A successful career (especially considering I did really well in school). Good mental health. I was also led to believe there would be hoverboards and flying cars by now.
My mom being around to see me turn 21 and graduate college, have a kid and be involved in its life as the best grandma ever, get married and be at the wedding, etc. She passed before any of that could happen.
For my life to follow the normal trajectory of people that I grew up around. Grow up, go to college, find a spouse in your 20’s, get married, buy a house, pop out a few kids by 30, get fat, have a midlife crisis by 40, send the kids off to colleges themselves, maybe get a divorce or start taking empty nest trips to Cancun while everyone drinks and party’s… it all sounds so suffocating!
I did the college thing and just ran from the rest of it. The perk? I am so freaking happy with my life because I did what I wanted to instead of unconsciously following some stupid ass “expected” trajectory of my life that just sounded so miserable to me and would make me feel stuck.
Write your obituary for your actual life now (obit A). Then write the obituary you would want if you were doing life like you truly want to (Obit B). Now go make Obit B happen!!! I did and I am so freaking happy!!
Time. Time to do what I want to do. All of my time was spent working for others in one way or another. I want to go hiking and horseback riding but now, that time has passed, I’m too old to do the things that I wanted to do.
A job that was either creative or helping people. I have 2 degrees, one in applied social care, and the other in photography. I got firsts in both. Economy and job opportunities where I live said nope.
For my college education and work ethic alone to bring me a lifestyle like the ones my parents and grandparents had. I bought my first house at 37, it’s a modest place and I cannot imagine how we would get by if we had kids.
I’ve been fat my whole life. Size 22 now, weighed 170 when I was 11-16. I’ve been told I have a “pretty face” but I don’t know how true that is. I get treated really badly in a lot of ways because of my weight.
A happy childhood. I grew up in a family that was well off financially, but totally lacking in the happiness department. Dad was a rageaholic. Mom was a pushover. It was a TOXIC environment. Very tense. My sibling and I would spend more time at our friends’ houses.
I’m happy to say, I broke the mold. I married the best, most supportive woman in the world and we have a GREAT, HAPPY MARRIAGE… and we have happy kids!
Some kind of love life, I’ve never even dated. By the time someone asked if I was single and if they could ask me out, I was so embarrassed and nervous by my lack of experience that I just said I wasn’t looking. I’m mostly at peace with it but every now and then I do wonder how different my life have been if i’d have been brave enough to put myself out there
It’s been so strange going from never having a problem making friends, having close family and neighbor connections, always got along well with differing personalities and coworkers, etc – to marrying into a family that just really doesn’t like me as a person.
I have lots of friends, a great community surrounding me and my family, get along great with my kids friends parents, everything – so I know it’s not me haha. They just don’t like “the kind of cloth I’m cut from” and have 1 very specific type of person they’d wanted their son to marry and that wasn’t and never will be me.
I am a very likeable person, it really never occurred to me that I would unfortunately be one of many who has a “momster-in-law/ don’t get along with the in-laws”. Yet here I am.
Comments
Love
Private yacht/jet aeroplane/personal helicopter. Recreational submarine. Trips to space.
A successful career (especially considering I did really well in school). Good mental health. I was also led to believe there would be hoverboards and flying cars by now.
What the other person has 🤣
For my son to have grandparents
A flying car in the millennium. They damn near promised us that shit when I was a kid in the 80’s
To travel in my retirement
My mom being around to see me turn 21 and graduate college, have a kid and be involved in its life as the best grandma ever, get married and be at the wedding, etc. She passed before any of that could happen.
I thought I’d have a kid. Never did, 99% likely won’t. Not that sad about it tbh.
Also hoped that I’d feel beautiful for at least a moment. Not yet.
To not worry about money
A dog but still working on it
A stable relationship and family.
True love
Not having to worry about money, about paying rent, about work and about idiots.
Time with friends. Beach trips, shopping trips, girl trips. I never had that.
Mental peace.
a faithful husband
Freedom.
I expected to have more rights than the women before me…. but well… for us US bound women, we are doing a slow roll back in time.
Someone to come and ‘save me’
A gameboy
At least an engagement by my age, if not a marriage
For my life to follow the normal trajectory of people that I grew up around. Grow up, go to college, find a spouse in your 20’s, get married, buy a house, pop out a few kids by 30, get fat, have a midlife crisis by 40, send the kids off to colleges themselves, maybe get a divorce or start taking empty nest trips to Cancun while everyone drinks and party’s… it all sounds so suffocating!
