I (30M) have been dealing with ED for a while—mostly weak erections and soft glans. It crept in slowly and got worse over time. I assumed it was because of my sedentary lifestyle, so I started working out, eating better, and getting more sleep. After a few months with no improvement, I got seriously worried and started looking for answers.
That’s when I came across some info about pelvic floor dysfunction in men. It mentioned tight pelvic muscles being a possible cause. That’s when it hit me—I’ve been subconsciously clenching my pelvic floor muscles for years, without even realizing it. Probably made worse by frequent masturbation and stress.
Out of curiosity, I tried a few kegels. Almost immediately, I noticed a big difference—my erection was nearly back to full. Still having some soft glans issues, but it was the first real improvement I’d seen.
Later, I read that doing kegels with already tight pelvic muscles can make things worse, so now I’ve paused them and shifted to yoga, deep breathing, and relaxing stretches. Planning to ease back into kegels once things loosen up a bit.
If you’re dealing with unexplained ED, don’t overlook your pelvic floor. You might be clenching without even knowing it.
TL;DR:
Had ED for a while, assumed it was lifestyle. Turns out I’d been clenching my pelvic muscles for years. Kegels helped, but now focusing on relaxing first. Progress is real—hoping for a full recovery.
Edit:
I wanted to share symptoms that led me to arrive at this self diagnosis:
1. Feeling that urine has not drained fully, sometimes a few drops leak after a few seconds of peeing.
2. trouble closing and locking down the tube after peeing
3. Much to my embarrassment, I started to fart when coughing on occasion. Very rarely but I was very concerned. At least it wasn’t in front of anyone since I wfh.
4. I sit for long hours in front of my computer for work and play.
That said, I am going to see a pelvic floor physiotherapist soon as many comments suggested. If you do face similar symptoms, it’s best to do the same.
Edit 2:
The pelvic floor contracts and relaxes multiple times a day for various normal activities like lifting weights, sneezing and coughing. Please do not confuse this with what I did. I basically clenched for longer periods of time without letting go. This happened on a regular basis for years. Don’t be scared if you feel your kegels tighten for a short while, that’s entirely normal. Thanks u/ACBstrikesagain
Comments
Yeah visit a doctor for that, hope everything works out!
what stretches
I’ll save y’all a search, this is from the Mayo Clinic:
“How to do Kegel exercises for men
To get started:
Find the right muscles. To find your pelvic floor muscles, tighten the muscles that you use to keep from passing gas or to stop urinating midstream. These actions use your pelvic floor muscles. You also can place your finger into your anus and squeeze as if trying to hold in urine. A feeling of tightness on your finger means you’re squeezing the pelvic floor muscles. Once you’ve found the right muscles, you can do Kegel exercises in any position. At first, you might find them most easy to do while lying down.
Perfect your technique. Tighten your pelvic floor muscles. Squeeze them for three seconds, and then relax for three seconds. Try it a few times in a row. When your muscles get stronger, you can do Kegel exercises while sitting, standing or walking.
Keep your focus. For best results, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles. Try not to flex the muscles in your stomach area, thighs or buttocks. And don’t hold your breath. Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
Repeat three times a day. Aim for at least three sets a day. Work up to doing 10 to 15 Kegels in each set. You could aim to do these sets in different positions. For example, you could do one set lying down, one set seated and one set standing. You also can ask your healthcare professional to make a Kegel exercise plan that’s tailored just for you.”
Edit: Formatting
I’m a woman but had a similar issue (instead of ED, I have the bladder strength of an elderly person), definitely look into seeing a pelvic floor therapist. It will change your life.
There are physical therapists who specialize in pelvic floor dysfunction. Might be something that would help you.
I would avoid doing kegels as that just further tightens those muscles.
There is a book called ‘A headache in the pelvis’ that you might find interesting as well.
As soon as I read this I instantly realised I had my pelvic muscles clenched 😭
For a brief moment, I was confused about the relation between your pelvic muscles and an Eating Disorder
Yup, same thing happens in women (basically) as well… I grew up in the “suck your stomach in so you don’t have a muffintop in your hip huggers” era and was always stressed, which ended up where I had the habit of constantly tensing my abdominal and pelvic muscles. Finally figured this out after sex started being excruciating, leaving me curled in the fetal position sobbing for hours. I ended up having to do PT which is super awkward in that situation, and involved something called dry needling where they stuck acupuncture needles in my ass muscles while they twitched like they were trying to break free and run screaming away from my body. Don’t recommend it haha, remember to relax!!
