https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/s/65ipCjNtS5
UPDATE
So i finally brought it up. at first he thought i was just mad about him doing it and got quite defensive saying i shouldn’t make it a problem in our relationship and hes not gonna stop doing it. then when i brought up that its the fact hes hiding it he said he was just embarrassed bc he thought it was cringe, and he didnt wanna do it in front of me bc he didnt wanna start shit. said theres nothing else going on besides embarrassment. not sure what to think of this.
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Me (20F) and partner (22M) have been together for almost a year now. for the past few months he has been hiding his phone from me. examples of this are turning his brightness down then opening an app then moving to instagram then turning the brightness back, facing away from me and going silent, taking his phone with him everywhere, taking 10 mins to do something that usually takes 2 mins, using the bathroom more often etc.
in the first few months of our relationship, he admitted to having a previous gambling addiction which resulted in him losing all his money and he also admitted the impact it had on his attention toward his partner at the time. he promised me that he had got it under control and that it would not happen again.
last year, it got bad again and i noticed a huge lack of attention to me when we were hanging out, not long after he had admitted to me that he had lost all of his money due to him gambling (sport betting). we had a talk about this and he promised it wouldnt happen again.
my partner is a huge footy fan, when the footy had started back again he told me he would be betting again however wouldnt be betting huge amounts as he did previously and that it wouldnt be something he hid from me.
due to his previous account being banned i agreed to give him my details so he could create another one. which i now deeply regret. since then i have never seen him open the app around me, and as explained at the start he has been going through many lengths to hide his phone from me.
im not sure why he feels the need to hide it from me if he isnt betting huge amounts of money like he said. im not sure what to think of this and im worried to bring it up. is there any other explanation to this or is my overthinking correct?
TLDR – boyfriend is hiding his phone, has a previous gambling addiction need advice
Comments
That is the dumbest excuse ever. Do not fall for that.
run for the hills, your reaction to his behavior isnt the problem, his behavior is.
Mate… come on. He admits has a history of gambling problems. He got his account locked (presumably to help reduce his addiction) and you helped him get around it by giving him your details… that feels like giving a drug addict a key to your medicine cabinet which contains more drugs. He’s embarrassed because he’s probably lost another shitton of money, potentially in your name.
I don’t know if you have any payment details linked to your account that he now uses, but I would do a sneaky credit check on yourself just incase…
Afaik, gambling addiction is like alcohol addiction. If you start consuming again, you will get addicted again … and quickly. Is he in actual treatment?
Also, in EU countries have “self-excluding registries” where you can submit yourself and then the sites should not allow you to play. If your country has one and if he is serious about not gambling again, he should be there.
Close account that is on your name, before legal repercussions from debt and losses hit you.