So let me preface this with my heads really not in a great place recently and I struggle over messages due to autism, so I met a girl online and we got to know each other a little, started chatting daily and eventually I caught feelings, she’s literally perfect, caring, stunning, funny and highly intelligent, I have no idea what she saw in me but I was over the moon until I fucked up, so it was a day we were meant to be meeting up but she was ill and she hadn’t been herself the last few days due to being ill but this day she woke up and she was back to herself, greeted me the way she use to seemed her self again, then I asked her a dumb question and brought mental health issues into the question which had no place being in the question and had nothing to do with it, one did not affect or mean anything with the other and I shouldn’t have said it, since she’s pulled away and I know from talking to her when she’s done with someone she’s done no second chances so I know there’s no hope of getting things back to how they were, I had to unfollow her social media because it hurts seeing the posts and knowing that I hurt that gorgeous, kind beautiful soul but there’s nothing I can do to make it up to her, I apologised but she’s done and now I’ve lost the one person who made me want to be better and get better physically and mentally and I know what I did was a real piece of shit move and I regret it more than anything I’ve ever done in my life, I’ve never dealt with anyone with this particular mh issue but I said many times I wanted to learn about it so I could understand better and support better but by bringing it into a sentence I destroyed everything and worst of all I hurt her and I’ll never get the chance to make it up to her. I hope she finds someone who is more considerate and truly makes her happy, she deserves it.
TL;DR I was a piece of shit and brought mh issues into a question and hurt the one person a cared most about and now I’ve lost her.