I did the college thing and just ran from the rest of it. The perk? I am so freaking happy with my life because I did what I wanted to instead of unconsciously following some stupid ass “expected” trajectory of my life that just sounded so miserable to me and would make me feel stuck.
Write your obituary for your actual life now (obit A). Then write the obituary you would want if you were doing life like you truly want to (Obit B). Now go make Obit B happen!!! I did and I am so freaking happy!!
I always thought I’d get to wear a poofy dress—although I guess I did for a few hours, playing Glinda the Good Witch at a work function
A good job (after studying I thought eventually those things fall into place)
Thought I would have better earnings (as a result of the good job that never came)
Also love/building a family…
🤷🏾♀️🙏🏾
A fuckin break! Holy Moses life just doesn’t stop!
Living to a reasonably old age(idk, 70+ at least?), with all that comes with it.
A dad that cared about me and my feelings/life.
I thought I’d have a man and a kid by now.
To feel like a grown up. Realising that the adults in your life growing up didn’t suddenly know everything they were just winging it for the most part
A loving family
Adventure
To see my kid grow up.
A babies arm holding an apple
a successful career, not having to worry about money, support from family
Love, acceptance, understanding, friendship
A career and my own family
A proper friend group
Retirement. I will be working until I die
A degree 😂🤣
Time. Time to do what I want to do. All of my time was spent working for others in one way or another. I want to go hiking and horseback riding but now, that time has passed, I’m too old to do the things that I wanted to do.
[removed]
A fair shake or at least a break once in a while.
Equality
A dad who doesn’t just call me to talk about the women he’s banging
Peace within myself. I enjoyed it for a brief period in the 80s and never once experienced it again.
Peace within myself. I enjoyed it for a brief period in the 80s and never once experienced it again.
A job that was either creative or helping people. I have 2 degrees, one in applied social care, and the other in photography. I got firsts in both. Economy and job opportunities where I live said nope.
Watching movies as a kid I was 100% convinced I was gonna look like Megan fox when I grew up
A partner to go through life with
My soul mate and marriage
Children 😔
A home. A stable one that’s actually mine.
One single full-time job that pays my living expenses.
At this point, I’m not sure I’m hoping for a career. I’m not sure what “success” even means anymore.
But I really did expect to get by on one job.
I’m 38. That hasn’t even come close to happening.
For my college education and work ethic alone to bring me a lifestyle like the ones my parents and grandparents had. I bought my first house at 37, it’s a modest place and I cannot imagine how we would get by if we had kids.
Children. I suppose its not too late yet…
I thought I would, at some point, know what the hell I am doing.
A marriage that lasted
Love, trust, support, and respect.
I don’t trust anybody, I’m always alone, and I’ve never found love only sex.
To get married
my own home
Being pretty.
I’ve been fat my whole life. Size 22 now, weighed 170 when I was 11-16. I’ve been told I have a “pretty face” but I don’t know how true that is. I get treated really badly in a lot of ways because of my weight.
Boobs
A happy childhood. I grew up in a family that was well off financially, but totally lacking in the happiness department. Dad was a rageaholic. Mom was a pushover. It was a TOXIC environment. Very tense. My sibling and I would spend more time at our friends’ houses.
I’m happy to say, I broke the mold. I married the best, most supportive woman in the world and we have a GREAT, HAPPY MARRIAGE… and we have happy kids!
Some kind of love life, I’ve never even dated. By the time someone asked if I was single and if they could ask me out, I was so embarrassed and nervous by my lack of experience that I just said I wasn’t looking. I’m mostly at peace with it but every now and then I do wonder how different my life have been if i’d have been brave enough to put myself out there
A real life partner and possibly a kid or two with them
Being swept off my feet and taken too a fairytale life. Maybe like the movie “Beauty and the Beast”!
Romantic kind of Love and affection
Good mental health
More kids, fidelity and care.
In-laws that genuinely liked me.
It’s been so strange going from never having a problem making friends, having close family and neighbor connections, always got along well with differing personalities and coworkers, etc – to marrying into a family that just really doesn’t like me as a person.
I have lots of friends, a great community surrounding me and my family, get along great with my kids friends parents, everything – so I know it’s not me haha. They just don’t like “the kind of cloth I’m cut from” and have 1 very specific type of person they’d wanted their son to marry and that wasn’t and never will be me.
I am a very likeable person, it really never occurred to me that I would unfortunately be one of many who has a “momster-in-law/ don’t get along with the in-laws”. Yet here I am.
I expected life to be fair.
lol it is not