My partner’s friend—someone he’s had minimal contact with over the past 11 years—briefly met our daughter once, when she was four years old, for just three hours. After six years of no interaction, this woman abruptly reentered his life and immediately began inserting herself into our family. On the third day, she had her own child start calling my boyfriend “Uncle,” despite the lack of a meaningful relationship and the fact he had met him twice. She showered us with unsolicited affection, repeatedly referred to us with only terms of endearment, and didn’t even know our daughter’s name—I had to correct her multiple times. My children and I felt deeply uncomfortable around her.
She managed to get our daughter alone and told her that she wanted to buy six tickets to a concert our daughter wanted to attend—tickets priced at $2,000 each—but said she couldn’t because I was mad and she did nothing. She went further by asking our daughter what kinds of things she liked, and offered to secretly buy her makeup, as long as she kept it a secret from me and used her own father a cover. This behavior is manipulative and predatory—it clearly resembles grooming. Despite this, my partner refuses to confront her, refuses to acknowledge the harm, and will not cut ties. I believe she poses a serious emotional and psychological threat to our daughter and our family.
Unsafe adult around my daughter
r/Advice
Comments
They’re your kids too. If you truly feel like this adult is not safe, you can assert that your little kids are not allowed around her.
I should say that it’s not particularly weird for her kids to call your boyfriend uncle. I’m part Italian and I grew up calling family friends ‘uncle’ and ‘aunt’ and I’ve done the same with my kid. It’s just a term of endearment for adults
Does your partner at least begin this conversation with,
‘We all know this woman is crazy…..’?
I mean, we all have some crazy ass, but known benign people we have in our lives
Nutcase that is trying to separate your family from you. Might be one of these types that start out charming.. https://mindpsychiatrist.com/why-are-narcissist-nice-then-mean/
She needed a place to stay with her son for what was supposed to be two weeks – one month. In the first week she was telling my boyfriend she was looking for places, but making comments to me about staying for 4 months. I watched her son, fed him when he told me he hadn’t had food all day at 5:15PM and agreed to watch him the next day. That only fell apart bc I sent her a text telling her that their stay was affecting our family and she could not stay past the one month. She saw my text, went to my bf and asked if she she could stay for 4 months bc her son doesn’t want to “leave uncle Sandy’s”, he said yes bc she got him with the uncle Sandy… she then text me back “no” she wasn’t leaving. Took another month to get her out even though in the first week she bragged about making her famous ex pay her $60,000 cc bill and said many times she had other places to stay. She goes in and out of talking exactly like her 8 year old son, so much that we didn’t know who was talking to us when they first came. She keeps coming around. She knows to stay away from me, but approached my son the other day and kept calling him the term of endearment me and my partner use for him. I’m very uncomfortable.
Tht’s some serious red flag sh*t right there. If your partner won’t protect your kid, you gotta step up. Don’t let anyone mess with your family. Trust your gut and stay sharp
This woman sounds certifiably predatory, manipulative and dangerous.
You need to sit your BF down and tell him either SHE goes, or you will.
I’m assuming you’ve already told him about the love bombing/ grooming behaviors since you said he stated it was NBD.
Protect your kid.