My husband (30/M) and I (31/F) have been together for over 10 years. Over this time we have had some dry spells but typically we have sex once a week. I used to think that was normal but now I know the average for our age should be twice a week. Anyway, I have been satisfied with this frequency but he has a very high sex drive and would prefer us to have sex daily. I try to point out to him that this is unrealistic but I think he has some idea in his head, maybe from porn, that most women are having sex with their partners daily. Now I will say that he definitely tries to have sex with me often and makes me feel physically desirable. I just have fallen into the stereotypical role where I do everything around the house (cooking, cleaning, etc) and most of the time view sex as an unnecessary chore that I’m too tired for but once a week.
Over the years I have caught him masturbating several times. In the shower, in the living room when he thinks I am asleep, and recently we had sex one night and he was already masturbating the next morning. He feels bad about his porn habit and has told me he feels he is addicted. I don’t really want to believe that my husband is addicted to porn so I’m looking to strangers on the internet for advice lol. He admitted to me that he masturbates to porn on a daily basis. From what he says it’s once a day only. In my mind, addiction is something he does frequently throughout the day (not just once a day) and something that interferes with his daily life. Apart from me feeling some type of way about it, it’s not really messing up his life. If I ask, he is honest with me about it (I hope). I would obviously prefer that he didn’t watch porn so frequently but I know I’m not satisfying his needs.
(A word of advice for all you single people: make sure your partner’s libido matches yours or you will have some trouble down the road)
Any thoughts?
TLDR: is it normal for men nowadays to be watching porn and masturbating daily when their partners didn’t have sex with them that day?
Comments
What do you expect him to do? He asks, you say no, he goes off to take care of his erection himself. His porn use clearly isn’t affecting his desire for you.