TIFU by eating super spicy food

I’m not very good at handling spice. Even if I fight through the burning sensation on my tongue, my body’s insides will suffer. Thing is, I love a good Chinese spice bag and since my dad wanted to order some takeaway, I figured I’d go for it.

It came and I ate it. It was practically brown with spice and covered in chilli, my mouth was on fire the moment it hit my lips. But I didn’t wanna waste my dad’s money by not eating it, so I kept going. In the end, I couldn’t finish the whole bag. I felt something kinda snap in my stomach and figured, “Okay, I’ve reached the limit, I’ll stop here so it won’t get worse.”

Oh. Dear. GOD.

It did not last long until I needed to go to the bathroom. Again, I figured that I’d throw up once, get it out of my system and I’ll move on. I was not prepared to meet the demon that was brewing somewhere between my stomach and my intestines.

I stayed in that bathroom, on the toilet for was felt like several hours. My body just sweating and freezing at the same time as my ass practically learns how to piss now. Throwing up what felt like days of food but still wanting to bring up more, but there’s nothing left. I’m stuck in a never-ending cycle of wanting to hurl but can’t anymore, whilst my rear end shoots out fireworks like it’s fucking New Year’s.

It’s the next day now and I’m terrified to ingest anything other than water. Even the smell of that damned spice bag makes me want to gag, like it’s alerting the devil that rests in the depths of my bowels. I don’t want to wake him, yet he does when he feels like he hasn’t gotten his revenge on me. It’s just water out my ass and I’m sitting here, wondering when I’ll finally die.

TL;DR: I ate a food so spicy that my body is punishing me, letting me know the consequences of my actions.