(Keeping a few details vague for privacy)
So today at work we were celebrating our company’s 100+ year anniversary. It was a big deal — music from local high schools, hot dogs, ice cream, the works. One of my coworkers brought in headbands that said “Happy Birthday!” because our mascot is a person. It was a cute gesture.
Naturally, a lot of people who came in thought it was someone’s birthday — either mine or one of my coworkers’. At first, I kept correcting people and saying it was the company’s birthday. But as the day went on (and since I was closing), the few of us still wearing the headbands decided: “If someone says happy birthday, we’ll just say thank you.”
Me, being the chaotic good I am, took it a step further and started saying it was my birthday. My manager and coworkers knew I was joking and let me have my fun. People asked how old I was, and I even had a fake age ready. (I will not be disclosing it for maximum mystery.)
After work, I kept the headband on. My boyfriend and I went out for food and stopped by our favorite local card shop we hadn’t visited in a while. The workers there recognized us right away and asked if it was my birthday.
“Yup,” I said, fully committed.
We were short 13¢ on a $16.13 purchase, and one of the newer employees (who still recognized us from past visits) offered to cover it. Then another worker chimed in about a birthday deal they do. My boyfriend and I were both like oh nooooo.
And THEN — the worker says my actual birthday out loud (they must have it on file or something??). Panic.
So I panicked even harder and said, “Actually, it’s my boyfriend’s birthday! Mine is today.”
They still gave us $5 off, the guy got his dollar back, and we got our cards.
So now… I have a reminder in my phone for my fake birthday in case this ever comes up again.
Should I tell them the truth? Probably. Will I? I don’t know. For now, June 7th is my new accidental fake birthday.
Also — happy actual birthday to anyone born on June 7th. Y’all are the real MVPs 🎉🎂
TL;DR:
Work was celebrating its anniversary, so we wore “Happy Birthday” headbands. People thought it was my birthday, so I jokingly said it was. Kept the bit going through the day, even at a local card shop I used to frequent. Got caught in the lie but panicked and said it was my boyfriend’s birthday too. Got a discount. Now I have a fake birthday reminder in my phone. Oops.