Hi, reddit
First, I want to apologize for not responding to my previous post. I wrote it before leaving the house, and I immediately fell asleep when I got home.
Now, today’s events:
I decided to take a chance. While my husband was taking a bath, I used his phone. I found two numbers that matched the first one 11, but one of them was his sister’s, so that was out. I wrote down the second number on a piece of paper. I quickly put the phone away. But teen minutes later, my husband was still in the bathroom, so I took a chance again and checked his phone again. He and this number exchange two phone numbers every day: when he should be at work and when I’m already asleep (I fall asleep first, my husband goes to bed a little after midnight). They also had a lot of messages, but all of them from my husband boiled down to “how are you feeling?” and “do you need anything?”. No photos.
When it was time for me to go for a running, I took my phone and the number I had written down. I ran to the park, and called there. A woman answered almost immediately. An elderly lady. A truly elderly lady. Not his grandmother or anyone else in the family. But she was the “love”.
This is where it gets even weirder: I told her I was a friend of (my husband’s name). She told me she didn’t know who I was talking about, and I could tell from her voice that she wasn’t lying. She was genuinely confused. So I said that I was talking about the person she talks and texts with every day. She said, “Oh, you mean (definitely not my husband’s name)?”. I said yes. We had a conversation in which she praised him and called him her “another soulmate.” and “true angel”. She also asked me not to tell “(my husband’s) wife” about our conversation and that he helped her every day and asked me when he can visited her again. I was very confused. I made up a quick excuse and hung up. I got home an hour ago and… I still don’t know what to do.
I’m more confused than last time.
Comments
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It’s pretty wild how she claimed not to know the guy… You might want to casually drop his work schedule or some specific detail into conversation and see if she bites, maybe he’s messing with you both, but it’d be good to fact-check.
Ask your husband. Tell him you called the number and nothing else. Tell him to explain
You tell him you talked to “love” today and that if he lies again about what’s going on you’ll divorce him. Then stick to that and divorce him because you can’t trust someone who lies to you.
This is so intriguing, I have all sorts of scenarios running thru my head, mostly good right now though. Update me
Get a private investigator and trail him.
Do you think she’s old enough to have dementia and I hate to say it but is he either looking after her or taking advantage of her?
your husband has pretended to be someone else, he lies to this old lady, he lies to you.
Get therapy together or get a divorce 😕
Spending time trying to make sense of lies is time you could be spending on your feelings wishes needs goals etc.
Hope you are able to break free of the madness
when you get home say “I called that number and spoke with the woman you text every day. Why does she think your name is x?” Just ask directly and don’t let up until you have an answer.
I hope he isn’t scamming her. That was my first thought with an elderly lady. Because if he was just going there to do good deeds, why wouldn’t he tell you that and why would she say don’t tell his wife?
Put the piece of paper with her number on the table and ask him to explain himself. See what he says.
Are you sure she’s actually “elderly”? Or is that your (perhaps skewed) perception? But definitely just tell your husband that you called that number and talked to her, so you now know what’s going on, but you want to hear it from him. Do it soon, before she can talk to him and tell him about your call herself, and also to catch him off guard… you’re more likely to get the truth from him this way.
Oh no… is he scamming an elderly woman?
I don’t know which is worse, this or cheating
does grandma have a more age appropriate daughter?
This sounds like he may be scamming her for money. She says he’s helping her. He asks her what she needs. (What does she respond?)
Seems like he runs errands for her, and she pays him, or gifts him money.
Perhaps its a legit side job, but seems like there’s more to it (he’s scamming her), or he wouldn’t be lying about it.
Is it possible the woman he’s talking to lives with the elderly woman?
Tell him you called that number to order a pizza, call him the name she called him.