I had an important exam today, I have been studying for this exam for over 8 months now, I have spent more than $1500 on registrations and signing up for exam and another $600 on prep materials alone.
I was studying all night, I slept for a while, and missed all my alarms, I knew I wouldn’t make it on time, I ran a little, took subway/metro in my country and took a cab and ran again but I was late by 10mins.
Just 10mins costed my entire career now, I’m in no state to afford to take that exam again, it will be marked as fail even though I didn’t sit and have to re-register the entire process. So I don’t think I’ll be able to take that exam anytime soon. No dates available to take that exam for atleast 5months.
I haven’t said anything to anyone, I had a panic attack in washroom, stayed there for almost 2 hours and then, I took myself on a date to nearby museum, went to taco bell, I know don’t judge me please. Came back home still haven’t accepted the fact that my entire year hardwork, I blew it in air for being 10mins late because I overslept.
I messed up my chance of moving to different country for higher education. I can’t do this mentally too, I have been struggling with depression for almost 6 year and have kept it hidden from everyone.I don’t enough mental strength to take this exam again and I don’t even know what to tell my parents(I’m Asian). My older sibling are in Ivy league for masters and I was to join them in the country. I know they won’t say anything but I can already feel their disappointment. I was straight As student but fell into depression and started having anxiety and have ended up with mediocre grades. This exam was to redeem myself but yeah, I fucked up big time. Writing this here because I still don’t have courage to call anyone and tell them without having a breakdown.
TL:DR I bombed an important exam, overslept, was late by 10mins, had to redeem myself but I messed up.
Comments
You didn’t fail, you hit a rough moment. Rest, breathe, recover. One exam doesn’t erase your worth
It’s not the end of the world, you can try again right? And you also have extra time to work hard and ace that exam. Just don’t blame yourself. In my language we use a word which basically means that you never know, this is still good fortune that is preventing you from something bad that could happen
Feels like the end of the world but it isn’t. Let the dust settle, figure out your next steps and do it. You’ve learned an expensive fucking lesson but you’ll find a way to make some lemonade outta this.
Good luck
Damn that sucks. But it sounds like an honest mistake. Except for the Taco Bell, that shit’s on you 😂
Skill
You didn’t blow a year of work you just hit a pothole on a really hard road. One missed exam doesn’t erase your discipline, your dreams, or your worth. Rest now, grieve if you need to, but this isn’t the end. It’s just a brutal chapter, not the whole book.