What can a man realistically do when there’s a power struggle between his mother and his wife?
What can a man realistically do when there’s a power struggle between his mother and his wife?
r/AskMen
What can a man realistically do when there’s a power struggle between his mother and his wife?
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Support the wife if you want to keep her. (As long as she isn’t being off the wall insane)
Put his wife in a home and eat his mother out
Wait
Insufficient data and context here. Are one or both of them nutjobs? Is it over something important?
I lived this vile scenario for three decades. Think about what the premise ACTUALLY means; incredible DISRESPECT for you the husband and son. A pox on BOTH their houses for placing You last.
Go to therapy
You have to put your wife first.
Not that you can’t help your mom when she needs it, but your wife needs to be your priority.
You can only voice your feelings to both of them and prepare some sort of course of action that shows them how shitty the behavior is.
If your mom is the primary aggressor, well, inform her that she’s being ridiculous and if it’s not respected, then perhaps maybe she won’t see you for a while.
If your wife is the primary aggressor, inform her that the entire fucking point of being married is to improve your life experiences. If she can’t be an adult, maybe she should marry someone else, because you don’t deserve years of this shit.
If they’re both mutually at fault, throw the hammer at them both. Say I will happily leave my marriage and never talk to my mom again if it means peace. I’m not fucking around.
Support and defend your wife and reduce contact with mom if you want your marriage to last.
You should back your wife firstly…. You married her and it’s your duty to do that…. She best be backing you it’s hers too. Second if its something your wife is clearly wrong about just try and seperate them without speaking about the issue and talk to your wife in private about it. And third…. By the time your married as much as you love your family and mother…their opinion should matter very little to you because your supposed to be an individual and a man and leading your own life not leading the life you mother has laid out. And I don’t mean this in a derogatory or demeaning way it’s just things to consider. Good luck
Drink a 40 and smoke a fat one.
Tell his mom to back off. She had her time, people need to be told when to let go and let somebody else take the reigns sometimes.
Physical separation is the only viable answer. The greater the dispute, the greater the distance.
Don’t get in the middle. Treat each issue involving you separately and make your best decision given the issues at hand. Avoid being manipulated by either party.
Get counseling with your wife to establish appropriate boundaries and help regulate both your interactions with mom.
Once you learn to stay out of the middle and deal with the issue at hand, your life will be easier. This may have little or no impact on your wife’s and mother’s relationship or behavior.
Tell the grandmother to educate the mother
Go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint and wait for all this to blow over.
Happy wife, happy life. You aren’t having sex with your mom. Take your wife’s side.
Always choose the one that blows you best…
I suggest the D.E.N.N.I.S system:
Demonstrate Value
Engage Physically
Nurture Dependence
Neglect Emotionally
Inspire Hope
Separate Entirely
Support your wife. No matter what.
Realistically?
SUPPORT YOUR DAM SPOUSE!
Yes she’s your mother, yes she’s important, yes she gave birth to you – but your spouse is your spouse, they always come first.
Cut the apron strings. Unless you want to marry your mother?
Choose his wife.
Or
Go back and suckle on mommy’s teat.
Figure out which one is more toxic and/or violating boundaries. Who is trying to control when freedom and/or distance is warranted?
My mother was weak my old man is not. And even though I an in no way weak both tried to dominate me. Both have strong wills. And I did just let them yap about whatever especially when our kids were tiny.
Set some boundaries, and respect for you is the foundation.
Respect will come from how you handle it.
Have private discussions to help resolve the issues. You also need to stand your ground on important principles, but be flexible.
Understand the conflict.
It’s not about who you love more — it’s a clash of roles, not hearts.
Set your priorities with grace.
Your wife is your future. Your mother is your origin.
Both deserve love — but only one shares your home.
Draw boundaries with kindness.
Speak to each with respect.
Tell your mother: “You’ll always matter, but my marriage needs space.”
Tell your wife: “I’ll protect our life, without disrespecting where I came from.
Ask for respect, not affection.
Don’t force love — just require decency.
Lead, don’t mediate.
A man doesn’t choose sides — he builds bridges and defines the rules of peace.
tell one or both of them to get the fuck over themselves.
Respect your parents, but choose your wife every time. Your family is your wife and kids. Protect it.
Support whichever one is correct, if both have a good point or a good reason for their stance on the issue, support your spouse if you want to keep your marriage. Women leave their husbands over hardly anything these days, but your mom will love you regardless. If she doesn’t, at least you’ll still have your wife.
Side with your wife in all cases
Nothing worse than the woman you love and Mom don’t vibe. Terrible position to be in. I think every situation is different. You wanna look appear to be supporting your wife but let your Mom know you see her side too. It really should depend on who YOU think is correct
Go fishing. Fuck that drama.
Try and keep them apart.
Id choose my wife ever ytime unless it was something worthy of divorce.
In public you back your wife. No ifs, no buts, she is your partner for life and you support her. In private you can tell her she is being an arse and to sort it out.
Tell your mom she raised you better than to disrespect your wife/mother of your children.
Unless one of them is obviously in the wrong, choose your wife. That’s what you agreed to do when you got married.
Tell my mom and my wife to shut the f up.
Take my wife’s side and put your mother in her place.
Live separately with my wife,but visit my mother often
Pick your wife first every time.
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