There is NOTHING wrong with my life, but i have some stressors (which are normal for any woman – career moves, moving countries, dealing with males etc.)
But many times, I feel extremely sad (i wont call it depressed as I’m not diagnosed), and low on energy. Like I am NOT in the mood to call my friends and have a hangout, or flirt back with any man. I just shut down. Unfortunately I was raised in a culture where women are discouraged from expressing something’s wrong with them since an early age, so I dont feel comfortable sharing with anyone either.
I’m not good at dealing with whenever this “spell of doom” occurs. I just browse the internet, listen to songs, but mostly stay in my room till it passes away. I feel more alone when this happens. I overthink and regret many decisions in the past or having been lazy in the past. I grieve what my life would have been if I had worked harder before. Note – I have struggled with passive s-icidal ideation for a long time.
It’s so difficult to explain. I’m sorry that this post is all over the place.
Do you also experience this? How do u deal with it? What do you do when you’re feeling sad, but also, lethargic… and feel like what’s the point of this life… and why did I make so many wrong decisions in the past… why cant I be normal like other women for once?
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I often find this happens to me when I’m like halfway through my cycle — it’s a bit earlier than PMS. It’s like pre-PMS. Does this happen to you at regular intervals?
I cry :3
I get this way right before my period. What I do is recognize the feeling then tell myself that I’ll just need to surf the depression wave for a few days, that it’s temporary, and get all my basics covered- sleep, healthy eating, hydration, and if I have the energy, something that will make me feel good (hobby, meetup with friends, etc),
Whenever I feel this way, I find comfort in little things – for example I order food that I like and I lose myself in my hobbies. I also recently started therapy which helps, so if you’re feeling like this often perhaps that’s something to consider.
I sleep. Is it productive? Nope. Is it healthy? Prob not. But something about sleeping or laying down in my comfortable bed and taking a GOOD nap can help me reset and push through. Naps are also my go-to when my anxiety is spiking.
Go to bed usually.
I do some journaling.
I get some sun and it helps immensely. Exercise is also a mood booster.
Sounds hormonal! Perhaps you’re in your luteal phase. This calls for a spa day
This is literally me right now and I’m about to start my period. Doesn’t make it any less brutal though. Being a woman is tough sometimes!!
Just btw, you’re allowed to say you’re depressed even if you’re not formally diagnosed. You might want to look into that, though, because that sure is what it sounds like.
Sorry to hear you have these intense periods of sadness. I can get this way too from time to time. One thing I do is I go to the gym/move my body. I’ll tell you right now it’ll be hard to get yourself up and dressed, but if you can literally move your body, you might be able to feel better. When my sadness is extreme I just put on a song I can’t help but dance to (mine’s Bad Mama Jama…which isn’t that big of a hype song but it really hypes me up!) and I dance for those 3 minutes right there. If you’ve got a medium amount of motivation, or even after your baby dance party, you can go for a walk outside. A 20 minute walk will do wonders to mood and motivation. And, the ultimate if you can get dressed and get to the location, is to work out. Let the feelings out through a workout, which might be yoga or it might be cardio or it might be lifting. For me, it’s typically cycling that helps, and I like to watch cycling videos so I don’t have to create my own workout, but rather can just follow along.
Hope this helps!
Cuddle my dog.
This sure does sound like depression (which you are allowed to call it if you’re feeling it). Anti-depressants saved me when I was in my lowest stages of life (feeling similarly to what you’ve described), in addition to opening up to my friends about my sadness, trying to stay physically active and pushing myself to try new things outside of my comfort zone.
If talking about this stuff with others feels way too difficult, try using Chat GPT to unload all of these emotions and see how that feels. It’s a pretty smart and accessible tool that could help you navigate some of these feelings and figure out what your next steps should be 🙂 It has helped me process big emotions in the past and I still use it when I cant see my therapist!
I get my bloods checked. Often turns out that I’m just deficient in something. Usually B12 and Vitamin D but once it was my thyroid. Felt much better on my supplements/meds 🙂
When it turns out I’m actually just depressed, I do exercise. Bouldering, gym, whatever I can reasonably kick myself out of the house for.
Snuggle my dog
If I’m leaning into it, I have a playlist of maudlin songs from when I was a teenager. If I’m looking for distraction, funny videos on YouTube (Randy Rainbow or animal videos).
I watch sad movies so that I can have a big cry, without necessarily just working and reworking through emotions that I know will pass.
A big cry and a good sleep help a lot. Journaling is also good.
If I’m grieving, I just do whatever to survive the day.
If I’m “just” sad, I put on something nice on YouTube, e.g. Chain Japan (it’s just suc lovely videos, so find them really calming and inspiring) or Smosh for some laughs, especially their Moose Master series or Try Not To Laugh series
Sometimes, if I feel a little sorry for myself, I put on True Crime podcasts. They give me a reality check/wake-up call and make me realise that, hey, I’m actually doing ok. Sounds kinda shitty when I say it out loud. Then I try to think of the things I’m grateful for.
That’s called depression
Anytime I feel sad stressed or anxious I read a good book to forget my troubles