I highly recommend you see a pelvic physical therapist.
I’ve got my finger in my ass but I forgot what to do next.
What the fvck is a male pelvic floor and how do we clench those muscles? I know what a kegle is.
I imagine taking a dump will be pretty magical from now on too…
Kind of related but I’ve been unconsciously keeping my lower stomach muscles tight for a while and I think that has contributed to bowel movement issues.
Once I started belly breathing regularly the issues got better.
Well well well, so all this time finger popping your ass is just an exercise called Kegels?
Is the glans not supposed to be soft?
Also men remember, shitting should only take 5-7 mins. Sitting on the toilet on your phone for prolonged periods of time can make your pelvic floor tighter as well.
Cardiovascular is important, there is major association between ED and vascular issues.
Hey! Please consider seeking a consultation from a pelvic health physical therapist. They specialize in this and they can teach you the best exercises to do – sometimes kegels are appropriate and sometimes not!
Nice glans, bro
Explore reverse kegals
Wife catches me with fingers in my bum again
“DAMNIT WOMEN IM DOING MY EXERCISES I TOLD YOU NOT TO DISTURB ME”
I found that floor bridges and dead bugs really helped my pelvic floor. I’m a woman so my issues were more about stress incontinence (that means you pee when you sneeze and such), but you might add these if they aren’t in your regimen. You may find it helps.
Also, my PF PT a long time ago taught me how to not only Kegel, but to squeeze back to front vs side to side. Also, if you are squeezing back to front, you are also moving your tailbone – which is what I was in PT for, so you can then start to learn to wag your tailbone and move it in circles. So yeah, now I have a limber pelvic floor. You might try to find all of these muscles. It may help you to loosen it up.
If you haven’t already. Consider meeting with a pelvic floor physical therapist. I had trouble for years after my vasectomy. Started doing pelvic floor therapy and my life has completely changed. It’s so weird how you don’t notice clenching those muscles until it’s pointed out. I was having trouble with premature ejaculation. Totally fine now. And no more pain in my gooch.
What is a soft glans issue?
That’s quite a story. Kudos for you for investigating and solving the problem, and especially for sharing your findings.
What does it feel like to have it clenched? You tried kegels and realized you already had it contracted?
New fear unlocked
Have you gone to a doctor instead of self diagnosis ?
ED is a leading indicator of heart disease. The standard american diet greatly promotes heart disease and thus ed. Nutritionfacts.org has some great info in easy to digest short videos. It’s really helped me.
Just in case you can’t fully resolve it yourself: pelvic floor physical therapists are also a thing
I thought clenching it was good? Thats what you do during the exercises right? Shouldn’t this have helped you?
Tons of vids on pelvic floor release online. They helped me a ton. Never had ED from it but did have frequent peeing and other prostate-type issues. Also look into strengthening glutes and stretching the PSOAS.
Basically if this happens to you, just start stretching all the time and it goes away.
This is kind of interesting. I “discovered” the vestigial ability to retract my testicles into my body, like animals and sumo wrestlers do, when I was 18 and on an acid trip. Since then I can do this at will, and it’s the “kegels” that are the secret to this. It’s also “enabled” (I put quotes around it because it’s not that great) to extend my sexual reaction, as I use these same muscles to hold back before I ejaculate. Really not as fun as it sounds, the first time I had sex I basically went for 8 hours before I came – and I had to use fantasizing to make it happen. That was at 21 years old, and at 57 I can assure you that this is not fun. It’s made it difficult for me to ejaculate my whole life.
Now, due to low-T, I have ED on top of that. Good times.
Go see a pelvic floor therapist. You might need to call around to find one who works with men. It’s a subset of physiotherapy specialized in pelvic floor issues. Often they might be called “women’s specialist” but it’s worth calling and see if they’ll help you. Typically they bill as a registered physiotherapist so insurance may cover it.
Pelvic floor work is WAY more than just kegals. Plus doing keglas with an overly tight pelvic floor can cause issues too. See a professional a few times, get the exercises correct. It’s worth it.
Have you been to a physician for a recent physical? You make it sound like you are diagnosing yourself rather than getting professional assistance. One of the oldest medical truths, attributed to Sir William Osler, is that he who treats himself has a fool for a patient. Get checked out, fully and professionally, your life may depend on it.
