it yet.
I once had too much coffee and kicked a hackey sack over 30 times before it hit the ground
I would literally ✨pass away✨ (I had grande nitro cold brew once and had heart palpitations all through target. Couldn’t understand why my chest hurt and I felt so off until my husband pointed it out… sweaty, my veins vibrating. I can’t handle it.)
You should try brazilian coffe (from minas gerais to be more specific) and you’d feel some of that too. American coffee is like a potato water as we call here, is somewhat brownish and see through, without the taste of a single bean of the real stuff
Not gonna lie I love that feeling when consuming too much caffeine lmao.
Dam I think I need this coffee
I had two with breakfast because they were small I thought I would be fine.
I was still anxious and paranoid the next day probably because I could not sleep.
10/10 would try again but just one
Try smoking some “farmers tobacco” in Vietnam. You’ll swear it’s spiked with something.
So this is why my favorite Vietnamese restaraunt in my city summons the owner to my table on my second coffee order to cut me off lol
Now I want some!
It tastes so good too 😂
The place I go to uses vietnamese coffee in their machine so the ice in the iced coffee is literally more coffee.
Viet iced coffee got me through college. My first time drinking it was quite a ride though.
Man the thuoc lao is another level too. My friend whose lived there for 10 years or so now brings his travel one whenever he comes back and man smoking from it spins me out so badly everytime
i often skip breakfast and once my friend and i were in vietnam and had some coffee and nothing else, we then proceeded to take a bus to check out an old temple and we were basically stuck waiting for the next bus to come round, after having looked around, feeling dread and dying from over caffeination and probably minor dehydration and hunger and wow worse day ever lol.
So where can I find this in a western country??
>I swear I was seeing sounds and hearing colors.
so whats the name where this coffee was/is found? asking for a friend
Caffeine is a drug though. It’s like saying beer isn’t a drug since whisky is so damn strong.
Reminds me of that stand-up joke where the man drank too much Cuban coffee because he was mad they gave him a small cup. They gave him a small cup because it was highly concentrated.
Mhmmmmm delicious Cà phê… I’ll be back there in less than two weeks and I can already taste the Cà phê trứng that I’ll be getting within the first hour after landing.
What did you have specifically? Honestly if I die to Cà phê I’ll die happily (if not peacefully lol) I swear the fact that the beans are produced there and don’t have to get shipped across the ocean makes it better in every way, including caffeine content.
Reminds me of when I worked in a place that did good packaging. Filling hoppers for a machine that made those drink mix pouches for water bottles. After about 3 hours I swore people were messing with.me but couldn’t tell you how. Smelled amazing, a nice strawberry mix. Finally looked at the name of the product, a energy drink mix. When you pour powder into a hopper if fills the air nicely. After breathing that in for 3 hours I could see sideways in time.
I drink an iced coffee with espresso every morning. I’ll regularly follow that up with a monster or bang or something within a few hours. Vietnamese coffee is the only thing that has any effect on my poor undiagnosed ADHD brain. I had a large iced Vietnamese coffee and I couldn’t hear anyone over the sound of my own heart for 15 minutes. I want another one
AI garbage
I’m dying with laughter because you’re describing my first experience with Vietnamese coffee. We were eating a a hole in the wall outside a military base called Vietnamese Restaurant and I ordered a second cup after chugging my first. I waved off the concerns of the serving staff and insisted I could handle a second cup, I was hardened by years of living off nicotine, caffeine, and hatred.
That line from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, you know the one…I was nowhere near Barstow when the drugs began to take hold, but let me tell you it was an experience. I limit myself to one these days as a rare treat before 1 PM.
https://i.redd.it/9ff4xs4fm82f1.gif
Real life Super Hans moment?
American here. Drank a Vietnamese coffee while visiting Vietnam – at 3pm. By 3am, I was laying wide awake in my hotel bed, seriously considering going for a run. Last time I drank one of those in the afternoon!
Reminds me of the lovely Thai man that would come to my old Sbux every day and order 8 shots of espresso with 8 pumps of white mocha sauce on ice. A true legend.
Like how many milligrams are we talking here?!
We’re lucky, our Costco has Lee’s Vietnamese Iced coffee in the cold food section in a 6-pack. I made the mistake of drinking multiple times a day. But so sugary delicious and many heart palpitations and my eyeballs buzz! Is that ok?
My buddy owns a coffee shop in Nashville. We fondly refer to the Vietnamese coffee as the “Jet Fuel”
My guy…what you call Americano isn’t even coffee. It’s just coffee flavoured water.
But as you aren’t a native, yeah take it easy on the proper Viet Cafe. I’m not native but I can drink maybe 3 of the Vietnamese coffee shots before I need a nap.
Been there with sketchy drinks! Hope you’re okay now, thanks for the laugh!
K
I’m gonna need some details about where you got this coffee from (just curious defo not gonna fly out to Vietnam..)