TL;DR: My boyfriend is 63 and Im 41. We’ve been together for 2years now. He had a wife whom he had 3kids and they are still in touch with each other. We both have our facetime open on our laptops and we see each other’s messages. But recently, I saw his text on to his ex on Feb 14. Day after my mother passed. This is what that message says.
“If I just met you for the first time in my life today, I think I would fall in love with you all over again. You’re still so beautiful, especially when you want to be, and you have a sweet, gentle soul. But, pursuing you would be a tragic mistake for both of us because we are unbearably different on so many fundamental ideas about happiness, mutual love, parenting, intimacy—you name it.
My goal is to be okay, happy, and stress-free as much as possible. My hope is that you achieve the same. Even though you don’t understand when I tell you, I do love you very much, and your happiness and well-being are as important to me as they are for the girls. If you think I didn’t think of you on Valentine’s Day, you’re so wrong. If I just met you for the first time in my life today, I think I would fall in love with you all over again. You’re still so beautiful, especially when you want to be, and you have a sweet, gentle soul. But, pursuing you would be a tragic mistake for both of us because we are unbearably different on so many fundamental ideas about happiness, mutual love, parenting, intimacy, you name it. My goal is to be ok, happy, stress free a much as possible. My hope is that you achieve the same. Even though you don’t understand when I tell you, I do love you very much and your happiness and well being are as important for me as they are for the girls. If you think I didn’t think of you on Valentines Day, you’re so wrong”
Any thoughts as this makes me all confused and make me doubt things about us.