I (F27) was invited to my college roommate’s wedding this past weekend. She’s very glam, very curated, and everything in this wedding was planned to the letter, colors, flowers, even guest attire suggestions. I wanted to look my best, so I bought a self-tanner the night before to give myself a “natural glow.”
Only I didn’t read the bottle.
Turns out it was an instant tanning mousse with a bronzer built in, and it stains. I didn’t realize that until after I’d applied it at 10 p.m., fell asleep on white sheets, and woke up looking like a goddamn Dorito.
Not only were my palms bright orange (rookie mistake), but I had streaks on my legs from where I sweat in my sleep. I looked like a tiger in a bridesmaid dress.
To top it off, the wedding had a white satin seating area. I sat. I stood. I turned to walk away and there it was: a perfect tan-ass print.
TL;DR: Used self-tanner the night before a wedding without reading the label, stained my skin, the bride’s seat cushion, and my dignity.
Comments
You stained the white satin seat through your clothes?
Account born on April 9, this is the first post. No comments. Take that for what you will.
Um. How did the “white satin seating area” get stained again? Your bare butt parked on it? In public?
This doesn’t add up.
Did you not shower? The bronzer washes off. You’ll look “muddy” the next morning, but showering the next day tones it down, and will remove the bronzer, so you don’t stain anything.