I previously posted about my girlfriend getting really mad at me about my female friendships and making me cut my best friends off. I recently went through her texts for the first time since we started dating ~9 months ago and found that she has consistently been texting this guy (~30M) that she had told me was just a friend. She says they’ve only hooked up once (well before we started dating), and the texts back this up, but they have had sexual/flirty texts going for months and she sent one nude.
I am crushed. She is extremely apologetic, swears she is going to change, she sent a text cutting the guy off, says she is willing to go to therapy, will do anything to keep me. She said she was projecting her insecurities on me about my friends, and says I can have my friends back, etc. I’ve texted my friends who I cut off but they, very understandable, have not responded. She says she will do anything for a second chance. I do love her so much still, but idk if I am crazy for putting up with stuff like this and giving her another chance.
TL;DR my girlfriend has been sexting a “friend” for months and wants a second chance.
Comments
Don’t fall for it. Cheaters never change. Show her the door and let her do whatever she wants while shes single. You can find better.
Yes you would be crazy for giving this woman another chance.
This person has already seriously negatively impacted some of your closest relationships completely unnecessarily and has been cheating for months when you haven’t even been together a year. Your loyalty should be with your old friends. You should break up… She will probably continue to put you through hell. I hope your friends forgive you
> She is extremely apologetic, swears she is going to change, she sent a text cutting the guy off, says she is willing to go to therapy, will do anything to keep me.
…anything except “follow the rules that she herself created for you”.
She’s not upset that she did this. She’s upset that she got caught.
She’s a cheater and a hypocrite.
Walk away. No second chances.
She had her chance, and that chance was when she had the opportunity not to sext a friend behind your back for months.
She had a choice every single day. And she made a choice, every single day.
just take action and then don’t regret. And the next girl you will find, there are high chances she may cheat you in
some sense.
Ask yourself
Why do you need this girl?
if this girl is really what you need then give her total freedom. be ready to loose her and you will get her.
Don’t be a fool. You fundamentally changed your life for poor choice and now you’re left with no support system. Don’t make another bad choice on top of another.
If you stay with her, don’t come back asking anymore questions. This becomes your issue and your issue alone. Deal?
Yeah, you would be crazy.
I do think that people have the capacity to realize their mistakes and change. But this ain’t it chief. You will never get the trust back, and you will resent her forever. A clean break is the best you can do for yourself at this point.
Therapy in a relationship of NINE FUCKING MONTHS, EVERY one of which she has been cheating on you?????? It’s a joke, right?
Break up. She is ruining your life.
Her: “Oh, no, I’m so sorry. ”
Your only valid response: “For what? Getting caught?”
Buddy. The moment it became Rules For Thee But Not For Me, you walk.
You will be crazy and an AH to yourself if you keep this woman around.
Come on, man. Have some self respect.
Honestly still have a weird pull with the feeling of having love for an ex that I had leave after cheating, it’s been almost 8 months. I would never go back after leaving, & the things you find out after can be mind blowing.
Much happier without but obviously there are things you’ll miss in the end you do find better.
At least I think I have.
If you decide you’re cool with your girl sending nudes to other guys…could you give me her number?
Buddy….its only been 9 months….this is a lot of shit to deal with