“I’ve been subconsciously clenching my pelvic floor muscles for years, without even realizing it.”
“I tried a few kegels. Almost immediately, I noticed a big difference”
These two confuse me, because if the first statement is true, and the cause of the ED, it seems like the second statement would be making that worse, since kegels are just intentionally clenching pelvic floor muscles?
I’m literally dealing with this exact thing, practicing pelvic floor releases! Lots of money spent with docs and specialists for a simple few exceptions
Huh?
Your orgasms must be legendary
Mostly the same symptoms and realized I basically do this 24/7 too 🤔
Wanted to jump in as a Psychotherapist. I work with people w ED using a somatic approach to therapy alongside physio as this often has a emotional and psychological part to it. If you have ED, best mental health options are Somatic Experiencing, Brain spotting, EMDR, ISTDP, or Sensorimotor Psychotherapy.
https://www.reddit.com/r/PudendalNeuralgia/s/PzepIai4g9
https://www.reddit.com/r/PudendalNeuralgia/s/PgAFfVHjz2
I hope you’re keeping up the improved diet and lifestyle
I had this as well. Doing standing kegels and holding maximum strength for one sec than completely releasing for another sec. 6 sets of 10 followed by 6 sets of holding at like 60% strength while simultaneously being able to breathe fully and exhale for 10 secs without letting go of the kegel and then release. That brought my erection strength back to top top shape to how it was when I was 19 almost lol
Sitting in front of your computer for long hours is a symptom of ED? 🤔 I’ve been doing it for years 😳
off topic but what is halal porn 😂
For those who have similar issues there’s a Reddit sub Prostatitis which includes chronic pelvic pain
I see this kind of issue all the time, but just saying do kegals to men it’s overly simplistic and can actually cause these erection problems if you’re not careful. Kegels can help strengthen your pelvic floor, but doing them five times a day without understanding your body’s needs can lead to your pelvic floor becoming too tight. This can cause pelvic floor dysfunction, which can make you last less time, feel discomfort, or even experience spasms.
What’s often missing is the need for balance. Your pelvic floor needs to be both strong and relaxed. That’s where reverse kegels come in. Reverse kegels focus on relaxing the pelvic floor muscles, which is just as important as strengthening them. Without relaxing, your pelvic floor can become overly tense, which can lead to problems.
Stretching and mobility exercises are also crucial. Deep squats with proper form and using a foam roller to target your hips, glutes, and lower back can help ensure your pelvic floor is fully stretched and functional. A tight, inflexible pelvic floor can be just as bad as a weak one. Your pelvic floor needs a full range of motion to work properly.
Your pelvic floor spasms during orgasm, so if it’s too tense, it can actually make you finish faster. Instead of just doing kegels five times a day, focus on a mix of strengthening with kegels, relaxing with reverse kegels, and stretching. It’s about balance, not just tightening the muscles.
I have to ask, did you notice an unusual tightness between your thighs? Like it never quite relaxed or always felt tense? I’m asking because my whole pelvic floor always feels strangely tight, and I’m wondering if this could be a sign of what you experienced. I also have a very sedentary job, so I spend a lot of time sitting down. ED medications help, and I’m looking into low-T treatment (because that’s low as well), but this struck a chord with me because of that odd tightness.
FYI, your physical therapist is going to shove a finger in your ass.
I didn’t know this either when I was diagnosed with pelvic floor dysfunction. Quite the shock.
The Too Long Didn’t Read was just as long🤣🤣 I don’t mind though! Been worried about this shit for a while
Yo… same age as you also having the same issue…
Go see a pelvic floor physical therapist. The vast majority of people should absolutely NOT be doing kegels.
Doctor, now… put the internet down before you do something unrepairable.
Honestly : reverse Kegel are the way to go and really easy to do. You just do as you pee and keep at it for ~3-5 seconds. It helped tremendously in my case as well
Yes I got prostatitis from tense pelvic muscles. I was going through a divorce and was stressed/wasn’t sleeping
What does soft glands mean??
“Clench pelvic floor” is that not the definition of Kegels?
bookmarked
Dude. See a doctor. Dont take info you find on the internet as gospel. Check with an actual expert.
Glad to know I’m not alone.
Bros been clenching full time like he’s in the final seconds of a BR when the ring/storm/gas closes up.
You should also speak with a dr. There’s a medical condition that makes it so you can’t voluntarily relax your own muscles.