TIFU by giving my dad edibles before church

r/

So my dad (62M) recently retired, and has been more “open-minded” about trying new things. We live in a legal state, and I’ve been using edibles to help with anxiety. He got curious and asked if he could try one “sometime.”

Well, “sometime” turned into last Sunday morning, when he casually reminded me at breakfast that he wanted to try one. I thought, sure, why not. I gave him half a 10mg gummy and explained it takes about an hour to kick in.

Here’s what I forgot: we were scheduled to attend my niece’s church recital at 10:30AM.

We walk in, take our seats, and about 10 minutes into the service, my dad starts swaying like he’s hearing the voice of God directly in surround sound. He leans over and whispers, “Why does the pastor look like he’s melting?”

I nearly passed out trying not to laugh.

Halfway through the choir performance, he stood up and clapped early. Not even polite clapping, full-blown standing ovation. Then sat down and cried.

We dipped out early. In the car he said, “That was the most spiritual thing I’ve ever experienced.”

I am never taking this man to church again.

TL;DR: Gave my retired dad a weed gummy before forgetting we had to attend a church event. He tripped mid-sermon and clapped for Jesus.

Comments

  1. Tremenda-Carucha Avatar

    I hate to admit it, but I’d probably have joined him in the standing ovation if I were there… just not sure I’d have cried quite as much.

  2. Agitated-Ad6744 Avatar

    You definitely should have read the revelations of John to him.

    Coulda done some real damage lol

  3. damegan Avatar

    Hahahahaha sounds like you helped your old man find enlightenment 🤣

  4. Crispee_chikin Avatar

    Dad got high at church clapped early and cried. Never again!

  5. Enginerdad Avatar

    I think we just proved the origin of religion: mind altering chemicals

  6. ChocolatePain Avatar

    Giving someone edibles for their first marijuana experience is usually a bad idea, but sounds like it somewhat worked out for you guys. 

  7. awsm-Girl Avatar

    “half a 10mg gummy” and the man is trippin’ — cries in 100mg

  8. souvlakiviking Avatar

    Wtf was in that gummy, acid? I thought it would just be THC

  9. dullawolf Avatar

    As a partaker in edibles, maybe I’m just unique, but I never had anything remotely close to that happen to me. I just get super mellow. No hallucinating, no swirly colors, no trip to the moon. I just feel super mellow and depending how much I take, I can compare the feeling to being buzzed to slightly drunk but super mellow.

  10. RelsircTheGrey Avatar

    Like Karl Marx said, religion is the THC of the masses.

  11. tracksloth Avatar

    Dude this was so good. I needed a good laugh. Damn. Bravo.

  12. LeFreeke Avatar

    Things were melting from a 5mg gummy? That’s some powerful MJ.

  13. xgrader Avatar

    This could easily be a sitcom episode. Funny stuff!

  14. busy_monster Avatar

    I’m high in church
    I’m high in church
    Oh Lord forgive me
    This is the worst

    I’m high in church
    I’m high in church
    Oh God please help me
    This is the worst – Trevor Moore

  15. WhitDawg214 Avatar

    They should start doing “Half Gummy” Morning Services.

    Pews would be packed.

  16. Andre4k9 Avatar

    you didn’t take him to church… you took him to heaven 💀 this is the kind of sermon he’ll be chasing for life

  17. sometranscryptid Avatar

    i don’t think you fucked up

  18. falconshadow21 Avatar

    Nice bonding experience

  19. _Allfather0din_ Avatar

    “why is the pastor melting” yeah weed doesn’t do that, you should get him checked for latent schizophrenia, if you have visual hallucinations while taking weed there is a deeper psychosis at play.

  20. scf714 Avatar

    This is the best thing that I’ve read in years. I’m literally laughing out loud. Thank you OP for making my week complete!

  21. ElSoMaLu Avatar

    I wish I could have seen that. Sounds like an amazing once in a lifetime moment. 😂

  22. grimydude Avatar

    Stories like these get ruined when people claim they’re just using marijuana and then say shit like “blah is melting” never in any form of marijuana have I ever experienced such a thing or heard anyone that actually smokes describe anything like that

  23. lordreed Avatar

    Rumour has it that Moses’ burning bush, was actually burning kush, which made him see god.

  24. Scary-Alternative-11 Avatar

    🤣🤣🤣🤣 Oh, i wish I was there to see this!!! The first time I tried edibles, I went too hard, had a full-blown panic attack, and hid in my besties garage, convinced the cops were coming for me, even though it’s legal!!

  25. EvanTurningTheCorner Avatar

    I gave my dad a CBD gummy that, according to the label, had no THC in it. He told me it made him feel like he was losing his grip on reality and was way too heavy for him.

  26. home_ec_dropout Avatar

    u/bot-sleuth-bot