I don’t think I can truly tell anyone in my life this. I’ve messed around with cocaine on and off over the years and weed and mushrooms. Well it’s been about a year since I’ve done anything. Long story short I went on a bender and did some mushrooms and coke. After doing enough of it… I started to feel weird. Like my body was starting to shut down. Mostly my left side as I was laying down. My left hand started to get really numb and my stomach started to become rock hard and my body was cold. My breathing became shallow and I started to forget to breathe. I fought for almost an hour to keep myself awake and it became harder to breathe. It was like impending doom. My breathing became so shallow and I could feel my chest and lungs stopping to take oxygen. and I started to feel lumps in my leg and my skin became pale. I kept walking around and as I did my vision became fuzzy until I almost couldn’t breath at all. My organs felt like they were falling asleep. I sat there on the edge of my bed and said no you have to keep fighting. Eventually I became to accept that it was the end. Naturally I wanted to call the police but I didn’t want to go through with it for a few reasons: what if I wasn’t going to die and it was fine and then I started a whole situation of just panicking. The other reason was I guess I accepted if this was really the end of my life I guess. And it was semi peaceful. I put my hands in a praying position and started to pray. Not for life just for everyone else. I now realize I was probably like so close to the end of my life it wasn’t even funny. I don’t know how to feel about it. I do think I probably won’t do any kind of drugs that cause overdoses anymore but still….it was wild. I’m 29. I don’t want any sympathy. I just needed to let it out somewhere. I went to work the next day and pretended like nothing happened. I’ve pretended like nothing happened to everyone in my life. It was actually the most scary/ most stressfulx/ peaceful thing I’ve experienced.
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Yeah… maybe don’t touch the coke again.
Too expensive anyway.
Ring ring… Ring ring… “Hello, this is your courtesy wake up call.”
When I was in my early 20s or so. I went out with some people who didn’t have my best interests in mind if you know what I mean.
I got really fucked up on who knows what. I went home and had this massive dizzy spell and was on my living room floor. I was embarrassed but then I started feeling exactly what you described.
I never considered overdose because I was naive and a misguided youth. It kind of makes sense though. It was certainly a monumental moment
I remember fighting for my life trying to keep breathing and my heart to keep going. My parents dog even came and laid next to me and kept a standing vigil. It was terrifying.
It’s a wild thing. Like I’m almost positive that if I let my self fall asleep and stop breathing that would have been the end of it. I’m not proud of it but I’m happy you’re still here. I also had uncontrollable shakes and tremors. Like my hands and arms and stuff would just shake without me purposely doing it. You live and you learn I guess. Sometimes you don’t but. It’s much more intense than it sounds when you’re actually dealing with I guess.
I’m going to guess that you weren’t close to the end of your life at all. But I think this is the “message” the shrooms were giving you: Sometimes you have to let go to start again. And sometimes the only way you’ll choose to “let go” is when it feels like there’s no other choice.
This can be an incredibly powerful and life-changing lesson. I hope you benefit from it.
Wonder if it could have been laced with even a tiny amount of fentanyl – had a friend die this way
The way you describe it made me think of opioid OD
Glad you’re ok, stuff is scary out there
I would suspect the coke had something else inside it. Maybe a non fatal dose of fent.
Don’t ever do this when solo.
Sounds like you either had a fentanyl overdose or a stimulant panic attack (my druggie friends would call it being stuck in the box).
Nurse here.
I have seen people – young people – die of heart failure due to cocaine. I mean drop down dead, dead before they hit the floor dead. And they were not at the hospital for cardiac issues, one day they just BOOM, died. Coke has no problems with killing you, its an equal opportunity killer.
One of them was one of the meanest, most hateful people I have ever seen. She had cardiomegaly, her heart took up well over half of her thoracic cavity. When I saw the xray, I literally could not believe my eyes. About three days later she dropped stone dead. She was like 30 years old.
I often wonder if she had a soul, and if so what happened to it when she died. She was mean enough to be a literal demon.
I had a widow maker heart attack at 26, 6 years later and I’m healthier, luckier and more alive than ever. I recommend changing your shit before you die.
Drop the cocaine, a mushroom here or there I personally think is good for you. Just don’t do cocaine.
Just stick with weed if you have to have something. Get therapy and go to AA meetings. Stay away from the other stuff.