This happened to me about two years ago, but I have just been reminded and feel that an adequate amount of time has passed so I will share it with you all! This post contains queasy inducing content so be warned.
I don’t wish to give out too many details but roughly two years ago I got an internship at a firm in my city. I was definitely the youngest in the office at the time, and this was my first time being in such an environment. Being young and now with a decent salary, naturally I had been taking advantage of my new monetary advances and had been enjoying the city’s nightlife with friends.
I want to say that I am not superstitious, but this event occurred on the eve of Friday the 13th and ever since I have remained vigilant to never repeat this again. It was a Thursday afternoon, and I had finished early. I didn’t have much work left so I called up my bestie and we decided to make dinner with some drinks. One thing led to another, and before we knew it, we had cleared an entire bottle of vodka with dinner. This was my first fuck-up.
At this point, naively believing that we weren’t drunk enough, another friend called us and invited us out to the club her boyfriend managed. Since we would be drinking for free and our night seemed young, we headed out and had a great time (or so we thought) before heading back home. Second bad decision of the night.
At this point I was insanely drunk and passed out the second we got back to my friend’s place. Usually after a night like this, I would’ve preemptively eaten and drank a ton of water to lessen any morning-after effects, but my body was done and it was lights out for me. You see where this is going.
The next morning I woke up feeling horrid. I immediately puked next to my friend’s bed and had to run to the sink to throw up the rest. I checked the clock and realized I had to be in the office in 30 minutes so I quickly cleaned up and headed back to the office.
At this point I should’ve called in sick but I thought that since I had thrown up already, I would be fine. Oh how wrong I was. Sitting on the train, I already started feeling woozy. As I got out, I literally projectile vomited onto the street as I headed from the station to the office building. Again, I really should’ve stopped myself, but again thinking, “that must’ve been all of it” I entered the office. I thought to myself that I needed some food in me to stabilize my insides, so I found some left-over tomatoes and cucumbers to eat with a coffee.
This was where the story starts to hurt my conscience. Not recognizing the acidity of the coffee and tomatoes, I went back to my desk thinking I would just take it easy. But my body had other plans, as I stared at my screen and started to feel nauseous again. In a mixture of fading in and out of consciousness and holding back more vomit I braced myself at my desk.
However, for some reason this day was also a grad-student touring day, and my coworker showed up with maybe 15 students in tow right by my desk. Since I was young and an intern, she started introducing me but my body snapped. I felt my mouth start to salivate and I knew what was coming. I jumped up, said “sorry gotta go” and SPED to the bathroom.
I was too late. Right as I reached for the bathroom handle, I felt it. My hand flew up to cover my mouth but that just made what happened next worse. I threw up with such force that the puke sprayed against my hand and flew EVERYWHERE. Against my clothes, the wall and the CARPETED FLOOR.
At this moment another intern had just turned the corner and witnessed what can only be described as a scene from a horror movie. She looked in shock as I stood there and said “are you okay??” I looked up, “nope” I said, and proceeded to enter the bathroom.
Bless his soul, my supervisor was in that day so I called him from the bathroom, begging for help. Thankfully he had an extra shirt for me and showed up with a whole ventilator mask as he threw the shirt from a distance and told me to go home. I left as fast as I could and got a car to take me back. This was also a terrible idea because the car made me more nauseous and I threw up two more times before arriving home. I ended up sitting alone, ashamed and feeling like death, contemplating my existence.
TL;DR: I drank waaaay too much on the eve of Friday the 13th and wrongly proceeded to go to work hungover and feeling like death. This prompted me to throw up multiple times, one of which being in the hallway of my office where people were subjected to the horror of my self-made biohazard.